Lets make Friday 'Joke Day'!
- Thread starter Let'sgoflying!
- Start date
That first picture doesn't look like 1974... turns out it was 1957.
AV8R_87
Line Up and Wait
Joke's on the guys who bought the original computer, thinking that will be all the processing power they'll ever need.
Ashara Keliyn
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Ashara
Two neighbors meet on the street.
"Hey John, stop buy this evening I'll give you money so you can invest in some curtains, otherwise I can see from my house when you copulate with your wife."
"Hey Bill, better invest that money in some binoculars so you can better see WHOSE wife I'm copulating with"
"Hey John, stop buy this evening I'll give you money so you can invest in some curtains, otherwise I can see from my house when you copulate with your wife."
"Hey Bill, better invest that money in some binoculars so you can better see WHOSE wife I'm copulating with"
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Snorting his way across the USA
A Scotsman brings a sheep in to the living room where his wife is seated and announces "this is the fat pig I scr*** when you aren't around."
His wife looks confused and says "that's not a pig. That is a sheep."
The Scotsman retorts "be quiet! I wasn't talking to you!"
His wife looks confused and says "that's not a pig. That is a sheep."
The Scotsman retorts "be quiet! I wasn't talking to you!"
Matthew
Touchdown! Greaser!
Dude…I just did a spit take of my coffee.
aterry1067
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Alpha_Delta_Tango
aterry1067
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Alpha_Delta_Tango
2-Bit Speed
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2-Bit Speed
Bit dated but...
2-Bit Speed
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luvflyin
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Due to the increased cost of food, the 5 second rule has been increased to 3 hours
Charlie Golf
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JOhnH
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Personally, I think he should be wondering when he will be able to set foot outside of jail again.
Capt. Geoffrey Thorpe
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MauleSkinner
Touchdown! Greaser!
Not sure which smiley would be appropriate…most of them could have some unintended implications. I certainly wouldn’t use a “thumb up.”
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The Little Arrow That Could
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Bob Noel
you got an advanced look at the new and improved russian drones!
luvflyin
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Once upon a time there lived a king. The king had a beautiful daughter, the princess. But there was a problem. Everything the princess touched would melt.
No matter what; metal, wood, plastic - anything she touched would melt! Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her.
The king despaired. What could he do to help his daughter? He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the king, "If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, she will be cured."
The king was overjoyed. The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king's wealth. Three young princes took up the challenge.
The first prince brought a very hard alloy of titanium. But alas, once the princess touched it, it melted. The prince went away sadly.
The second prince brought a huge diamond, thinking that diamond is the hardest substance in the world and will not melt. But alas, once the princess touched it, it melted. He too went away disappointed.
The third prince approached. He told the princess, "Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there." The princess did as she was asked, though she turned red. She felt something hard. She held it in her hand. And it did not melt!!!
The king was overjoyed. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed. And the third prince married the princess and they both lived happily ever after.
Question: What was the object in the prince's pants?
x
x
x
They were M&M's!!!
Everyone knows they melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
No matter what; metal, wood, plastic - anything she touched would melt! Because of this, men were afraid of her. Nobody would dare marry her.
The king despaired. What could he do to help his daughter? He consulted his wizards and magicians. One wizard told the king, "If your daughter touches one thing that does not melt in her hands, she will be cured."
The king was overjoyed. The next day, he held a competition. Any man that could bring his daughter an object that would not melt would marry her and inherit the king's wealth. Three young princes took up the challenge.
The first prince brought a very hard alloy of titanium. But alas, once the princess touched it, it melted. The prince went away sadly.
The second prince brought a huge diamond, thinking that diamond is the hardest substance in the world and will not melt. But alas, once the princess touched it, it melted. He too went away disappointed.
The third prince approached. He told the princess, "Put your hand in my pocket and feel what is in there." The princess did as she was asked, though she turned red. She felt something hard. She held it in her hand. And it did not melt!!!
The king was overjoyed. Everybody in the kingdom was overjoyed. And the third prince married the princess and they both lived happily ever after.
Question: What was the object in the prince's pants?
x
x
x
They were M&M's!!!
Everyone knows they melt in your mouth, not in your hand.
Charlie Golf
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MauleSkinner
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My daughter, who worked as a lifeguard and trained lifeguards for over 10 years says “lol” (especially with the quotes)also looks like a drowning person.
aterry1067
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Alpha_Delta_Tango
Why can't it be an imaginary mother and a real father?
aterry1067.
stirrer of the sh*tpot
Thanks nauga!
AV8R_87
Line Up and Wait
That's more of an imaginary scenario.
flyingpreacher
Pre-takeoff checklist
And quite complex!
Matthew
Touchdown! Greaser!
I think for there to be a kid in the first place there has to be a common denominator.
Capt. Geoffrey Thorpe
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Light and Sporty Guy
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Mantis Toboggan, MD
If you just use a little imagination, you’ll realize that the product of that hook-up will turn out to be a pretty negative individual...