Who is "real"?

[The rogue]

There was another thread where some of the people talked about being "real" online, and that we all sort of adopt a persona because we are relatively anonymous. I was just wondering if anyone thought that they were radically different online than they were in person? In the interest of letting that other thread die, I though I would make one of my first new threads....

It was odd that this was brought up right now, because I am working on becoming more "real" with people. We are a part of several 'social groups' where people are stereotypically "fake" and put on happy faces and generally make other people annoyed. I am trying to make more phone calls, go out to dinner with friends more often, and generally get "reconnected" with society in some meaningful way.

I have terminated my blog, mainly because it was becoming too static for me, lots of me talking to myself, like a pilot's diary. Except it was nowhere near as good at Ernest Gann! Sometimes, I bore myself. So I guess I will try to start a discussion with people here and see what happens. Hopefully some lively dynamic "conversation" among friends.

I think I am pretty much the same reclusive, opinionated, sarcastic, jerk of an airplane driver here as I am in real life. I have soaked up a lot of knowledge here, and commented rarely. I think in real life, people get more of the "opinionated" side of me, gotta work on listening more methinks. Sometimes I forget the words of a great philosopher: "It is better to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to speak and remove all doubt...."

So pilots, 'fess up now, who is a lion online and a mouse in person, who is a mouse online and a lion in real life, who is "the same"?

If I have offended you, you can go to....(just kidding!)

--Matt Rogers

Edit: Funny story: My user ID and avatar fairly accurately reflected the state of being that I was in when I started using this forum. I was in an interesting employment situation where I was going against the wishes of the boss in order to be safe, so I was, in essence, the Rogue Aviator with them because I wouldn't do what they told me. I still fly with aircrew safety in mind, and it has gotten me into a lot of "discussions" where I have flown, in two different states even! --mr

 

[tonycondon]

I like to think that I am the same on the board as in real life. I guess I'll have to default to the board members that have met me. I can say that after meeting many board members, they are pretty much the same in real life as on the board.

You find a job flying the atlantic yet Matt?

 

[The rogue]

Tony,
Thanks for weighing in on this one! I have found that we are a pretty "real" bunch as well, although I only know one other guy from here.
As for ferrying, I fired off an email, and haven't heard back yet. Thanks for reminding me, I need to make a call and talk to a "real" person tomorrow!
--Matt

 

[SCCutler]

I may be a jerk, but not on purpose. As I get older, I find it is way too much trouble to try to keep up with pretenses, so as I am, so shall I be. Like it, not, no matter to me.

Hey, that rhymed. Cool!

 

[Steve]

I'd have to defer to those that have met me IRL to answer that question.

 

[bkreager]

I'd like to think I'm the same here and in real life - talk a little and listen a lot.

 

[tonycondon]

IME, Ben, Steve, and Spike are spot on. In fact, I suspect that any of us who meet each other offline are basically the same online as off.

 

[The rogue]

Tony,
Thanks for the info. I was thinking that we are all pretty much who we say we are, or at least we try. It is refreshing, to say the least.
--Matt

 

[alaskaflyer]

Well, I don't make up any outrageous crap about myself, is that real enough? I have photos to back up everything I claim, except for the Marlon Richards thing, but I have witnesses!

Seriously,
At work I tend to be aggressive - a "D" on the disc chart. Sometimes I spout off when I shouldn't though age and experience has tempered that a bit. At home I am pretty well laid back and likable.

I think my presence online might reflect both sides of me.

I've always wondered what it would be like to make up a persona and post as him/her but frankly I don't think I have the creative personality for it.

One day I will return to the world from the frozen north and will be able to meet some more of you in person, preferably at Gastons. Some of you I have already met.

 

[Greg Bockelman]

What you see, read, hear, is what you get with me.

 

[JasonCT]

I actually think I am different in real life.
In real life I am shy, quiet and reserved. Kinda always been that way.
PoA allows me to "let me hair down" if you will, I have made some great virtual friends, made to feel welcomed, and enjoy the family feel to the place.
So in virtual world, PoA has made me quite gregarious.

 

[JRitt]

In real life it takes a bit before I will start interacting with people I do not know but once I do I don't shut up unless its a subject I know nothing about (like politics). Online I am more carefull not to say something that can be seen as the knowitall jerk that I really am.

 

[Let'sgoflying!]

I am a figment of my ego's own imagination. (!)


re one of Matt's comments;
Hey, what was that movie where someone is told they are about to die so they go around telling people in their life 'how it really is'.....and then discover they arent about to die?! I only heard about, it but I gotta see that one!

 

[SkyHog]

I'm not sure. I try not to be "internet badass" but I might come off that way.

In person, I'd like to think I'm a nice guy. I haven't been in a fight with anyone since I was in high school, and haven't been involved in someone else's fight since Jesse and I broke one up in Minneapolis...

 

[Greg Bockelman]

Hey, what was that movie where someone is told they are about to die so they go around telling people in their life 'how it really is'.....and then discover they arent about to die?! I only heard about, it but I gotta see that one!

Queen Latifah. "The Last Holiday." It was a good movie.

 

[JasonCT]

Queen Latifah was a good ....

Aren't you the pastor's husband?!

Couldn't resist Greg.

 

[flyingcheesehead]

I've met a lot of folks on here in the "real" world, quite unlike most online communities I've been a part of. That's probably because our favorite activity makes the world smaller - People here don't think anything of going hundreds of miles just to hang out for a few hours or thousands of miles for a weekend.

I can honestly say that I think most people on here are pretty much just how they are in the real world. Maybe the fact that I've met them colors how I view their posts online, though.

I think Spike is even funnier in real life. Steve is still a font of eclectic knowledge, but doesn't speak in URL's.

Personally, I think I'm a bit "louder" here than in real life, because I don't have to wait for others to finish speaking before I spout my viewpoint so my small brain doesn't constantly forget what I wanted to say by the time there's some dead space on the frequency.

I think the person who surprised me most was Jesse. When I first "met" him online, I thought he was an annoying, overconfident little punk. The first time I met him in person, I think he spoke about three words. I'm glad I've gotten to know him better, he's a nice guy and a pretty darn good pilot too. At least until his GPS breaks.

All in all, I've found the people here to be smart, thoughtful, kind, extremely generous, and just all around super cool.

 

[Greg Bockelman]

Aren't you the pastor's husband?!

Couldn't resist Greg.

LMAO. Yes, I am. What does that have to do with anything?

 

[JasonCT]

Touche Greg!

 

[AuntPeggy]

I'm real. My avatar reflects my own self-image more than the camera does.

 

[Bill]

I hope I'm that same as represented here. If anything, I'm a little more reserved face to face until my comfort level goes up some.

It IS interesting to have a picture of someone in your minds eye (for those that don't post their pictures in avitars), and then see how closely your minds eye (mis)matches the real person. In that way, most folks expect me to be older than I actually am.

I've met a good number of folks here on the board, and it has bee a great experience.

I've been a part of a couple of loosely grouped motorcycle communities for 14 years now, and although we only gather and ride several times a year, we've all become quite good friends, and seen spouses come and go, kids come into friends lives, just the general aging of the group. If the chemistry is good, it is fun to see the population evolve.

 

[Capflyer]

I think I'm more open in real life than here on the forum.
This is probably because read my posts a couple of times before I actually submit them and while doing that, I also make some changes and the "impulsive" statement/answer/question is not so impulsive anymore.

I guess you're gonna have to trust me...I am a funny guy!..

 

[tdager]

Basically what you read is what you get. For those that have met me, I am just as stunningly handsome and rich in person and I am on this message board!

JK.....I am who I am though, a complicated person who loves to laugh, cry, scream, smile, tell tall tales and little ones, agree, disagree, be true, and hypocritical....well you get the point.

I am who I am, regardless of the medium I present myself.

 

[CJones]

I *think* I am pretty much the same here as in 'real life'. I'm usually more quiet in a group until I get comfortable in the situation. So far, when I've met PoA'ers it's been on my turf (KAMW fly-ins) so I've started out on a higher comfort level than normal.

I suspect if I were to meet a bunch of folks at Gaston's or such, I would be fairly withdrawn from the group for a while.

Of course, having 'talked' to folks like Kent and Jesse on FlashChat, meeting them in person was easier to reach the level of 'comfort' where open sarcasm can abound.

Eh.. I dunno.. Guess you'll have to ask the few folks that I've actually met in real life.

Oh... And Tony is the same here, except in real life he has that weird hook for a hand and a peg leg that you can't see online.

 

[Frank Browne]

In the words of the immortal Popeye the Sailor Man...."I am what I am, and that's all that I am." Like Bill, I too tend to be somewhat reserved at first. And I just wouldn't really know how to create a personna separate from myself.
Brace yourselves. Here is a photo taken of my youngest son and I at the Florida Theater prior to the Leo Kottke concert Thursday evening.

 

[bluesky74656]

I'm much wittier in real life than I am online. Many times I'll have typed out a reply to a comment, then re-read it and think, "no, that's kind of stupid" and erase it. That kind of thing doesn't happen as much in real life.

I'm a philosophy major, which means I'm pretty good with essays and other forms of written communication. Somehow trying to post on a message board always makes me look like a bumbling idiot.

 

[GaryO]

In the words of the immortal Popeye the Sailor Man...."I am what I am, and that's all that I am." Like Bill, I too tend to be somewhat reserved at first. And I just wouldn't really know how to create a personna separate from myself.
Brace yourselves. Here is a photo taken of my youngest son and I at the Florida Theater prior to the Leo Kottke concert Thursday evening.

I think one of the problems with all types of remote communication is that people read things into statements which weren't intended.

I hate typing. So I tend to be very brief. That causes problems at work because people who don't know me mistake that brevity and read into it that I am mad.

I have found that, no matter how hard I try to avoid it, people tend to read some emotion into written words.

 

[Keith Lane]

I pretty much am the same here as anywhere else. I look a lot before I leap. Especially where there are clearly more knowledgable people discussing a topic. (that seems to be the case most of the time) I tend to be a story teller at work and with friends. I have done a wide variety of fairly wierd jobs (geophysical exploration, race car mechanic, computer mechanic, railroad consultant) in my lifetime and always seem to be recounting a funny or wierd story about my past experiences. I (lucky for you all) can't type for crap and it's sooo slow I couldn't do it online.

 

[ReverendSlappy]

I think I'm pretty much the same here as IRL. I'm also a pretty much "what you see is what you get" kind of guy, and above most things, I can't stand pretense. So I do my best to practice what I preach. Probably the biggest difference is that IRL, I tend to avoid contentious topics (such as politics) in the few occasions I have to openly discuss them, probably for two reasons: 1. Those kinds of conversations are hard work. They take serious thought, passion, and conviction, and when I'm not at work, I'm generally more interested in having conversations that don't require too much brain power. 2. I like to argue. I like it a lot. So if I get into a serious conversation of that nature, it's bound to last a long, long time.

Personally, I think I'm a bit "louder" here than in real life, because I don't have to wait for others to finish speaking before I spout my viewpoint so my small brain doesn't constantly forget what I wanted to say by the time there's some dead space on the frequency.

I think I'm kind of the same way. In regular conversation, I come across many situations where I think to myself, "Hey-- I have a lot to say about that!" and then I start trying to come up with a point and just run out of gas and let it go. Here, it's a lot different because I can organize my thoughts, and write them out pretty quickly (thank God I can type fast... I spend enough time here as it is ).

Also, I think online I'm a lot more susceptible to people who say/do things just to get a rise out of people. IRL, it's very easy for me to hear somebody say something inflammatory or unfair and just think to myself, "Wow, that's ridiculous," and just ignore whoever said whatever it was. Here, I just can't do that. For better or for worse.

But generally speaking, with the "Spin Zone" stuff, I write what I would say if I were talking in some kind of formal-ish debate, not over beers. I think stuff outside of that is more reflective of my general personality.

 

[Greebo]

In real life, I'm a 15 year old cheerleader at an all girls catholic school.

Wait, no, that was just my recurring dream...

I think I need to lay off the rye whiskey before bed...

 

[gismo]

I like to think that I am the same on the board as in real life. I guess I'll have to default to the board members that have met me. I can say that after meeting many board members, they are pretty much the same in real life as on the board.

You find a job flying the atlantic yet Matt?

Interestingly, a large majority of the pilots I've met in person after "meeting" them online have turned out to be "real" i.e. having the same personality in person as they do online. I'd say that Tony definitely falls squarely into that group as I suspect I do myself (could be wrong about me though, who really knows themselves that well).

 

[bstratt]

Interesting, I must be schizo! In real life I'm a very take charge, outspoken, run the organization, type of guy. In this community I tend to be somewhat laid back, almost reticent about voicing opinions. Although it may be due to a lack of confidence. I know what I know at work and am generally considered to be the expert, go-to guy, whereas here I realize how much I don't know and are therefore much more timid at giving opinions.

Many people think I have a different persona when I'm on the bike but that's really an image thing I think.

 

[ausrere]

In real life I'm much more opinionated and outspoken than online (on a wide variety of subjects), even though most people who know me will tell you I'm rather reserved and don't say much until I get to know the group.

I've gotten myself in to trouble more than once in my career by speaking up and voicing my opinion to the brass when I probably should have just shut up and not said a word. On the flip side, you could probably find a few supervisors who have a hard time remembering just who the heck I am.

Online, I'll gladly give my opinion on a topic when asked, but I only volunteer it on those that I feel like I have some expertise in. I tend to avoid heated topics (like politics) where in person I might be a little bit more vocal. I'm more of a "lurker" than not. I had an ex tell me once that I tend to sit back and observe for a long time until I think I've soaked in enough information to feel comfortable speaking out. I never realized it, but I think they were right. You guys just don't know how often I talk to the screen when I disagree with you and I don't post.

Overall, I think I'm pretty much the same on or off line though.

 

[Everskyward]

It IS interesting to have a picture of someone in your minds eye (for those that don't post their pictures in avitars), and then see how closely your minds eye (mis)matches the real person.

On that note I've gotta confess that I don't really have pointy ears, a pointy head perhaps...

 

[JasonCT]

Ahh Mari the truth is finally comes out!

 

[gkainz]

I regret to admit that I am an autoresponder. No one is home at this address.

 

[Lawreston]

I'm with the Popeye group, "I yam what I yam." Although my faces and voices may have multiple variances, what you see is what you get. I don't get too riled up about politics, lost loves, or T-shirts; and one day flows into the next.

HR

 

[alaskaflyer]

I'm with the Popeye group, "I yam what I yam." Although my faces and voices may have multiple variances, what you see is what you get. I don't get too riled up about politics, lost loves, or T-shirts; and one day flows into the next.

HR

LOL those are great photos. My mom sent me one once where she appeared to be in deep conversation with Woody Allen, after a trip to NYC. I almost flipped out!

 

[KennyFlys]

I don't want to bore you with my life as a SEAL Team member, SWAT Team member or my short career as a special agent with the FBI so I'll just tell the truth.

I'm your typical peon with a big mouth and very low tolerance for BS. That once got me removed me from consideration for a government accounting job. I never quite understood that!

Oh yeah, I like to drink Coke and get high.

Now, back to reading political posts by Slappy, Richard and Scott.

 

[ScottM]

In real life, I'm a 15 year old cheerleader at an all girls catholic school.

Wait, no, that was just my recurring dream...

I think I need to lay off the rye whiskey before bed...

thanks for that picture on my head. Just what I needed a drunk middle aged programmer in a cheerleader outfit passed out on the bed