You don't really believe middle school kids behave the same way in front of their parents as they do elsewhere, do you?They follow the examples they see. When parents use terrible language and then say, "don't cuss," what do you think the kids really learn?
This is a hard line to define. There's the "boys will be boys having fun" argument vs. the argument that some posts and images drive people, especially women, away.My point was just that I think it's interesting and a bit absurd how people choose to be offended by or find certain words vulgar, but aren't offended by or find certain images vulgar. Have just come to accept that's how it is here. I prefer not seeing softcore porn on this website, but its presence is abundant.
You don't really believe middle school kids behave the same way in front of their parents as they do elsewhere, do you?
That's true for second graders, but not middle school age kids. At that age, they are trying to draw distinctions from their parents. If that includes swearing to be "cool," it's gonna happen. Probably out of the parents' earshot if there is any consequence.No, I don't, but I believe kids have a tendency to act among their friends the same way their parents act in front of them.
Well you can see it plain as day in Class G. I've said **** there a bazillion times and nobody bats an eye. I said ******n once and someone's feelings were hurt.I just went back and read my big bad warning email and, you're right, it wasn't ass it was sht, with an "!" instead of an "i".
My point was just that I think it's interesting and a bit absurd how people choose to be offended by or find certain words vulgar, but aren't offended by or find certain images vulgar. Have just come to accept that's how it is here. I prefer not seeing softcore porn on this website, but its presence is abundant.
It is what it is. At the end of the day, I don't care.
Kids are a product of their environment that is very true, but as MAKG mentioned, they'll do what they need to for their peers to think they're "cool". I knew a girl in HS that come Saturday night would hang out at parties, puff the weed and drink like a fish. You think mama taught her that? Nope. Her mother and father are totally the opposite, but her peer group influenced her otherwise. A lot of kids live a double life, and it's a sad thing to witness young kids fall into.No, I don't, but I believe kids have a tendency to act among their friends the same way their parents act in front of them.
I prefer not seeing softcore porn on this website, but its presence is abundant.
I swear, but never around my kids. Moved to a new town late last year and I joke not, the kids on my street are tossing around the f-word like it's nothing. When I say kids, I mean children as young as 5. I caught one of them teaching my son how and when to say it, and put the fear of God in them accordingly. Funny how I'm now the only mom on the street the neighborhood kids respect. My son said it ONCE in my presence. Pretty sure it's the last time he'll make that mistake.
My goal is to raise a much smarter, polite and respectful person than I am. So far so good.
Made me think of this video that recently went viral :
I believe that is what most posters here go for, but not always achieve correctly. Its a fine line to get right. The best example I've seen to date was Sac Arrow's "Asian Dating" screenshot...
This is a hard line to define. There's the "boys will be boys having fun" argument vs. the argument that some posts and images drive people, especially women, away.
fireman smut?.....that photo didn't show their hoses.Agreed... that was funny!
Don't get me wrong - I'm not offended by any of it, I just get tired of seeing it all the time (or what seems like all the time lately). But whatever... it's pretty easy to just roll my eyes and scroll past, or click out and go look at my firemen smut.
fireman smut?.....that photo didn't show their hoses.
If we can just get them to the place where they realize that certain things are not appropriate at certain times and/or places, that's half the battle. It's a concept that seems to be beyond some people.Your son probably still swears, just not in your presence.
But that's really all we can hope for, teaching people not to swear in places where it is inappropriate or unwelcome. And the places where it is not appropriate changes over time.
"I assume she's into dead guys or something."We have a girl at work with a half naked poster of Patrick Swayze that's easily four feet tall above her desk. (I am not offended by it, but I assume she's into dead guys or something.)
I imagine if the gender of that particular staff member and their poster were reversed, the double standard would kick in and the world would be all drama-filled for an hour with bosses running around harrumphing and the personal posters would all come down, to make us all "happy" again.
Such is the way of the PC cult.
Yes, customers have seen it. No, nobody cares. Make that even a Marylyn Monroe poster and the indoctrinated fools would freak out.
We used to have an annual block party and invite the local FD to come over. Normally they'd park their truck and let kids of all ages climb on it. One year, they hooked to a hydrant and pulled out a hose, then made "new guy" do his thang. All the neighborhood moms lined up to take their turns on the nozzle with him behind them and his arms around them. It really was funny to watch.
Don't get me wrong - I'm not offended by any of it, I just get tired of seeing it all the time (or what seems like all the time lately). But whatever... it's pretty easy to just roll my eyes and scroll past, or click out and go look at my firemen smut.
If you inserted the phrase "pull the red handle," that describes exactly how I feel. Especially about the fireman smut part.
That's why you also manage their environment until they've demonstrated that they can manage it themselves.Kids are a product of their environment that is very true, but as MAKG mentioned, they'll do what they need to for their peers to think they're "cool". I knew a girl in HS that come Saturday night would hang out at parties, puff the weed and drink like a fish. You think mama taught her that? Nope. Her mother and father are totally the opposite, but her peer group influenced her otherwise. A lot of kids live a double life, and it's a sad thing to witness young kids fall into.
I would say that is a battle over manners, not morals. If you properly shape their morality, the manners are easy.If we can just get them to the place where they realize that certain things are not appropriate at certain times and/or places, that's half the battle. It's a concept that seems to be beyond some people.
I would say that is a battle over manners, not morals. If you properly shape their morality, the manners are easy.
Free range kids don't always work out so well.
I would say that is a battle over manners, not morals. If you properly shape their morality, the manners are easy.
No. Never attended a Catholic school and have only been to Mass once. I probably would disagree with some but not all of what they teach.Gotta get the conformity guilt trip going early or it doesn't stick.
You didn't perhaps attend Catholic school did you? LOL...
"If you back talk the authority figure, you're going to hell... you know that, right?"
No. Never attended a Catholic school and have only been to Mass once. I probably would disagree with some but not all of what they teach.
Conformity guilt trip?? That must be something in your experience, not mine. I said "shape their morality", I didn't say how. Did you shape your kids morality or did you let their environment do it?
To kind of restate my point a different way, if everyone's morals are different their manners are likely to be as well. Convincing someone of right manners is difficult if they are on a different page morally.Everyone's morals are different. Mine might be different than yours but that does not make them wrong. I see nothing wrong with using certain words in various contexts that others would not use at all. There are way too many uptight people in this world.
Umm, good luck with that.That's why you also manage their environment until they've demonstrated that they can manage it themselves.
I should have added, I did watch a movie about Catholic school called "Heaven Can Wait". It was a good movie at the time. I think it gave me a pretty good idea of what you're getting at. Honestly though, as rigid and arbitrary as it seems as a kid, it probably was much better than what kids are getting now.Haha I think you may have missed the humor. Plus you need some old friends who did attend those schools in the days of whacking the students with rulers to get it. They'll agree they were more scared of the nuns whacking them than of cussing.
As far as the kid thing goes, nature knew better than to let me raise any.
Picking their friends for them is a big part of managing their environment. And, it is very achievable. If done properly, it will more likely lead them to thank you rather than curse you.Umm, good luck with that.
You can manage a preschooler's environment. Not a middle schooler's. FAR too many variables you just don't have control over. Unless you pick your kid's friends for him....and then try to figure out how to get him to forgive you.
Picking their friends for them is a big part of managing their environment. And, it is very achievable. If done properly, it will more likely lead them to thank you rather than curse you.
If you aren't able pick your 10yr old's friends, you are falling short of your parental responsibilities.You can't pick a 10 year old's friends unless you manage every moment of every day. You probably can't do that even if you do manage every minute; they will defy you. I met a few products of that type of helicopter upbringing when I was in college. They were not well adjusted people, and most of them had very serious problems adapting to life outside the helicopter environment.
If you aren't able pick your 10yr old's friends, you are falling short of your parental responsibilities.