Lets make Friday 'Joke Day'!

Why did the rooster cross the road?

'Cause he ain't chicken!

*** I'll see myself out ***
 
Courtesy of my late Uncle Bill, who passed away about 20 years ago. "If someone offers you a job driving a truck in 1944 in the Ardennes Forest, try to get out of it."

He was a good guy, kind and funny.
 
Domenick said:
$20 !
Just thread a loop of string through a cotton ball and put a few drops of Hoppes #9 on it and hang from rear view mirror. Might want to experiment with a few drops of bourbon too.
Click to expand...
Mmmm... Mil spec Break Free doesn't have quite the same delectable aroma. If it weren't for aluminum frames and nitride finish...
 
Domenick said:
$20 !
Just thread a loop of string through a cotton ball and put a few drops of Hoppes #9 on it and hang from rear view mirror. Might want to experiment with a few drops of bourbon too.
Click to expand...
Filling your car interior with bourbon fumes would make even the most routine traffic stop awkward. Although Hoppes might get your car searched for the hidden firearms...
 
MauleSkinner said:
I might suggest this to our IT department for their “phishing tests.”
Click to expand...
As an alternative, just have the link redirect to a photo of your CEO with an unwavering Samuel L Jackson stare... like this... With the text "you done F'd up"

SLJ.gif

They'll check their links after that.
 
A bar gets robbed. The bartender dials 911 and three minutes later Sting shows up.

Bartended asks, "What are you doing here?"

"Well, you called The Police."
 
It could backfire...

en.wikipedia.org

Redd Foxx - Wikipedia

en.wikipedia.org en.wikipedia.org

Foxx did his scripted part of the scene (walking across the back of a chair) while being livid, then immediately fell to the floor. Reese said that nobody initially suspected that anything was wrong, as Foxx was famous for Fred Sanford's fake heart attacks on Sanford and Son and was particularly skilled at pratfalls. When he did not immediately rise, Reese went to the floor<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redd_Foxx#cite_note-37"><span>[</span>37<span>]</span></a> and heard him say "get my wife" twice.<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redd_Foxx#cite_note-jet-38"><span>[</span>38<span>]</span></a> Reese called for paramedics.<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redd_Foxx#cite_note-jet-38"><span>[</span>38<span>]</span></a> According to Joshua Rich at Entertainment Weekly: "It was an end so ironic that for a brief moment castmates figured Foxx–whose 1970s TV character often faked coronaries–was kidding when he grabbed a chair and fell to the floor."<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redd_Foxx#cite_note-rich1998-39"><span>[</span>39<span>]</span></a> Eddie Murphy, a producer on the show, credited him with being the most "naturally funny person" he'd known.<a href="https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Redd_Foxx#cite_note-40"><span>[</span>40<span>]</span></a>

Foxx was temporarily resuscitated and taken to Queen of Angels Hollywood Presbyterian Medical Center. Four and a half hours after admission, he was pronounced dead
 
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