EppyGA
Touchdown! Greaser!
So sorry Nate. I hate losing pets even when we know they don't live forever. I feel your pain sir. Remember the good days.
Pup is sick
- Thread starter denverpilot
- Start date
So sorry Nate. I hate losing pets even when we know they don't live forever. I feel your pain sir. Remember the good days.
woodstock
Final Approach
Awwwww. Really sorry to hear that. I know your last days with her were very special. She lived a good long life, and for a big dog, too.
pilot_dude
En-Route
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pilot_dude
Condolences, Nate. I've been there more times than I care to admit and it is never easy. My empathy runs deep.
TangoWhiskey
Touchdown! Greaser!
Aw, man, sorry I saw this AFTER the fact... you gave Ebby the best thing a dog can have--a good and loving home. You'll remember her for years.
We lost Snickers to old age last November... still miss her deeply. She still looked great, right up to the end. I know what you mean by the "increase in white hairs." Here's her enjoying the front yard on 9-15-2011:
We lost Snickers to old age last November... still miss her deeply. She still looked great, right up to the end. I know what you mean by the "increase in white hairs." Here's her enjoying the front yard on 9-15-2011:
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masloki
Pattern Altitude
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Nunya
Very sorry to hear of your loss. I wish you and your family strength during this tough time. Here is a poem I found that has helped take a little of the pain away in this situation for myself.
The Rainbow Bridge
inspired by a Norse legend
By the edge of a woods, at the foot of a hill,
Is a lush, green meadow where time stands still.
Where the friends of man and woman do run,
When their time on earth is over and done.
For here, between this world and the next,
Is a place where each beloved creature finds rest.
On this golden land, they wait and they play,
Till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.
No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness,
For here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness.
Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,
Their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.
They romp through the grass, without even a care,
Until one day they start, and sniff at the air.
All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,
Then all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.
For just at that instant, their eyes have met;
Together again, both person and pet.
So they run to each other, these friends from long past,
The time of their parting is over at last.
The sadness they felt while they were apart,
Has turned into joy once more in each heart.
They embrace with a love that will last forever,
And then, side-by-side, they cross over… together.
The Rainbow Bridge
inspired by a Norse legend
By the edge of a woods, at the foot of a hill,
Is a lush, green meadow where time stands still.
Where the friends of man and woman do run,
When their time on earth is over and done.
For here, between this world and the next,
Is a place where each beloved creature finds rest.
On this golden land, they wait and they play,
Till the Rainbow Bridge they cross over one day.
No more do they suffer, in pain or in sadness,
For here they are whole, their lives filled with gladness.
Their limbs are restored, their health renewed,
Their bodies have healed, with strength imbued.
They romp through the grass, without even a care,
Until one day they start, and sniff at the air.
All ears prick forward, eyes dart front and back,
Then all of a sudden, one breaks from the pack.
For just at that instant, their eyes have met;
Together again, both person and pet.
So they run to each other, these friends from long past,
The time of their parting is over at last.
The sadness they felt while they were apart,
Has turned into joy once more in each heart.
They embrace with a love that will last forever,
And then, side-by-side, they cross over… together.
wsuffa
Touchdown! Greaser!
kimberlyanne546
Final Approach
This is so sad. Sorry for your loss.
Nate, so sorry to hear about Ebony. You were lucky to have found each other and I know you did right by her.
gkainz
Final Approach
Condolences to you and Karen, Nate. It's not much, but I understand where you're at.
I liked the "Rainbow Bridge" post.
I liked the "Rainbow Bridge" post.
So sorry for your loss. It is always so hard.
We had to put down our beloved Springer Spaniel last year at the age of 14. He was still a happy and loving dog even as he became blind and deaf. When he started to fall down and not be able get himself up, we knew it was time, he just wasn't having fun any more. I always thought he would would let us know when he was ready, by stopping eating or something, but I think due to his sense of duty to his family he wasn't going to give up. In the end, it was up to us to do the right thing for him.
It took us over a year, but we finally got a new puppy last month. As much as I wanted to, my wife could just not bring herself to get another Springer. We got ourselves a beautiful little mutt from the Humane Society. Maybe it's too early to tell, but I think she's going to be a great one too.
We had to put down our beloved Springer Spaniel last year at the age of 14. He was still a happy and loving dog even as he became blind and deaf. When he started to fall down and not be able get himself up, we knew it was time, he just wasn't having fun any more. I always thought he would would let us know when he was ready, by stopping eating or something, but I think due to his sense of duty to his family he wasn't going to give up. In the end, it was up to us to do the right thing for him.
It took us over a year, but we finally got a new puppy last month. As much as I wanted to, my wife could just not bring herself to get another Springer. We got ourselves a beautiful little mutt from the Humane Society. Maybe it's too early to tell, but I think she's going to be a great one too.
TMetzinger
Final Approach
Sorry, Nate.
cavmedic
Line Up and Wait
Awe man, sorry ........... I hate reading things like this
I had a customer slamming his pup the other day right on top of its spine above its hips so hard the dog was yelping. ( because the dog was excited that the cable guy came to see HIM , and he jumped up, gave me a big hug and kisses)
I was so ****ed that I told the customer about himself. Of course I got the excuse of the wife left blah blah blah ( I wonder why she split) .
After I told him to NEVER touch his dog like that again because despite all the BS , that dog will be there for you no matter what. I think he got the hint when I was done tearing into him. Unprofessional on my part, absolutely , but when it comes to something like that , I will tell a customer off.
I have an abused rescue , and the dog cant be trusted because of it
( scars on my face to prove it) , but he is still my buddy despite of it all.
I had a customer slamming his pup the other day right on top of its spine above its hips so hard the dog was yelping. ( because the dog was excited that the cable guy came to see HIM , and he jumped up, gave me a big hug and kisses)
I was so ****ed that I told the customer about himself. Of course I got the excuse of the wife left blah blah blah ( I wonder why she split) .
After I told him to NEVER touch his dog like that again because despite all the BS , that dog will be there for you no matter what. I think he got the hint when I was done tearing into him. Unprofessional on my part, absolutely , but when it comes to something like that , I will tell a customer off.
I have an abused rescue , and the dog cant be trusted because of it
( scars on my face to prove it) , but he is still my buddy despite of it all.
AdamZ
Touchdown! Greaser!
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Adam Zucker
Tough day sorry Nate!
Skylane81E
Final Approach
Giving my pack an extra scratch tonight.
timwinters
Ejection Handle Pulled
May I go now?
Do you think the time is right?
May I say good-bye to pain-filled days
and endless lonely nights?
I've lived my life and done my best,
an example tried to be.
So can I take that step beyond
and set my spirit free?
I didn't want to go at first,
I fought with all my might.
But something seems to draw me now
to a warm and loving light.
I want to go. I really do.
It's difficult to stay.
But I will try as best I can
to live just one more day.
To give you time to care for me
and share your love and fears.
I know you're sad and afraid,
because I see your tears.
I'll not be far, I promise that,
and hope you'll always know
that my spirit will be close to you
wherever you may go.
Thank you so for loving me.
You know I love you, too.
That's why it's hard to say good-bye
and end this life with you.
So hold me now just one more time
and let me hear you say,
because you care so much for me,
you'll let me go today.
Susan A. Jackson
Do you think the time is right?
May I say good-bye to pain-filled days
and endless lonely nights?
I've lived my life and done my best,
an example tried to be.
So can I take that step beyond
and set my spirit free?
I didn't want to go at first,
I fought with all my might.
But something seems to draw me now
to a warm and loving light.
I want to go. I really do.
It's difficult to stay.
But I will try as best I can
to live just one more day.
To give you time to care for me
and share your love and fears.
I know you're sad and afraid,
because I see your tears.
I'll not be far, I promise that,
and hope you'll always know
that my spirit will be close to you
wherever you may go.
Thank you so for loving me.
You know I love you, too.
That's why it's hard to say good-bye
and end this life with you.
So hold me now just one more time
and let me hear you say,
because you care so much for me,
you'll let me go today.
Susan A. Jackson
Gmanattack
Filing Flight Plan
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Gmanattack
Nate,
I'm very sorry for your loss. Ebony's soul will forever be grateful for the love and care you showed her.
--Gunjan
I'm very sorry for your loss. Ebony's soul will forever be grateful for the love and care you showed her.
--Gunjan
Swampfox201
Line Up and Wait
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Todd W.
A quote I saw once says it best "dogs aren't our whole life but they make our life whole"
Sorry for your loss Nate.
Sorry for your loss Nate.
GigEm98
Filing Flight Plan
So sorry for your loss. RIP Ebony
silver-eagle
En-Route
Condolences Nate. Eb was very lucky to have found you.
Been there. Not ashamed to admit I shed a tear or two for you all. Dogs know a lot, and I imagine Eb was telling you, "Good Bye" on the sofa. Good memories.
I still see Dixie wandering around the house, and she's ten years gone. Pups have a way of doing that to you.
Valentine the Wonder Rat Dog (an old one in her own right) flies just fine (although with her arthritis, we have to help her in now). Curls up and sleeps until we're descending to land, when she wakes up and watches out the window. It has been said that, how a dogs in a car is a pretty good predictor of how they'll bee in a plane and, except for the nose in the wind part, I find that true.
Don't worry about finding another dog, because looking would feel like cheating on Eb. But another pup will find you, and the circle will continue as it should.
I raise a glass in remembrance of Eb, and proclaim: "Good Dog!"
I still see Dixie wandering around the house, and she's ten years gone. Pups have a way of doing that to you.
Valentine the Wonder Rat Dog (an old one in her own right) flies just fine (although with her arthritis, we have to help her in now). Curls up and sleeps until we're descending to land, when she wakes up and watches out the window. It has been said that, how a dogs in a car is a pretty good predictor of how they'll bee in a plane and, except for the nose in the wind part, I find that true.
Don't worry about finding another dog, because looking would feel like cheating on Eb. But another pup will find you, and the circle will continue as it should.
I raise a glass in remembrance of Eb, and proclaim: "Good Dog!"
nddons
Touchdown! Greaser!
I'm sorry, Nate. I assume the vet was compassionate about this. My daughter the vet student has already been through a few dozen of these, and a cow as well this summer. It's not easy on them.
As to the cow, it had to be put down. When they did that, the head farm hand, a hispanic man in his late 30's, was crying. He then asked my daughter and the female vet why they weren't crying. They said it was hard, but that they had their job to do to save the animal from excruciating pain. They both teared up as they drove away and back to the clinic. It was a quite ride.
You and your wife are dog people. I hope another pup has the great fortune to live with you both.
As to the cow, it had to be put down. When they did that, the head farm hand, a hispanic man in his late 30's, was crying. He then asked my daughter and the female vet why they weren't crying. They said it was hard, but that they had their job to do to save the animal from excruciating pain. They both teared up as they drove away and back to the clinic. It was a quite ride.
You and your wife are dog people. I hope another pup has the great fortune to live with you both.
Jeanie
Pattern Altitude
Hi Nate,
How wonderful that you and Eb had a good life together! I'm sorry that letting her go is so painful, but you will always have your memories of her. I had to have my April put down a couple of months ago. Multiple tumors which arose rapidly. I still look out for her or expect her to wander in every now and then. She was with me for 12 yrs.
Dogs are some of the best parts of our lives. As much as it hurts to let one go I can't imagine living without one.
When my mom was dying I asked her what she thought it might be like "on the other side" and she said she had no idea but she hoped she got to see all her favorite dogs.
Best to you and Karen.
How wonderful that you and Eb had a good life together! I'm sorry that letting her go is so painful, but you will always have your memories of her. I had to have my April put down a couple of months ago. Multiple tumors which arose rapidly. I still look out for her or expect her to wander in every now and then. She was with me for 12 yrs.
Dogs are some of the best parts of our lives. As much as it hurts to let one go I can't imagine living without one.
When my mom was dying I asked her what she thought it might be like "on the other side" and she said she had no idea but she hoped she got to see all her favorite dogs.
Best to you and Karen.
Keith Lane
Pattern Altitude
Sounds like she was luck to have you and you were lucky to have her. I'll admit to shedding a tear just reading this entire thread.
Also I think we are lucky as a group that you feel comfortable enough to share what was a difficult time with us. In a world where internet forums exhibit staggering amounts of vitriol, this discussion shows that inside we are all really humans behind the keyboards.
Also I think we are lucky as a group that you feel comfortable enough to share what was a difficult time with us. In a world where internet forums exhibit staggering amounts of vitriol, this discussion shows that inside we are all really humans behind the keyboards.
denverpilot
Tied Down
Thanks Keith. I will admit, if I "adopt" a particular online hideout, I usually just try to be myself and make friends there. I wouldn't have posted if I didn't like y'all quite a bit.
Found a CFII here who helped me through my Instrument Rating, met a number of folks at events in-person over the last few years, and generally can't say there's anyone here I would not want to meet.
There's some I don't always agree with, and they not me, but that's just normal.
I'd meet up with anyone here at least once.
Sac might tell me I couldn't use the treadmill next to him at the gym, though.
kimberlyanne546
Final Approach
Thanks Keith. I will admit, if I "adopt" a particular online hideout, I usually just try to be myself and make friends there. I wouldn't have posted if I didn't like y'all quite a bit.
Found a CFII here who helped me through my Instrument Rating, met a number of folks at events in-person over the last few years, and generally can't say there's anyone here I would not want to meet.
There's some I don't always agree with, and they not me, but that's just normal.
I'd meet up with anyone here at least once.
Sac might tell me I couldn't use the treadmill next to him at the gym, though.
I've met many good friends through POA (in person, over the phone, and through email). I've flown with many POAers (and put many of them in my plane). I credit this site for me even making it through to the point of getting my PPL. We are all friends.
david.h
Pre-takeoff checklist
Hello-
I know I just joined a few months ago, haven't really introduced myself, and rarely post. But this is really hitting home with me, and I feel for your loss Nate.
I had a beautiful blue heeler, Chelsea, that I had to put down last Friday. She was with us for over 14 years and was my dog. Heelers are "follow me" dogs and bond with one person, and when I laid eyes on her I knew she was my dog. We rescued her from tied up to a tree with no fence, the owner was a marine who was to be stationed in Hawaii for 2 years and his parents didn't have a place to keep her. She found us (got loose from the tree and wandered to us), we found the owners, and they said to give her a nice home.
Over the last year she has been getting stiffer in her rear hips and having issues with bladder control. Last week she stumbled twice and quit bringing the ball at dinner time.
Anyways, one of the toughest days of my life. My wife and I took the afternoon off and went together. We had gotten her when we were only dating for a few months.
She loved to work, and work she did. Chase the ball/stick/swim/herd cattle was what she lived for. I took her out to my friend's ranch several times and she'd help round up the cows and goats, his uncle said she was the best herding dog he'd ever seen. Never trained, just instinct. She was beautiful watching her run.
Now she's gone and all we have are photos and memories. But those will do until we're together again. The love of a dog is terribly beautiful, the end almost always guaranteed to be us outliving them.
OK, enough tears for tonight, I made it through most of this week ok but reading this thread has made rivers down my cheeks. We had a family reunion this week and today was the first day I had internet again.
Sorry for your loss, sorry to spill my guts on your thread, and thanks to all the nice folks here to share it with.
David
I know I just joined a few months ago, haven't really introduced myself, and rarely post. But this is really hitting home with me, and I feel for your loss Nate.
I had a beautiful blue heeler, Chelsea, that I had to put down last Friday. She was with us for over 14 years and was my dog. Heelers are "follow me" dogs and bond with one person, and when I laid eyes on her I knew she was my dog. We rescued her from tied up to a tree with no fence, the owner was a marine who was to be stationed in Hawaii for 2 years and his parents didn't have a place to keep her. She found us (got loose from the tree and wandered to us), we found the owners, and they said to give her a nice home.
Over the last year she has been getting stiffer in her rear hips and having issues with bladder control. Last week she stumbled twice and quit bringing the ball at dinner time.
Anyways, one of the toughest days of my life. My wife and I took the afternoon off and went together. We had gotten her when we were only dating for a few months.
She loved to work, and work she did. Chase the ball/stick/swim/herd cattle was what she lived for. I took her out to my friend's ranch several times and she'd help round up the cows and goats, his uncle said she was the best herding dog he'd ever seen. Never trained, just instinct. She was beautiful watching her run.
Now she's gone and all we have are photos and memories. But those will do until we're together again. The love of a dog is terribly beautiful, the end almost always guaranteed to be us outliving them.
OK, enough tears for tonight, I made it through most of this week ok but reading this thread has made rivers down my cheeks. We had a family reunion this week and today was the first day I had internet again.
Sorry for your loss, sorry to spill my guts on your thread, and thanks to all the nice folks here to share it with.
David
Everskyward
Experimenter
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- Mar 19, 2005
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Everskyward
Late to this thread. Sorry about Ebony. She was lucky to have such great parents. You did the right thing.
Geico266
Touchdown! Greaser!
Good call. She was a great dog that you gave life to after she was abandon for who know what reasons.
I believe a man is measure by how well he cares for the animals in his care. You sir, have added a note on your resume that speaks very highly of your character as a man.
Thank you for sharing your story.
denverpilot
Tied Down
More than happy to share in your grief and read your story, David. Maybe fate had you drop by here at PoA.
Was just giving a couple of photos a good long look myself. Kinda "before" and "after" shots. One where she was very young and one taken Tuesday. The differences in aging are stunning when they're side by side.
Your heeler sounds like a great dog and needed you too. We're just caretakers of them for a short while, and then they run on home.
Peace to you and yours. And again everyone, thanks for sharing your stories. It made it all easier for both Karen and I.
Some may find our humor a little rough, and/or too soon, but when the car limped back up the street to the driveway and Karen came in needing a ride to her meet-up, I said, "I wish we could have put that car down instead. What do you think?"
And we both burst into laughter.
Was just giving a couple of photos a good long look myself. Kinda "before" and "after" shots. One where she was very young and one taken Tuesday. The differences in aging are stunning when they're side by side.
Your heeler sounds like a great dog and needed you too. We're just caretakers of them for a short while, and then they run on home.
Peace to you and yours. And again everyone, thanks for sharing your stories. It made it all easier for both Karen and I.
Some may find our humor a little rough, and/or too soon, but when the car limped back up the street to the driveway and Karen came in needing a ride to her meet-up, I said, "I wish we could have put that car down instead. What do you think?"
And we both burst into laughter.
Nate , David and all the pet lovers.....
Our fur friends get attached to us as strong as we get attached to them... The bond is something that is next to impossible to explain. I have had St Bernards most of my life and they are short lived, which is a cruel fate to such a loyal and loving breed. To all those who still have a pet, give them a extra pat tonight because one day, you too will be in Nate and Davids shoes...
..I, kinda like Nate, use laughter to get over bad times. Seems inapproaite but it works for me too.......
Ps. Nate, I did check and putting down Karens car would have drawn the ire of the " Sociaty For The Prevention Of Cruelty To Volkswagons" so it is good you didn't follow through on clearly what needed to be done to the poor car.
..Peaco out there guys and gals...
Ben.
Geico266
Touchdown! Greaser!
It is tough dealing with end of life issues for pets. Glad you guys are finding a little humor in it. It is a good thing in my book.
My wife and I were wondering if our kids will "Do the right thing" when it is time for us to move on.
Can they do that? 
My mom had to make the call on our family cat that was 22 years old. When I asked her why she said "The cat had out lived it's usefulness" . A couple of months later she was not feeling well and was taking it easy. I asked her if she was still useful.
mom was NOT amused. . She cut me out of her will.
My wife and I were wondering if our kids will "Do the right thing" when it is time for us to move on.
Can they do that? My mom had to make the call on our family cat that was 22 years old. When I asked her why she said "The cat had out lived it's usefulness" . A couple of months later she was not feeling well and was taking it easy. I asked her if she was still useful.
mom was NOT amused. . She cut me out of her will.
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woodstock
Final Approach
Nate , David and all the pet lovers.....
Our fur friends get attached to us as strong as we get attached to them... The bond is something that is next to impossible to explain. I have had St Bernards most of my life and they are short lived, which is a cruel fate to such a loyal and loving breed. To all those who still have a pet, give them a extra pat tonight because one day, you too will be in Nate and Davids shoes...
I, kinda like Nate, use laughter to get over bad times. Seems inapproaite but it works for me too.......
Ps. Nate, I did check and putting down Karens car would have drawn the ire of the " Sociaty For The Prevention Of Cruelty To Volkswagons" so it is good you didn't follow through on clearly what needed to be done to the poor car.
Peaco out there guys and gals...
Ben.
My Mom used to raise and show St Bernards - by the time I was a teenager she wasn't active anymore, and when our last St. Bernard died, they moved over to Black Labs... they are wonderful dogs, and yes, they do die way too young. One of ours (my first dog, ever) died at age 8 - can't remember what the problem was, it wasn't old age - and while I can't remember the ages of the others it wasn't like they lived well into their teens.
TangoWhiskey
Touchdown! Greaser!
Which breed are you saying dies young? The Bernards or labs?
woodstock
Final Approach
St. Bernards.
Agreed......
The St Bernard breed is rather young and the genetics have not been able to produce a heart large enough to sustain the size of the dog....
Talk is that it will take another 80-100 generations or 60 or so years till evolution will increase the hearts size to let the breed have a basically normal life span....
They are GREAT dogs..
denverpilot
Tied Down
Sorry to pop this up on the topic list again, but some interesting notes and thoughts since our pup headed West...
- Sounds in the house: It's amazing how hearing a pop or creak from the wood floors upstairs will trigger one to think the dog woke up from a nap on the rug and is headed downstairs -- for a brief moment. Then no more noises and the rational brain kicks back in.
- Doors: After 16 years with one pet and 21.5 with another, when they're gone you find yourself either standing at a door wondering why they're not coming inside, or looking before you close -- to make sure you're not smacking a buddy in the nose. Weird FO catch yourself doing it.
- Smell: The house smells different. You both miss it, and don't. More miss than don't. I even miss bad dog breath.
- Other people's dogs: They (rightly) shy away from you at first, and you're taken aback a bit by it. The neighbor's new Weimeraner is particularly skittish but he's coming around. He'll figure out that I'm friend, not foe, soon enough. He's only 5 months old. Growing like a weed.
- Stuff: The dry food big sealed plastic container is still parked next to the fridge. There's a bag each of rawhide chips and bones next to it. It almost feels wrong just to throw them out. (I did toss a rawhide to the neighbor's dogs one night when they were riled up and he wasn't home to give them something else to do.) They may go to the aforementioned 5 month old's house here soon. The food and water bowl were too much though, and they're out in one of the garages, along with a big kennel/crate and a few other things. The leash and collar are still in the back of the Yukon.
- Wildlife: We've got a lot more bunnies, wandering cats, squirrels, and other critters wandering through and around the backyard now, or just blatantly sitting in it watching us. You half expect and think, "You're going to be running soon!" and expect to see a bolt of black fur go by out the back door. Then it doesn't happen and you instead ponder how weird it is that you still think it's going to happen, and watch the critter for a while. I've been attempting to count how many rabbits are in the family under the bushes. I knew they liked our bushes because the dog in her last couple of years would walk them out of her yard slowly but not really chase and frighten them, and also relalized that her presence meant other critters didn't come into the yard looking for a bunny-snack. That balance is broken, so I'm expecting a natural depletion of bunnies one of these nights by something... Coyote, dogs, not sure what will get to them first.
- Surfing: You peek at dog rescue sites and look at all the pups that need a home and think about it, then click that one link that brings up your pup's doppelgänger and have to close the browser. Nope, not ready yet at all. No. Eventually yes. But not today.
And an interesting thought from dad today when we were talking about it. I shared that I'd kinda cleared my schedule of all the busywork and volunteer stuff the last couple of weekends and just hung out, reassessing, thinking... Job, life, plans... All the stuff you think about after a personal loss.
We had to drive out to the county to return the Suburban today, and we were standing outside enjoying the peaceful prairie and watching the neighbor ride around on their lawn tractor and the kids mess around on the dirt bikes across the way, and having a long conversation about stuff and the dog passing came up, along with other topics. Just hanging out, nowhere to be, which was another point... We used to have to say, "We'll have to head home soon and let the dog out and feed her..." if we were somewhere else. She usually went along to dad's place. But there was always a clock running in the back of your head... Dog needs to go out in three hours... Two hours... We'd better head home...
Dad nailed it today when he said, "You lose a dog, you lose a huge amount of daily affirmation. You come home, the dog is happy to see you. You do some chores in the garage and go inside for a drink, dog is right there to follow, or meets you at the door, happy to see you. You go on a trip, come home, dog is happy to see you. You wake up in the morning, dog is happy to see you. You get a small feeling of accomplishment from each of these encounters. You know you've done something good taking care of the dog. When was the last time you walked into work and felt like there was a true sense of accomplishment or anyone happy to see you? How about anything else you do? No matter what, dog was happy to see you and you felt happy to see them too."
He's right. I mean, I enjoy my co-workers, and volunteer friends and even talking to strangers on the ham radio, but it's not the same. There's no one as happy as a dog to see you, anywhere you go. Maybe family from time to time, or an old friend not seen in too long, but they could never put up with you the way a dog will -- and still be happy even if you're late, tired, grumpy, whatever. Even your spouse. Those little doggy affirmations add up.
So yeah, it would be only natural to reassess your life a bit after you lose your "you're awesome!" hourly affirmations. It also explains some behaviors I saw out of dad when he lost his pup years ago. More activities just for him, stuff he wanted to do that made him smile. Less spending time fixing other people's problems he didn't create. Want a toy? Sell some junk and buy the toy. Go play. (In his case a pair of used Miatas, which by the way... One of them was sold today. Someone else got a new toy for $2500. It had become a liability for him... Not driving it anymore, insurance, licensing, whatever...)
So... I've been figuring out what to do with all this time and freedom from a specific schedule I have now that our buddy is resting peacefully.
It's sentimental and stupid, but a nice wooden urn that will hold a photo is on its way here for her and that's that. (I made fun of Karen putting the darn cat in an urn on the fireplace/wood stove mantelpiece, but it's grown on me, along with his photo being there, so ... well, whatever... The dog gets one too.)
I originally wondered if the desire not to do certain stuff was a mild depression, but the description and symptoms weren't fitting. Figuring out that it's really just a big change in how many times a day there's a little creature looking up and saying, "Hey, I like you. Got a treat handy? I like those too!" was a big revelation today.
Probably obvious to some, but I hadn't figured it out in my head yet.
And quite a bit of contemplation about, "So what the hell am I doing spending my time on THAT?!" in my head lately. And a lot of deciding NOT to and thinking about whether or not some changes need to be made around here. Karen's been saying it too.
Move perhaps? Time to find the next house with all new mistakes made in purchasing it? (Good lord why did I ever buy a North-facing house in snow-country... for one example of über-stupidity buying this house...), Time to travel more? Throw some parties and have folks over? Go flying? (Well, of course...) Job hunt for something more fulfilling than fixing the same damn computer problems over and over again? Start a part-time business? Learn to play better guitar?
It's been an interesting few weeks. Just thought I'd share. Someone's going to joke that my dog passing has triggered a mid-life crisis, the way all the above sounds... ha. Not really. This is just background stuff that has time to pop to the surface lightly and be thought about with all the extra doggy care time not filled with anything yet. And a workaholic who started getting over that behavior about 2001, who's just found extra time and is kinda toying with NOT filling it with "just anything". Maybe something really WORTH doing instead this time, since I know I can't just sit still and NOT fill it.
- Sounds in the house: It's amazing how hearing a pop or creak from the wood floors upstairs will trigger one to think the dog woke up from a nap on the rug and is headed downstairs -- for a brief moment. Then no more noises and the rational brain kicks back in.
- Doors: After 16 years with one pet and 21.5 with another, when they're gone you find yourself either standing at a door wondering why they're not coming inside, or looking before you close -- to make sure you're not smacking a buddy in the nose. Weird FO catch yourself doing it.
- Smell: The house smells different. You both miss it, and don't. More miss than don't. I even miss bad dog breath.
- Other people's dogs: They (rightly) shy away from you at first, and you're taken aback a bit by it. The neighbor's new Weimeraner is particularly skittish but he's coming around. He'll figure out that I'm friend, not foe, soon enough. He's only 5 months old. Growing like a weed.
- Stuff: The dry food big sealed plastic container is still parked next to the fridge. There's a bag each of rawhide chips and bones next to it. It almost feels wrong just to throw them out. (I did toss a rawhide to the neighbor's dogs one night when they were riled up and he wasn't home to give them something else to do.) They may go to the aforementioned 5 month old's house here soon. The food and water bowl were too much though, and they're out in one of the garages, along with a big kennel/crate and a few other things. The leash and collar are still in the back of the Yukon.
- Wildlife: We've got a lot more bunnies, wandering cats, squirrels, and other critters wandering through and around the backyard now, or just blatantly sitting in it watching us. You half expect and think, "You're going to be running soon!" and expect to see a bolt of black fur go by out the back door. Then it doesn't happen and you instead ponder how weird it is that you still think it's going to happen, and watch the critter for a while. I've been attempting to count how many rabbits are in the family under the bushes. I knew they liked our bushes because the dog in her last couple of years would walk them out of her yard slowly but not really chase and frighten them, and also relalized that her presence meant other critters didn't come into the yard looking for a bunny-snack. That balance is broken, so I'm expecting a natural depletion of bunnies one of these nights by something... Coyote, dogs, not sure what will get to them first.
- Surfing: You peek at dog rescue sites and look at all the pups that need a home and think about it, then click that one link that brings up your pup's doppelgänger and have to close the browser. Nope, not ready yet at all. No. Eventually yes. But not today.
And an interesting thought from dad today when we were talking about it. I shared that I'd kinda cleared my schedule of all the busywork and volunteer stuff the last couple of weekends and just hung out, reassessing, thinking... Job, life, plans... All the stuff you think about after a personal loss.
We had to drive out to the county to return the Suburban today, and we were standing outside enjoying the peaceful prairie and watching the neighbor ride around on their lawn tractor and the kids mess around on the dirt bikes across the way, and having a long conversation about stuff and the dog passing came up, along with other topics. Just hanging out, nowhere to be, which was another point... We used to have to say, "We'll have to head home soon and let the dog out and feed her..." if we were somewhere else. She usually went along to dad's place. But there was always a clock running in the back of your head... Dog needs to go out in three hours... Two hours... We'd better head home...
Dad nailed it today when he said, "You lose a dog, you lose a huge amount of daily affirmation. You come home, the dog is happy to see you. You do some chores in the garage and go inside for a drink, dog is right there to follow, or meets you at the door, happy to see you. You go on a trip, come home, dog is happy to see you. You wake up in the morning, dog is happy to see you. You get a small feeling of accomplishment from each of these encounters. You know you've done something good taking care of the dog. When was the last time you walked into work and felt like there was a true sense of accomplishment or anyone happy to see you? How about anything else you do? No matter what, dog was happy to see you and you felt happy to see them too."
He's right. I mean, I enjoy my co-workers, and volunteer friends and even talking to strangers on the ham radio, but it's not the same. There's no one as happy as a dog to see you, anywhere you go. Maybe family from time to time, or an old friend not seen in too long, but they could never put up with you the way a dog will -- and still be happy even if you're late, tired, grumpy, whatever. Even your spouse. Those little doggy affirmations add up.
So yeah, it would be only natural to reassess your life a bit after you lose your "you're awesome!" hourly affirmations. It also explains some behaviors I saw out of dad when he lost his pup years ago. More activities just for him, stuff he wanted to do that made him smile. Less spending time fixing other people's problems he didn't create. Want a toy? Sell some junk and buy the toy. Go play. (In his case a pair of used Miatas, which by the way... One of them was sold today. Someone else got a new toy for $2500. It had become a liability for him... Not driving it anymore, insurance, licensing, whatever...)
So... I've been figuring out what to do with all this time and freedom from a specific schedule I have now that our buddy is resting peacefully.
It's sentimental and stupid, but a nice wooden urn that will hold a photo is on its way here for her and that's that. (I made fun of Karen putting the darn cat in an urn on the fireplace/wood stove mantelpiece, but it's grown on me, along with his photo being there, so ... well, whatever... The dog gets one too.)
I originally wondered if the desire not to do certain stuff was a mild depression, but the description and symptoms weren't fitting. Figuring out that it's really just a big change in how many times a day there's a little creature looking up and saying, "Hey, I like you. Got a treat handy? I like those too!" was a big revelation today.
Probably obvious to some, but I hadn't figured it out in my head yet.
And quite a bit of contemplation about, "So what the hell am I doing spending my time on THAT?!" in my head lately. And a lot of deciding NOT to and thinking about whether or not some changes need to be made around here. Karen's been saying it too.
Move perhaps? Time to find the next house with all new mistakes made in purchasing it? (Good lord why did I ever buy a North-facing house in snow-country... for one example of über-stupidity buying this house...), Time to travel more? Throw some parties and have folks over? Go flying? (Well, of course...) Job hunt for something more fulfilling than fixing the same damn computer problems over and over again? Start a part-time business? Learn to play better guitar?
It's been an interesting few weeks. Just thought I'd share. Someone's going to joke that my dog passing has triggered a mid-life crisis, the way all the above sounds... ha. Not really. This is just background stuff that has time to pop to the surface lightly and be thought about with all the extra doggy care time not filled with anything yet. And a workaholic who started getting over that behavior about 2001, who's just found extra time and is kinda toying with NOT filling it with "just anything". Maybe something really WORTH doing instead this time, since I know I can't just sit still and NOT fill it.
Skylane81E
Final Approach
Nate, I think some day very soon you will wander into the local shelter and fall in love.
Regardless of if you are ready or not, trust me, in less than a year of not living under a "maximum of 70lbs of pet" lease we added 160lbs and tripled the wagging tail count. Even the "foster" dog never left.
Regardless of if you are ready or not, trust me, in less than a year of not living under a "maximum of 70lbs of pet" lease we added 160lbs and tripled the wagging tail count. Even the "foster" dog never left.