Lets make Friday 'Joke Day'!

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Bubba went to Alabama on a football scholarship. He was a good running back, but a poor student.

At graduation day, Bubba didn't have enough credits. But he was a great football star and the students held a rally and demanded the dean give him a diploma anyway. They were so insistent that the dean agreed if Bubba could answer one question correctly he would give him a diploma.

The one question test was held in the auditorium and the students packed the place. It was standing room only.

The dean was on the stage and told Bubba to come up. The dean had the diploma in his hand and said, "Bubba, if you can answer this question correctly I'll give you your diploma." Bubba said he was ready and the dean asked him the question. "Bubba," he said, "How much is three times seven?"

Bubba looked up at the ceiling and then down at his shoes, just pondering the question. The students began chanting, "Graduate him anyway! Graduate him anyway!"

Then Bubba held up his hand and the auditorium became silent. Bubba said, "I think I know the answer. Three times seven is twenty-one."

A hush fell over the auditorium...and then the Alabama students began another chant. "Give him another chance! Give him another chance!"
 
THESE ARE ACTUAL COMPLAINTS RECEIVED BY "THOMAS COOK VACATIONS" FROM DISSATISFIED CUSTOMERS:

1. "They should not allow topless sunbathing on the beach. It was very distracting for my husband who just wanted to relax."

2. "On my holiday to Goa in India, I was disgusted to find that almost every restaurant served curry. I don't like spicy food."

3. "We went on holiday to Spain and had a problem with the taxi drivers as they were all Spanish."

4. "We booked an excursion to a water park but no-one told us we had to bring our own swimsuits and towels. We assumed it would be included in the price."

5. "The beach was too sandy. We had to clean everything when we returned to our room."

6. "We found the sand was not like the sand in the brochure. Your brochure shows the sand as white but it was more yellow."

7. "It's lazy of the local shopkeepers in Puerto Vallartato close in the afternoons. I often needed to buy things during 'siesta' time -- this should be banned."

8. "No-one told us there would be fish in the water. The children were scared."

9. "Although the brochure said that there was a fully equipped kitchen, there was no egg-slicer in the drawers."

10. "I think it should be explained in the brochure that the local convenience store does not sell proper biscuits like custard creams or ginger nuts."

11. "The roads were uneven and bumpy, so we could not read the local guide book during the bus ride to the resort. Because of this, we were unaware of many things that would have made our holiday more fun."

12. "It took us nine hours to fly home from Jamaica to England. It took the Americans only three hours to get home. This seems unfair."

13. "I compared the size of our one-bedroom suite to our friends' three-bedroom and ours was significantly smaller."

14. "The brochure stated: 'No hairdressers at the resort.' We're trainee hairdressers and we think they knew and made us wait longer for service."

15. "When we were in Spain, there were too many Spanish people there. The receptionist spoke Spanish, the food was Spanish. No one told us that there would be so many foreigners."

16. "We had to line up outside to catch the boat and there was no air-conditioning."

17. "It is your duty as a tour operator to advise us of noisy or unruly guests before we travel."

18. "I was bitten by a mosquito. The brochure did not mention mosquitoes."

19. "My fiancée and I requested twin-beds when we booked, but instead we were placed in a room with a king bed. We now hold you responsible and want to be re-reimbursed for the fact that I became pregnant. This would not have happened if you had put us in the room that we booked."

Source: Peter Dickinson

Ya just cant fix stupid!
 
Oh yeah. Here is the original post:
http://archive.is/49feY

The really sad thing is if you scroll to the comments at the bottom, most comments at the time were from people agreeing with her. (Don't click on the "comments" link at the top - it will take you to ads, just scroll to the bottom).

I forgot about this other gem in there since the oxygen thing took the cake:
"When your body is in the air, at a seriously high altitude, your body under goes some serious pressure. Just think about it – Airplanes thrive in places we don’t. You are traveling in a pressurized cabin, and when your body is pressurized, it gets really compressed!"

OK, as I was reading and enjoying this entertaining thread, I came across this little exchange and wondered what the heck you guys were talking about and made the mistake of reading that linked blog. Seriously...!?!??!? This person is for real?!?

Some of my other favorites from that article..

"Best strategies to keep your body... free of aliments" - probably a typo but maybe not when placed against the overall illiteracy of the rest of the blog.
"Ask your Acupuncturist or Nauropath..." - or your Mailman, or your Grocery Store Checkout Clerk... and, what the heck is a "nauropath?" I'm assuming someone specializing in naurology..
A spray bottle of evian (NOT capitalized!) spritzer to rehydrate your skin??!?! My skin wouldn't know the difference between water and hydraulic fluid, much less water and "evian."
"Economy Class Syndrome results the action of sitting in a cramped space for a long period of time...." - Huh? Much confuse. Very grammar.

Of the course, the one originally quoted re/ cabin pressure is the real beaut, but I didn't want to let these other ones go unrecognized.. they deserve some love too. Unbelievable.
 
That’s deep on multiple levels. Pencils were the rewinder of choice. Do kids these days rven know what a pencil is?
And the tip of a finger would do in a pinch. Though quite a bit slower.
 
Cute, but that's not from the first step on the moon. This may not have been Armstrong or even the first trip. The footage of Neil making the first step was from a mounted camera on the side of the lander.

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You do realize it was a joke right?
 
"Dad, when I grow up I wanna be a drummer!"

"Son, you can't have it both ways."
 
You do realize it was a joke right?
Ive been known for ruining a perfectly good joke from time to time. Sometimes it is by accident.

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I don't normally join in on political memes, but was tickled that this one used a Fly Baby.
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Ron Wanttaja
 
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