How do YOU make money?

I'm a whore. That's English for "Consultant"

My favorite consulting experience was a 2.5 hour meeting where a little snot nose B-school Jag was constantly typing. When the meeting ended, I asked him to forward me the copious notes he had taken during the meeting.

Naturally I asked Jag while talking to him and his manager.

I got a whopping 9 sentences of notes, which I forwarded to the manager.

Jag didn't seem to type so much after that.
 
JOhnH said:
Ok, I admit it. I have no idea what that show is. But I do have Netflix. Perhaps I will check it out if someone will give me a hint.
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Watch it and you wont' regret it. I'm as conservative as they come but, like meth, I was hooked from the first minute. When the show was described to me I thought there was no way I could enjoy it. But I said the same thing about The Simpsons 25 years ago too, and South Park after that. :D
 
Gerhardt said:
Watch it and you wont' regret it. I'm as conservative as they come but, like meth, I was hooked from the first minute. When the show was described to me I thought there was no way I could enjoy it. But I said the same thing about The Simpsons 25 years ago too, and South Park after that. :D
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My young DIL is a high-school science and physics teacher. When I told my son the basis of the show he didn't think she would like it.

He was wrong.

They also have been watching "Orange is the new Black..."
 
N801BH said:
I feel just the opposite..... Best thing I ever did....

Who the hell wants to work for the "man"...:dunno:
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You must not have project managers like 6PC reporting to you a bunch of hoowey as you are getting chewed out by a client through an email on your phone.

Ugh....
 
brian];1984216 said:
You must not have project managers like 6PC reporting to you a bunch of hoowey as you are getting chewed out by a client through an email on your phone.

Ugh....
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Hey, I am good at my job.
I'm "Senior" PM They don't just give that title to anyone. :no:

I am delivering a $4.8m project in May ahead of schedule and under budget :yes:

-Bryan
Scrum Master, Master of Scrumming!
 
SixPapaCharlie said:
Hey, I am good at my job.
I'm "Senior" PM They don't just give that title to anyone. :no:

I am delivering a $4.8m project in May ahead of schedule and under budget :yes:

-Bryan
Scrum Master, Master of Scrumming!
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Just busting your chops. IT can be a pain. One of my managers and was dropped a pile today. Spent hours having a stake holder jab me a in the back today.

Back to working on that time machine.
 
I encourage my kids to go into nursing or anything other than I.T. for that matter.

I showed them: "This is what daddy looks at for 8 hours a day"

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They agree it is the most boring computer game ever
 

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I'm making a small fortune in agriculture.

I started with a large fortune. :lol:
 
JOhnH said:
Ok, I admit it. I have no idea what that show is. But I do have Netflix. Perhaps I will check it out if someone will give me a hint.
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While your at it check out House of Cards on Netflix. GREAT show.
 
SixPapaCharlie said:
I encourage my kids to go into nursing or anything other than I.T. for that matter.

I showed them: "This is what daddy looks at for 8 hours a day"

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They agree it is the most boring computer game ever
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That timeline reminds me of this:
 

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SixPapaCharlie said:
I look at spreadsheets that have tasks listed on them and I ask people if they can finish the task by their name by the date shown next to the task.

Then I tell my boss that they won't be done in time.
My boss asks me to present the data to the stake holders and I stand in front of them usually way under-dressed and look at their blank stares and say things like

"We need to tee up that conversation"
"I want to touch base with the business before we socialize these numbers"
"We need to open the lines of communication"
"We need to break down silos"

Then the top guy in the room that was texting his mistress instead of listening to me will say "Well, that was good, can you send out the notes from this meeting" because he has no idea what I said.

Then I go back to my desk and talk to the other project managers about how tough this project is and how I really have no bandwidth left to assist them with anything. They say "Yeah, I hear that" And then someone says synergize and we go home.
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I'm the Director at the other end of the room doing the double-facepalm at this, because I now know the next 2 mos of my life will be spent with that guy trying to explain that my technology solution doesn't alleviate his need to fix his group's broken business process. And that ultimately, we will end up in a meeting with HR and the CFO where he will crawfish and admit that he doesn't have the right people in critical positions, so he needs 6 mos to re-org and hire competent people.
 
Frogs97 said:
I'm the Director at the other end of the room doing the double-facepalm at this, because I now know the next 2 mos of my life will be spent with that guy trying to explain that my technology solution doesn't alleviate his need to fix his group's broken business process. And that ultimately, we will end up in a meeting with HR and the CFO where he will crawfish and admit that he doesn't have the right people in critical positions, so he needs 6 mos to re-org and hire competent people.
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Obviously you read my email.

Or that the person in charge of implementing the business process associated with said software implementation is afraid of computers. Time to nut up and tell the president / CEO of the company (your client) it's time to cut wood. (Heaven forbid the 6PC ... um ... PM drops the ball during this critical time period. Say, isnt there a gorgeous blond mistress I'm supposed to have my way with at this point??!)

Back to that time machine.
 
SixPapaCharlie said:
I wish I was a chicken farmer
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I'm the COO and let me tell ya, it ain't all rainbows and gumdrops. 33,000,000 gals to feed and care for every day(as in 24/7/365). 1200 employees to keep happy.

My IT department is top notch though and is one of our competitive advantages in the industry. What gets measured gets managed and the black box wizards make glorious things happen.
 
Mason said:
But but but....your product isn't chickens. It is eggs?
Chickens are just the work force. Employees.
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We care for hens. You call a guy who takes care of pigs a pork chop farmer?
 
James_Dean said:
We care for hens. You call a guy who takes care of pigs a pork chop farmer?
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Well, no. I would call him a pig farmer. Pork chops are
(one of) the end result. BACON! BACON!

I guess what I meant to say is that you care for your hens the same way you care for your employees. You feed them, take care of them, encourage them, treat them well, they do good work for you.
 
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SixPapaCharlie said:
...And I have my new signature.
Thank you Eggman
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The sad part is that I went to college to be a computer engineer. I'm not accustomed to feeling stupid, but when I listen to my CTO talk I feel like a monkey trying to comprehend the electron structure of plutonium.
 
James_Dean said:
I see you're using it without attribution? F'ing bastard!
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I hope the monkey punches you in the junk. Hard. Then that evening your wife wants to make happy time, but you can't and have to tell her why.
 
One of my daughters' school teachers asked her what I did for a living. She said, "Nothing, he's a pilot." I've tried to live up to that for going on 40 years now.
 
Farm, raise corn and soybeans, have a cow/calf operation, sell seed to area farmers and fly a little.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
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