Should I tell the truth or should I lie?

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PPC1052

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Should I tell my son from the beginning (he's 16 months) that there is no Santa Clause, or should I lie to him and let him (and the rest of his family) have the fun that can come from the excitement it generates?

If you think I should lie, how do you explain it to him after he finds out the truth?

Thanks in advance for your opinions. I don't think there is a wrong answer. (Although I grant that Henning might prove me wrong in this belief.:wink2:)
 
I'm pretty sure you can just avoid the issue and let it ride, and eventually he will figure it out on his own.

Consider it a test. If he hasn't figured it out by say, age 16, you may have some other pressing issues.
 
We didn't make too big a deal of it, they eventually figured it out for themselves. But we didn't make a big deal about Santa being real, either, it was just a game we played along with.

We moved into a house that had a gas fireplace, vented out the side, so no chimney. My kids asked, "How is Santa going to get in?" I said, "I dunno, we'll have to see what happens."

Another morning I was greeted with a grumpy, "Santa didn't come last night."
"Why do you say that?"
"Because those presents were here yesterday."
"Oh, yeah, I see. Were ALL those presents here yesterday?"
".........SANTA CAME!!!!"
 
What there is no Santa?! Gaaaaah.
 
Santa is an attitude. A spirit. Let him enjoy it. We all have a spell of disbelief in the teenage years when we're the smartest beings on earth (ask a teenager) and come full circle as adults.

Do you believe in God?
 
I never felt slighted that my mom lied to me about Santa. Now, there are a lot of other lies she told me that I DO care about.

I figure there's not much harm either way. Presents show up, the real excitement is in opening them. We did Christmas this past weekend and it was a lot of fun letting our son open presents and see the huge smile when he got his very own multimeter, just like dad's.

(he likes tools, so we bought him some tools from Harbor Freight)
 
Are you going to inform the child what Christmas is celebrating and how Constantine moved christs birthday to align with then current pagan holidays? If so stick with the truth. If you're going to lie about that then stick with the lie and buy a Santa suit.
 
I thought the same, ended up lying. The power of Santa as a threat/bribe will be hard to resist.
 
There are four stages in life: You believe in Santa Claus. You don't believe in Santa Claus. You are Santa Claus. You look like Santa Claus.
 
If you tell him the truth, the other parents are going to hate you. :)
 
There's a difference between telling the kids that there is a Santa, and not telling them that there isn't. I don't think we ever told them Santa is real, we just didn't ever tell them he wasn't - they made up their own minds. We did give them presents from each of us to them, and did put a "From Santa" on presents we stuck under the tree overnight. So I guess we did lie to them that way.
 
Why don't you give him a copy of the Polar Express? My older kids get it.
 
Stewartb said:
Santa is an attitude. A spirit. Let him enjoy it. We all have a spell of disbelief in the teenage years when we're the smartest beings on earth (ask a teenager) and come full circle as adults.



Do you believe in God?
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Well said.
 
What did your parents do?

If you think you turned out all right, then do what your parents did.

PPC1052 said:
Should I tell my son from the beginning (he's 16 months) that there is no Santa Clause, or should I lie to him and let him (and the rest of his family) have the fun that can come from the excitement it generates?

If you think I should lie, how do you explain it to him after he finds out the truth?

Thanks in advance for your opinions. I don't think there is a wrong answer. (Although I grant that Henning might prove me wrong in this belief.:wink2:)
Click to expand...
 
Not really sure what this has to do with the OP’s question, but here goes.

When I was a kid, my father was the Personnel Manager of a large department store in downtown Cleveland – it’s actually the store where Ralphie goes to see Santa in the “A Christmas Story” movie. My parents only had one car in those days, and Dad usually took it to work. During the Christmas season he often had to work late as the store was open later hours and had to hire extra Christmas help. One evening during the Christmas season, though, he would leave the car at home, and my mom and brother and I would drive downtown and meet dad for dinner, shopping, and to see Santa.

Of course, we saw the Santa at his store. He told us that was the “real” Santa and the Santas at the other department stores downtown were only “Santa’s Helpers.”

Little did we know, the Santa at his store was one of the extra Christmas help that Dad had hired. He’d “prep” the Santa about our visit, tell him our names, our teacher’s names, what grade we were in, etc. I’d climb up on his lap and he’s say “Hi, Kevin” (he knew my name before I told him! He must be real!) “have you been a good boy?” “Yes, Santa” “we’ll I don’t know about that, didn’t you get in a big fight with your brother last Thursday” (“Holy smoke – I’m sunk – this guy knows everything!”).

As a result, I probably believed in Santa a lot longer than most kids. When I figured it out, I didn’t feel betrayed. It was all good fun, and I have some great memories about it now.
 
My kids are in their mid to late 20s, I still maintain to them that Santa is real. I never made a big deal about it, but when asked directly I told them I believed in Santa.
 
I remember walking through town where I went to college. There was always a Santa chair out on one corner (still is) for kids to visit with Santa. They make a big deal about Santa needing to be rescued from the roof and bring a FD ladder truck out to get him down.

But Santa needs his breaks, union rules I guess, and doesn't always look the same after his breaks as he did before. I walked past him one day and noticed he was black. I did a double take, smiled, and waved. He smiled his jolly smile and waved back - life was good.
 
The day he says there is no Santa you can stop buying presents. Tell him that when he is 9 or 10 and you will never have to worry about it. He will believe in Santa the rest of his life.
 
PPC1052 said:
Should I tell my son from the beginning (he's 16 months) that there is no Santa Clause, or should I lie to him and let him (and the rest of his family) have the fun that can come from the excitement it generates?

If you think I should lie, how do you explain it to him after he finds out the truth?

Thanks in advance for your opinions. I don't think there is a wrong answer. (Although I grant that Henning might prove me wrong in this belief.:wink2:)
Click to expand...

As a small child there is no issue, they don't really understand anything but the love and the gifts anyway. As they get older though and form the thought processes to ask, it's time to come clean and admit that it's all a bit of fun like getting to live in a story for a night.
 
Matthew said:
There's a difference between telling the kids that there is a Santa, and not telling them that there isn't. I don't think we ever told them Santa is real, we just didn't ever tell them he wasn't - they made up their own minds. We did give them presents from each of us to them, and did put a "From Santa" on presents we stuck under the tree overnight. So I guess we did lie to them that way.
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Probably the best way to handle it.
 
I figured out at a very early age that Santa was a myth, because he seemed to be everywhere at once.

Soon after, I figured out there was no god, when he seemed to be nowhere when needed.
 
Geico266 said:
The day he says there is no Santa you can stop buying presents. Tell him that when he is 9 or 10 and you will never have to worry about it. He will believe in Santa the rest of his life.
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The fun years were the few years where my daughter knew what the deal was, but was just cautious enough not to come out and declare that Santa didn't exist. Like ishe was afraid if she said it maybe the presents would stop. Priceless.

I had a lot of fun asking her Santa questions those two years!
 
Bill Jennings said:
The fun years were the few years where my daughter knew what the deal was, but was just cautious enough not to come out and declare that Santa didn't exist. Like ishe was afraid if she said it maybe the presents would stop. Priceless.

I had a lot of fun asking her Santa questions those two years!
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Red Skelton (if you are old enough to remember him) said in one of his monologs that when you stop believing in Santa Claus you start getting underware and ties for Christmas. :D

I still believe in Santa! ;). :rolleyes:
 
MickYoumans said:
Red Skelton (if you are old enough to remember him)
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Remember him? I saw him live. It was, admittedly, at the very end of his career. But my grandparents and I had a great time.
 
Scott@KTYR said:
What did your parents do?

If you think you turned out all right, then do what your parents did.
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That's not really relevant here. Without going into too much detail, I have a chance to do things better.
 
Captain said:
Are you going to inform the child what Christmas is celebrating and how Constantine moved christs birthday to align with then current pagan holidays? If so stick with the truth. If you're going to lie about that then stick with the lie and buy a Santa suit.
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Santa Claus carrying toys around in a flying reindeer sled is just as believable to me as all the supernatural tall tales told in the bible. We preach all kinds of absurdity in this country. Why stop at Santa.
 
At a Christmas Eve family / friends get-together, I once overheard my youngest niece (then 6) saying to her friend, "Oh, c'mon. You don't still believe in that Santa Claus bull****, do you?"

Rich
 
SixPapaCharlie said:
If you tell him the truth, the other parents are going to hate you. :)
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Not so bad. We told our son the truth from the start, largely because of the devastation it seemed to cause older kids. And also told him that other kids believed in Santa and that he shouldn't burst their beliefs, because it would hurt their feelings badly. He also shouldn't correct adults, as they all know Santa isn't real but like to speak as though he is.

He broke the second rule a few times, but never the first.

It's a very similar discussion to one we had about religion. People choose to believe in all kinds of things. They can do that.

For the first couple of years, we just didn't mention it. Then, at two years old, he started asking why Santa was in so many places at once.
 
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PPC1052 said:
That's not really relevant here. Without going into too much detail, I have a chance to do things better.
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My attitude as well.
 
No Santa,no Easter bunny,no tooth fairy, my whole life is in a shambles. Kids will tell you they believe as long as the presents keep coming in.
 
Santa can be everywhere, go up an down chimneys, et al because of the "Magic Dust."
 
When I grew up we did not celebrate Christmas for religious reasons.
To be honest it is was kind of hard when others talked about Santa and what they received. What do you tell other kids? Santa is not real and we do not do Christmas.
There are some Jewish people here what did they so when they were kids?

Now one of my granddaughters is getting to the age where she is questions Santa. Her dad has a good answer. If you believe in him you will get presents from him if you do not believe he will not get you presents.
 
My favorite memory of Santa was formed well into my adulthood. I was driving a RIB into a harbor after a dive, when...there he was!!!

Santa flew low overhead in a lime green helicopter. He smiled and waved as he passed.
 
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