How 'bout some more?
- People who walk under a 3-story high neon "NO VACANCY" sign, past a chalkboard sign that says "SOLD OUT", past a laminated sign that says "Sorry, no room at the inn" to ask "Y'all got any rooms?"
(Some day I'm going to jump up and shout "Yes. YES! We've got a SECRET room that we've been holding JUST FOR YOU! We've turned away dozens of people, and lit the NO VACANCY sign just to keep it for YOU! It's your lucky day!"
Yeah, that's what I'll say...)
- Local vendors who display their business cards in our lobby, and are so competitive that they steal the OTHER business's business cards while they're at it.
- The husband, wife, and 3 kids who show up on the island, on the Fourth of July weekend, at midnight, without a reservation, having driven 300 miles, and are stunned and angry when they can't find a room anywhere for 100 miles.
- These same people who, when they called 12 hours earlier, were told that our very last room was available for $159.95, and said "We'll think about it" and never called back.
- People who clean the trash out of their cars...into my parking lot.
- People who buy awnings, put 'em up at the beach, are amazed and ****ed when the strong ocean breeze shreds the awning -- and then leave the metal awning skeletons on the beach. Some Sunday afternoons there might be a dozen or more, scattered up and down 10 miles of beach.
- People who review us on Tripadvisor and say "Breakfast consisted of apple juice and a muffin. It was okay", making it sound paltry and cheap -- and fail to note that it was delivered to their room, and that it was exactly what they had ORDERED for breakfast.
- People who trash towels for no apparent reason. Sometimes you would think people used 'em as drop cloths under their oil change buckets.
- Flippers. You know, those people who buy properties, hold 'em, and sell 'em, hopefully for a profit. We bought this hotel from one back in 2010, a father/daughter team from Austin, and have spent the last 2.5 years undoing everything stupid they did to this place in the 3 years they owned it. They did everything wrong, from using standard, galvanized hardware (on an island in the Gulf?) to using cheap, undersized air conditioners -- if they could do it cheaply, they did.
What's so dumb is that most of the time they saved nickels -- I mean, c'mon, a stainless steel screw is not that much more than galvanized -- but now it's an enormous job to replace them.
Okay, I'm done. This IS fun, though. What a great thread!