Thinking about getting my wife a birthday present rant

Guessing what your spouse (or any person in your life for that matter) wants as a gift is about the least fun aspect of gift giving because it gives nearly everyone a complex and usually ends up in some form of disappointment.

In the early parts of my relationship and marriage with my husband, I wanted him to come up with gift ideas on his own.

These days, I make lists (with links directly to the thing, experience, etc.) and just e-mail him. Sometimes it’s wildly expensive things I have wanted but would never purchase for myself because I just can’t bring myself to do that (LV purse) and sometimes it’s as simple as some small things for the kitchen. I think he’s simply thankful that I have him some direction. I also stopped expecting people to guess what I wanted - it doesn’t work in my career, so why have expectations that it work at home?

Some of my favorite gifts have been silly coffee mugs (world’s best mom when I became a mom, and a sectional mug with the airport where I did my first solo, etc.) with personal meaning.

If you have children, and even if you do not, Maya Brenner makes some beautiful necklaces (delicate, not over the top) that can be customized with initials and birthstones. It’s high on my list for a Mother’s Day gift. Hope this helps!
 
Are there chores that she does but doesn't relish doing? do some of them for her (extra points for picking chores that you hate to do)... at least for a while. Of course, that won't work if you won't do them" correctly".

Hah! That's the main benefit of agreeing to do chores that you don't do correctly - you never get asked to do them again. Example - I cannot load the dishwasher to my wife's satisfaction, past the very basic stuff like silverware and glasses and plates. Anything else, she ends up rearranging. After 16 years of this, I am finally on dishwasher-loading probation and am not even allowed to try to put those odd-sized or shaped items in there. Win! :D

As far as gifts, any more we just tell each other what we want. It's so much easier, less stressful and makes the event (Christmas, birthday, etc.) much more fun.
 
We ended up going out to a late lunch then seeing a movie my kid wanted to see. The day before, I let my kid pick out something for her... turns out kid was out shopping with mom the other day and mom saw some storage containers she liked. Kid overheard mom talking about the containers, but mom never bought them for some reason. All kid wanted was to get mom these silly containers. When mom opened them up she was happy... Silly gift and she could have easily bought them for herself, but meant something to her since kiddo remembered that she wanted them.

Probably best birthday present for my wife was me taking kid out of town to NC for a golf academy for the rest of the week. She got four days of peace and quiet.

All parties who responded win. Prizes will be handed out at whatever fly-in/lunch is scheduled this week that I cannot attend since my master/alt switch is out of the airplane.
 
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