Your first point is exactly where I was going with it. In my industry, when times get tough (as they have been of late), we might be asked to take a certain cut to our day rate. The problem is, I have no idea if they are
selectively asking people to take a cut or making that change across the board. I could ask the head honcho, but who knows if I'm getting an honest answer? Being conditioned to feel like we're doing something wrong by asking or discussing it openly is not a good thing for anyone but the person writing the checks.
I just can't get on board with openly discussing my salary with anyone that ISN'T in my field or industry, though. I don't care how close of a friend they are. It's not their business. I mean, in conversation I can see saying something like, "Oh yeah, it's been a good week. Managed to get little raise, so I'm celebrating with a drink." Overall, though, as
@schmookeeg stated earlier, "Never let a man know you have a nickel more than he does" is pretty solid advice. I have a decent house. I fly (obviously). I have a somewhat unique automobile. My friends and acquaintances can either surmise that I'm doing OK financially or they can assume I'm in debt up to my eyeballs. As much as I love my close friends, they'd be swiftly rebuffed if they asked for any details on that matter.