@MauleSkinner Thanks for providing additional information. I can only imagine the intensity of that situation and the residual effects that has and will likely continue to have. Those above have addressed the majority of the significant concerns. As stated, if the boundaries are being pushed to that degree that physical force is even anticipated, a protective order seems to be in line with sound reason. Going to a judge and laying out how the boundaries have repeatedly been crossed and showing that the less lethal option of pepper spray is not enough to make these ladies feel safe should be cause for justification.
As far as the firearms go, it has been my experience (LEO, competitive shooter, NRA instructor, etc) that the biggest cause for people being uncomfortable with firearms is lack of personal experience. Remember the first time you climbed into the cockpit of an airplane? You might have been excited, but there was probably also a bit of apprehension. Now, after hundreds or even thousands of hours, there is no fear because you are so comfortable that even if/when those "unexpected events" occur, you know what to do. Similarly, those first few hundred rounds down range take some thought and concentration, but if you can get someone who is a good instructor and would be willing to work through that period of discomfort with them, that could become a much more reasonable option.
I know a lot of people are hesitant to make the jump to the lethal option, but I'd rather have the lethal option and not need to go that far than to need to go that far and only have the pepper spray.
I PM'd you, and my offer still stands. If you want, I can reach out to some of my contacts out there for you. If you don't want me to, that's perfectly fine. At the end of the day, I just want what's best for you and your family!