Mischaracterization.
At no time did I make this personal other than to say I'm comfortable with the process, and YMMV. That's it.
Fact: Until this week the FAA had not issued any AD or order to inspect the fan blades. ADs had been issued in 2010 and 2012 for different CFM engines. The airline was under no obligation to conduct other than routine/regular inspections absent an AD. That's fact. If you want to verify it, here's the link to the FAA AD database list of CFM ADs:
https://www.faa.gov/regulations_policies/airworthiness_directives/search/?q=CFM
Having dealt with both the FAA and other federal regulatory agencies (and having worked for one such agency in the past), the normal process - absent an "emergency order" - is to propose an AD and ask for comments. I have not read the actual comments (perhaps you have), but my understanding is that Southwest requested a longer compliance period. In either case - the proposed period or Southwest's request - this event occurred before that period would have ended IF the AD had been issued. It hadn't, so there was no mandatory compliance.
I can also state that most entities - commercial airlines all the way down to the bug smashers - take a view that doing work before an order (or AD) is final may well be counterproductive. Why? Because the specific requirements of the inspection may change, resulting in the need to redo (or cost more) for the inspection.
I'll make it personal to me - this does not apply to you: I owned a Commander 112TC for quite a while. The FAA came out with an AD that would have required major work on the tail feathers just to inspect the elevator spar for cracks. By major work, I mean removing the elevator from the plane, removing elevator ribs, removing the end caps, cleaning, inspection with certain gear, reassembling the elevator and ribs using new hardware, and reinstalling/rebalancing. A short time after the AD came out, an AMOC was released to permit the use of a borescope without removing the elevator from the plane (and without the potential damage from removing/reriviting the rib). Huge cost difference. I liken it to the difference between a full colonoscopy and the use of the new Cologard testing. I'll point out that such has nothing to do with you.
While this doesn't apply directly to the situation at hand, it does point out the risk/reward before an AD becomes final and the potential for a much better solution through an AMOC process. I'll also point to the Samsung Note 7 matter: Samsung issued a recall and warning without involving the CPSC - they got in trouble because it was not "official" and they were supposed to notify the CPSC, who was supposed to issue the recall, which Samsung was supposed to comply with. In other words, they got their hands slapped for taking their own action without government agency officialdom. From my experience in industry, I know that other companies wouldn't want to be similarly raked over the coals for doing things in the absence of an official order. Companies will deny that, but it does happen.
Am I comfortable that a woman died? No. Not in the least.
Did the process work? It worked as it was designed to work. There was no AD or order, Southwest had no mandate to comply, and frankly any inspection they did may not have complied with the final AD. Serious question: if you were running techops/QA for Southwest, what standard would you have inspected to absent an FAA order?
Should the process be changed? Good question. First we need to define the goal. The design the best process we can to achieve that goal. As an engineer who qualified for 6-sigma, I can tell you that it's a lot harder taking a system from 1-2 major accidents/deaths a year to eliminating the risk of even a single death in 9 years. Can it be done? Probably. Do we have the current process in place to do it? Probably not.
Yes, there will be lawsuits. Yes, Southwest will be held to account for what happened. And yes, the airline will point to the lack of a final FAA AD.
Regulations cut both ways: they can help make things safer or consumer friendly, but at the same time they impose rigid requirements that discourage some voluntary actions that might improve things even more.