Visiting Nordic Countries (Norway/Sweden/Finland)

[mtuomi]

??? How do you conclude this?

IMHO, restaurant service in the U.S. is superior. That is the free market at its best.

So, how often you use your right to control that market and refuse to tip at all?

In the states, I've done that once (for details - I complained to the waiter about my steak being overdone, he said he'll talk to the kitchen about it. Nothing happened. After dinner he came to pick up the plates and asked how the food was, completely ignoring the fact that I still had half a steak on the table. I said no I wasn't very pleased, he said Ok and walked away).

In Europe, I would eat elsewhere next time. This threat makes the restaurant managers assess the performance of their waitstaff much closer, and reward the ones that are good and get rid of the ones that aren't. In the US, if a waiter is simply average, he prob still makes the 15% per table. In Europe, he will be fired. The difference is, in Europe the burden of controlling their performance is on the restaurant managers. The way to adjust for poor performance is to ask for the manager, and complaining about it.

The range of adjusting for service isn't that big in the US. You tip less than 10% pretty much only if the waiter spits at you, and you don't tip above 20% unless they, well, I don't know, provide some other services or whatever. These are obviously generalizations, but you get the idea I'm sure.

I agree, the service on average is better, if you want efficient service. but for a chilled out dinner, I prefer the European style. I don't like the constant "can I fill that up for you honey". Besides, you learn to get the waiters attention, it's a form of art Again, different culture. What you appreciate is highly subjective.

 

[Jay Honeck]

Why would you want somebody to feign happiness to see you, a total stranger?

That is a strange dynamic where you want people to pretend to be happy to see you when they have never seen you in your life, just to try and get a couple of more dollars out of your pocket. That's the job of a hooker, not a waitress.

Next time you are in Europe, see if you can eat at the same place multiple times, and watch how it changes. Be friendly, talk to them about their business, ask about them. By the third time, they are genuinely happy to see you because they like you.

(Works best in mom and pop establishments far off the Guided Tour / McHotel types of places).

I don't expect cartwheels, but a pleasant, welcoming attitude is the bare minimum I expect from a service worker.

We train our desk staff and housekeepers to smile and say "Good afternoon!" to everyone. If they don't, they get a talking-to.

 

[mtuomi]

Why would you want somebody to feign happiness to see you, a total stranger?

That is a strange dynamic where you want people to pretend to be happy to see you when they have never seen you in your life, just to try and get a couple of more dollars out of your pocket. That's the job of a hooker, not a waitress.

Next time you are in Europe, see if you can eat at the same place multiple times, and watch how it changes. Be friendly, talk to them about their business, ask about them. By the third time, they are genuinely happy to see you because they like you.

(Works best in mom and pop establishments far off the Guided Tour / McHotel types of places).

Quoted for truth.

An example - most Europeans _HATE_ the American(and English too) "Hey how are you" and walking off without even listening you say something back

Let's say in France. Try saying ça va? and walking off without hearing at least the same back. Highly insulting.

When in Rome.

 

[mtuomi]

I don't expect cartwheels, but a pleasant, welcoming attitude is the bare minimum I expect from a service worker.

We train our desk staff and housekeepers to smile and say "Good afternoon!" to everyone. If they don't, they get a talking-to.

What you consider pleasant and welcoming varies massively depending on which culture you are in.

In some African countries, waitstaff who say "Good afternoon" to patrons would get fired on the spot.

 

[Jay Honeck]

What you consider pleasant and welcoming varies massively depending on which culture you are in.

In some African countries, waitstaff who say "Good afternoon" to patrons would get fired on the spot.

Bitter and surly seems to be cross-cultural. In the absence of friendly and outgoing, I would accept deference.

But, frankly, I don't care if waitstaff are nice or happy. I just want a damned beer!

 

[mtuomi]

Bitter and surly seems to be cross-cultural. In the absence of friendly and outgoing, I would accept deference.

But, frankly, I don't care if waitstaff are nice or happy. I just want a damned beer!

Bitter and surly waitstaff, you need to eat at better restaurants

 

[airdale]

My guess is that the OP has left the room.

 

[weilke]

Our friend in Vienna (an Austrian citizen who now spends several months each year living in the U.S.) also pointed out the difference in demeanor between American and European waitstaff. Until then, we hadn't noticed, but she pointed out how surly and unhappy-looking the waitstaff was at the restaurant she took us to. Looking back on it, I don't think we met a single waitress/waiter who feigned happiness or appreciation. Her comment was that this would never be tolerated in America -- and she's right.

Not sure what you did to **** off the waitstaff. That just hasn't been my experience. Sure, you get crappy service here and there, but that's no different from the US.

Again, there are just differences in customs that if you dont know them can be perceived as rude. Except for some really fru-fru places with white table cloths, it is entirely acceptable to call for a waiter if you want another drink or the bill. If you dont call, they wont come.

 

[weilke]

An example - most Europeans _HATE_ the American(and English too) "Hey how are you" and walking off without even listening you say something back

Lol, during one of my first trips to the US, my host picked me up at SFO and made the mistake of asking 'so how was your trip ?'. I did NOT know that the only acceptable answer to 'so how was your trip?' is 'fine!'. I was at the end of 20hrs of flying with several connections and pretty miserable at this point, so I told her what I thought about Northwest airlines and the seat-pitch in their DC9s She did not see that one coming.