FOB Rant

Sac Arrow

Touchdown! Greaser!
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May 11, 2010
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Snorting his way across the USA
Monday morning status briefing. All present. No, not all are present. Where's Deakin? Where's Morse?

"Um, Mr. Arrow, Deakin is in Hayward."

"Deakin was supposed to be back a couple hours ago. Where's Morse?"

"Driving to Hayward."

"Why is Morse driving to Hayward?"

"He's taking the spare fob to Deakin. Deakin accidentally locked his in the new car."

Flash back a couple weeks ago:

Riiiiingggg. "Arrow speaking."

"Um, Sac, this is Cindy. I got a problem." Oh ****. Now what.

"I'm locked out of the car."

"The new one?"

"For god's sake I told you people from day one...."

"I don't have any pockets. I'm wearing a dress. The fob was in my purse. I didn't want to take my purse to the meeting. It's in the car."

You know, I don't like it. I mean in theory it's cool and all, keyless start. But it REALLY DOESN'T HELP ME. I still have to drag it out, push a button to unlock the car, and then I have to make a conscious decision to put it back in my pocket, behind my ear, up my butthole, duck taped to my forehead or just swallow the thing so I don't accidentally leave it in the car after I get out.

It's bigger than a key. In fact, it's bigger than the little fob thingie attached to a modern key, because it has a mini-key embedded in it. But unlike a key, you need to physically retrieve it to shut off the car. And you don't need to the fob to lock the car either, although it's a really good idea to get in the habit of doing so if you have one of these things. When I get out of a car what do I do? I make sure the keys are IN MY HAND when I lock the car. I do the same with the fob. Others aren't as self disciplined.

I have a fob for my motorcycle too. I don't like that either. I can start the motorcycle without fussing with the fob, but I cannot leave my side cases or gas tank in an unlocked state, so I must fish for the key thing embedded in the fob to unlock something almost every single ride. A key is actually more convenient, because I don't have remove my glove to stuff it back in my pocket.

Kinda like how Microsoft has a great product (Office suite) and then they reorganize all the menus with no added functionality and it only makes it more cumbersome to use. I'm all for gadgetry and product improvement, but fobs are going backwards.
 
Dang, don't you guys use AAA?

Sending a paid employee on a 20 mile round trip doesn't seem very cost effective.
 
Most, if not all key fobs can be programmed. I would think that all of them can be set to not lock the doors at any time unless the little lock button is pressed. Meaning, that the car will not lock itself, and must be locked via the fob. Therefore, if the fob is in the car, and you exit the car, leave the fob inside the car, the door you left from will not subsequently lock itself. I hate to say "RTFM" but most likely the programming for the fob is in the owners manual.
 
Technology will get you every time.
 
My car will not lock the doors when you get out if the FOB is inside the car. If it detects both FOBs, it will lock the doors so long as one of them has been removed. Pretty good logic. It has keyless entry too, so I just leave the key in my pocket the entire time (unlocks the door when you pull on the handle if the key is within 3 feet). Automatically locks when I walk away. This is on a Chevy Cruze (optional equip, of course), so expect this will be standard on most cars in a few years.
 
My car has a button outside the door that unlocks the door if the fob is nearby, and has keyless start besides. Fob stays in the pocket, never have to touch it. If the fob is inside the car, the doors won't lock.

Soon after getting the car, my wife and I went somewhere and the **** doors wouldn't lock. Eventually found that her purse had fallen over and her fob had slid under the seat.

Ron Wanttaja
 
My car will not lock the doors if the FOB is inside the car (until in gear). If it detects both FOBs, it will lock the doors so long as one of them has been removed. Pretty good logic. It has keyless entry too, so I just leave the key in my pocket the entire time (unlocks the door when you pull on the handle if the key is within 3 feet). Automatically locks when I walk away. This is on a Chevy Cruze (optional equip, of course), so expect this will be standard on most cars in a few years.
We rented a car like this, or maybe it was a crew car. Anyway, I was saying how easy it would be to lock the FOB inside. But we did some experimenting and, like your car, it would sense the FOB inside and not lock the doors. I don't remember the model of the car.
 
Solution: drive old cars! :D
 
Onstar will unlock my doors. The iPhone app will even tell me where my car is parked.
 
Solution: drive old cars! :D
But I still remember my mother locking my keys in the car, which were in the ignition with the engine running, when I dropped her off at Stapleton Airport... sometime in the late 1980s. She clicked the lock button on the passenger's side out of habit. I had the driver's side door closed so it wouldn't block traffic as I was getting her bag out of the back.
 
Shoulda bought a Ford or a Lincoln,;) I never take my keys out and always lock my doors! :D
Keyless entry pads are a wonderful thing! :yes:
 
Shoulda bought a Ford or a Lincoln,;) I never take my keys out and always lock my doors! :D
Keyless entry pads are a wonderful thing! :yes:

I always liked that feature.
 
Shoulda bought a Ford or a Lincoln,;) I never take my keys out and always lock my doors! :D
Keyless entry pads are a wonderful thing! :yes:
Pretty easy to break into a car with one of those. We had an guy at a previous job that had a Lincoln who would leave his keys under the seat. We would constantly move his car to the far end of the parking lot.
 
Shoulda bought a Ford or a Lincoln,;) I never take my keys out and always lock my doors! :D
Keyless entry pads are a wonderful thing! :yes:

My FIL had a Windstar van with that, he owned it for six years and left the key in the ignition the whole time. "Hey Jim, you might want to at least throw the key under a floor mat or something". "Nah, that's what insurance is for". Nobody ever touched the thing, but it WAS a Windstar.

We had a Crown Vic with that, I always left the key under the seat.
 
Well I just took the vehicle in question for a lunch run. I learned:

1. I can indeed unlock the car from the outside without touching my fob. (Edit: "the fob.")

2. I can indeed lock the doors standing outside of the vehicle with the fob sitting in the seat or storage trays.

I have not yet consulted the POH for the vehicle to get all the details and options.
 
My FIL had a Windstar van with that, he owned it for six years and left the key in the ignition the whole time. "Hey Jim, you might want to at least throw the key under a floor mat or something". "Nah, that's what insurance is for". Nobody ever touched the thing, but it WAS a Windstar.

We had a Crown Vic with that, I always left the key under the seat.

I was once given a Bronco II.

The ignition lock was broken so it could be turned with no key.

It wasn't stolen. The previous owner even had trouble giving it away.

Of course, it was ugly as crap.
 
Well I just took the vehicle in question for a lunch run. I learned:

1. I can indeed unlock the car from the outside without touching my fob. (Edit: "the fob.")

2. I can indeed lock the doors standing outside of the vehicle with the fob sitting in the seat or storage trays.

I have not yet consulted the POH for the vehicle to get all the details and options.

What kind of car is this? Our Nissan will lock the doors with the fob inside, but when you push the door closed, it unlocks and sounds a horrible noise to let you know what you did. Even if what you did was close the door before your wife and her purse with Fob #2 exited the vehicle.
 
I flew for Macy's. We flew into Pocatello, with temps about 105°, and the head suit from the store was there to pick up the big wigs from New York. Except they locked their keys inside the car with the engine running and the A/C on.

This was a few years back, and I forget the exact outcome, but it was funny at the time.
 
Well I just took the vehicle in question for a lunch run. I learned:

1. I can indeed unlock the car from the outside without touching my fob. (Edit: "the fob.")

2. I can indeed lock the doors standing outside of the vehicle with the fob sitting in the seat or storage trays.

I have not yet consulted the POH for the vehicle to get all the details and options.

This is basically correct operation. The mfg figures that if you accidentally leave the fob in the car, and walk away, a lockout charge is much less costly than a stolen car. Also, if you investigate further, you'll find that you were given a 'emer' mechanical key to put on your key ring. The emer key will go into a somewhat hidden key slot somewhere on the drivers door. In the new Mini Cooper, it's on the bottom of the handle.
 
What kind of car is this? Our Nissan will lock the doors with the fob inside, but when you push the door closed, it unlocks and sounds a horrible noise to let you know what you did. Even if what you did was close the door before your wife and her purse with Fob #2 exited the vehicle.

It's a Chrysler product. I have not tried closing the door with the fob inside, assuming that if knew the fob was in there and I wasn't, it wouldn't allow the doors to lock in the first place. But, two others managed to lock the fob in there so that move has already been tested.
 
Pretty easy to break into a car with one of those. We had an guy at a previous job that had a Lincoln who would leave his keys under the seat. We would constantly move his car to the far end of the parking lot.

No it isn't. It is a five digit code. Unless you know the code or are Navajo, its not easy. My credentials, 20 year parts/service mgr. Ford dealership.
 
This is basically correct operation. The mfg figures that if you accidentally leave the fob in the car, and walk away, a lockout charge is much less costly than a stolen car. Also, if you investigate further, you'll find that you were given a 'emer' mechanical key to put on your key ring. The emer key will go into a somewhat hidden key slot somewhere on the drivers door. In the new Mini Cooper, it's on the bottom of the handle.

Ahhh that makes sense. But this is a fleet vehicle. I'm not even sure where the 'emer' key is unless it's the mechanical key stuffed in the fob. But that one won't attach to a key ring so maybe it's in with the paperwork in the glove box.
 
Ahhh that makes sense. But this is a fleet vehicle. I'm not even sure where the 'emer' key is unless it's the mechanical key stuffed in the fob. But that one won't attach to a key ring so maybe it's in with the paperwork in the glove box.

Fleet don't make no diff. It was programmed when it left the dealer, and it is what it is. What does your owners book say?
 
Fleet don't make no diff. It was programmed when it left the dealer, and it is what it is. What does your owners book say?

What I was getting at is the emergency key. If there is one, there is probably only one, and what do you do, check the emergency key out with the fob? It will probably just get lost.
 
My cars still have traditional keys not the push to start FOBs... but I imagine you could rework my system for it.

I never go anywhere without 2 sets of keys. One set is used to start the car, the other remains in my pocket. Using this system I have never once locked myself out of the car.

It worked even better in the pre-FOB days because I had a single spare keyring with keys to everything I ever needed to get into which was the one that stayed in my pocket. Unfortunately the new fat FOB keys are just too big to do that anymore.
 
What I was getting at is the emergency key. If there is one, there is probably only one, and what do you do, check the emergency key out with the fob? It will probably just get lost.

I don't know what you do. What I do is keep the emer key in my magnetic key hider, and attached to the rear upper brace of my car suspension. So, when my wife leaves the fob in the car, or loses it, or otherwise mangles the fob I can explain to her how to reach up in the well of the rear tire and get the emer key to get home, where I will sort out the fob issue. I left mine programmed so it will lock the car with the fob inside, because like the mfg, I consider a lockout charge better than a stolen car where the key was provided to the thief through negligence(ours).
 
Takes about 20 minutes. Googling took less than one. http://everything2.com/title/Weak+security+in+our+daily+lives

Sent from my KFTHWI using Tapatalk


20 minutes is easy? I mean, I can "get in" in about 10 seconds with a hammer. Second, I don't believe everything I read on the internet. I always just leave my doors unlocked, I don't have anything of value in my truck anyway, and if the crook can just open the door, he usually will just go without damage. Different strokes for different folks.


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Our new Lincoln MKs has this exact fob set up. From day one, I have been saying that it was a solution looking for a problem.

I'm used to it now, after a month, but it took some getting used to.
 
You know, I don't like it. I mean in theory it's cool and all, keyless start. But it REALLY DOESN'T HELP ME. I still have to drag it out, push a button to unlock the car, and then I have to make a conscious decision to put it back in my pocket, behind my ear, up my butthole, duck taped to my forehead or just swallow the thing so I don't accidentally leave it in the car after I get out.

Never has the term "First world problems" been more appropriate. :goofy:
 
My car had electric locks. A few snips of some wires fixed that. I never lock my doors.
 
Never has the term "First world problems" been more appropriate. :goofy:

I was thinking the same thing. :yesnod:

'Oh - darn. My diamond tennis bracelet has snagged on my cashmere sweater.'

j/k :wink2:
 
Technology will get you every time.

Design an idiot-proof item and nature will invent a bigger idiot. Or something like that.

I still want to know what's the RF attenuation on the fob if Mr. Arrow sticks it up his butt :rofl: That's gotta decrease the effective range of the device.
 
Design an idiot-proof item and nature will invent a bigger idiot. Or something like that.

I still want to know what's the RF attenuation on the fob if Mr. Arrow sticks it up his butt :rofl: That's gotta decrease the effective range of the device.

I haven't actually tried it, but I suspect doing so would limit the pool of employees willing to use the vehicle.
 
I have unlocked them before by pushing random numbers until it finally unlocked, that was 15 years ago, but I am sure it still works. ;)
I don't know of anyone ever having a car stolen by someone randomly cracking the codes. I do have one customer in his late 70's that always sets his code to 77777 so he can remember it. :D

Takes about 20 minutes. Googling took less than one. http://everything2.com/title/Weak+security+in+our+daily+lives

Sent from my KFTHWI using Tapatalk
 
Shoulda bought a Ford or a Lincoln,;) I never take my keys out and always lock my doors! :D
Keyless entry pads are a wonderful thing! :yes:

A similar system in the door frame behind the driver's door in my 2013 Escape. I cannot lock my self out of that car. I had a fob type key for the rental car on Kauai. I had to dig it out of my pocket to unlock the doors. What was the point?
 
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