Flying issues with the other half..

Xscaliber said:
My wife used to get real nervous flying with me, sometimes so bad she used to describe her legs as like jelly ! she really wanted to be part of the hobby but struggled with the fear side of it.
I enrolled her on a pinch hitter course with a girl CFI, it worked a treat, now she enjoys flying as much as I do (well amost unless it's too bumpy !) she now actively handles frequency changes, navigation waypoints,takes any photographs along the way and feels part of what we are doing.
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Ha, this sounds like my wife as well. If we had a female CFI around here I'll be all over that.
 
I’m trying to find a more comfortable headset for Mrs. Half Fast. The two we’ve tried hurt her after half an hour or so. We’re going shopping at Pilot Mall on Friday.

Be sure your wife is as physically comfortable as possible. Seat position, shoulder harness, headset, sunglasses, temperature, etc. Physical discomfort will exacerbate whatever emotional discomfort she’s feeling.
 
ScottinIowa said:
Are we sure about this?
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Remember the rule about the three 'F's - "Its cheaper to rent than own."

I have yet to solo, but a PPL is on my bucket list. My wife has been on a few instructional flights with me in a C-172. It was OK for her, except when we were doing slow flight and the plane yawed a lot.

She's generally scared of heights, I could tell you a story about a time share in a tower in Hawaii, but she says flying in a light plane is like flying above a landscape painting.

She's OK with me getting a plane. It has to hold at least two people, and has to be side by side seating. She thinks canard A/C are cool, too.

My MIL did a lot of flying when she was working in banking. In fact, she's probably spent more time in light planes than I have. She is mobility impaired, so one of my possible airplanes is a Cessna C-177 Cardinal. I also like the cabin width.
 
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Half Fast said:
I’m trying to find a more comfortable headset for Mrs. Half Fast. The two we’ve tried hurt her after half an hour or so. We’re going shopping at Pilot Mall on Friday.

Be sure your wife is as physically comfortable as possible. Seat position, shoulder harness, headset, sunglasses, temperature, etc. Physical discomfort will exacerbate whatever emotional discomfort she’s feeling.
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Curious if you've tried those in ear type, i.e. Halo. My wife saw those at Oshkosh and was interested in trying them out. I promptly reminded her she has a Bose A2!
 
Half Fast said:
I’m trying to find a more comfortable headset for Mrs. Half Fast. The two we’ve tried hurt her after half an hour or so. We’re going shopping at Pilot Mall on Friday.

Be sure your wife is as physically comfortable as possible. Seat position, shoulder harness, headset, sunglasses, temperature, etc. Physical discomfort will exacerbate whatever emotional discomfort she’s feeling.
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My fiancee surprised me when she said she liked the David Clarks H10-13.4 with gel earpads and their nice foam headband pad. putting those fabric covers on the ear pads helped as well. Her complaint now is the color, and doesn't seem willing to accept that her choices are basically DC green, gray, black, or pink if we get kiddie headsets, and that each model only comes in one color. I offered to disassemble her DCs and paint the ear cups whatever color she wants :rofl:
 
Cluemeister said:
Curious if you've tried those in ear type, i.e. Halo. My wife saw those at Oshkosh and was interested in trying them out. I promptly reminded her she has a Bose A2!
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We went to Pilot Mall today and she tried on several sets, but she wasn’t interested in an in-ear style. Her level of comfort seemed directly proportional to price, naturally. We ended up with a David Clark DC-One-X and we have a 30 day trial. I’m planning to take her up Sunday and we’ll see how she likes them in the air.

If the DC isn’t good enough, we’re near the price point where it would be more affordable for me to find a weekend girlfriend who can be comfortable wearing my ASA headset....
 
I went from one extreme to the other. My late wife’s twin sister was a non pilot employee of the NTSB. The only thing she saw about GA was accidents. When I started flying she made my wife promise her that she would never fly with me. My poor wife was caught in the middle. She wanted to fly with me, but had promised her twin sister she wouldn’t. After my wife’s death her sister asked me If she ever did and I told her no, which was a true answer. My late wife did, however, support my flying and liked the fact I was doing something I enjoyed.

After my wife’s death a few years ago, I met a wonderful woman who I have married. She is ready to get in the plane at the drop of a hat. Problem is she thinks of it as an airline expecting it to leave on time under any and all conditions. I am a careful pilot. If most everything involved with the flight doesn’t line up properly I don’t go. It was a problem at first, but she is now more knowledgeable and doesn’t give me a hard time about it.
 
Cluemeister said:
Curious if you've tried those in ear type, i.e. Halo. My wife saw those at Oshkosh and was interested in trying them out. I promptly reminded her she has a Bose A2!
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I wear a Clarity Aloft with silicone christmas tree plugs in the summer and the BoseA2 in the winter. Passengers get their choice of Faro ANR or my David Clarks. Since the FARO requires one to keep the mic so close to their lips, they go for the DCs.
 
MBDiagMan said:
I went from one extreme to the other. My late wife’s twin sister was a non pilot employee of the NTSB. The only thing she saw about GA was accidents. When I started flying she made my wife promise her that she would never fly with me. My poor wife was caught in the middle. She wanted to fly with me, but had promised her twin sister she wouldn’t. After my wife’s death her sister asked me If she ever did and I told her no, which was a true answer. My late wife did, however, support my flying and liked the fact I was doing something I enjoyed.
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Wow. No disrespect to the deceased but there’s a severe lack of boundaries if I ever saw one.

“Hey sis, don’t do that.”
“Yeah, um, whatever.”
 
Half Fast said:
We went to Pilot Mall today and she tried on several sets, but she wasn’t interested in an in-ear style. Her level of comfort seemed directly proportional to price, naturally. We ended up with a David Clark DC-One-X and we have a 30 day trial. I’m planning to take her up Sunday and we’ll see how she likes them in the air.

If the DC isn’t good enough, we’re near the price point where it would be more affordable for me to find a weekend girlfriend who can be comfortable wearing my ASA headset....
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UPDATE - She used the DC-One-X this morning and found it comfortable for the two hours we flew. Guess I’m stuck.
 
Please explain to me why marrying your girlfriend is a good idea. I understand if she is wealthy.
 
Maybe she’ll make him a great sammich, and they can save on health insurance?
 
Half Fast said:
UPDATE - She used the DC-One-X this morning and found it comfortable for the two hours we flew. Guess I’m stuck.
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Maybe you should look for a set of uncomfortable headsets?
 
My wife does not go with me if I am simply going to the airport to do bump and goes around the pattern. If I am going someplace interesting to her, you bet she'll go. And flying across the state she has the sectional in her lap with a finger where she thinks we are. GPS couldn't do better. And if we're going to a place with a place to eat that she likes, no problem. Friday Harbor is great, BTW.

Right after I got my PP cert (in 2001) I took her flying. Let her take the controls. She gave them back after a few seconds. She said she had scared herself. I don't know how, she hadn't deviated from straight and level. Oh well. I bought her the AOPA Pinch Hitter class back when it was on VHS tape. We still haven't broken the shrink wrap.
 
Ghery said:
My wife does not go with me if I am simply going to the airport to do bump and goes around the pattern.
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Be honest now, if someone asked you to sit in the right seat while he/she flies bump and goes in your local pattern would you go?

Yeah, doesn't sound real exciting to me either.
 
I guess I’m lucky, my wife not only let’s me do what I want but supports it all and gets into it.

I do Ironman races and she’ll put up with all my training and on race day wake up at 4am and spend the next 12 hours standing around from the time I get up to eat breakfast till I cross the finish.
 
asicer said:
Be honest now, if someone asked you to sit in the right seat while he/she flies bump and goes in your local pattern would you go?

Yeah, doesn't sound real exciting to me either.
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I would in a half a heartbeat.
 
I know this thread is quite old, but I felt this response belonged here.

After having my PPL for over 4 years now. I finally had the passenger I've wanted with me. My wife agreed to go up, around the pattern, and land last night. Very smooth flight. Hopefully, not the last time.

JD
 
asicer said:
Yeah, doesn't sound real exciting to me either.
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Watching The Real Housewives... going shopping... or just about any of the stuff that a typical wife or girlfriend may want to do aren't that exciting either, in fact most men would find these things remarkably boring. Something that's important about a relationship is supporting your partner, and honestly spending time with your other half shouldn't be about the activity itself per se, but the intrinsic value of doing that said activity together and doing something you know makes your other half happy

It kills me when people have wives and girlfriends that won't fly with them, and even more when they curtail their partner's hobby

But I digress.
 
I can count on one hand the number of times I’ve gone flying without my wife since I got my airplane. I guess I’m just lucky that she LOVES flying!
 
My wife, who used to get air sick and rarely wanted to fly, is now a regular passenger. We bought a plane at the beginning of the year and have been using it religiously since. Our two year old seems to be getting some enjoyment out of the trips as well, so it's a win all around.
 
I'm one of the very lucky ones, Mary loves to fly (read that as travel). She is not into breakfast runs or training, but pick a destination or a date night out to dinner and she's ready to go. After our accident I honestly didn't think she would ever get in another plane. We took our time, worked on our health first then both decided we wanted to fly or at least travel with our own plane. If my bride didn't want to fly we would not have purchased another plane. I figured I would rent to scratch the itch if I had to.

Thankfully, a friend flew in to meet us and he took me flying, I was good to go after that first takeoff. About a week later Mary took her turn, I think she did better then I did. I was more nervous for her on the ground then she was flying. Oh, I should mention she didn't want me to come along because she wanted the right seat.

Obviously it has all worked out, and we purchased another plane. We are making our first real trip up to Lawrence, KLWN to visit with Adam and Jeanine this weekend.
 
ScottinIowa said:
We're trying, but she's been up with me three times. Twice we got a couple miles from the field and she immediately said "take me back." The other time she gutted it out, but it was tough for her. Any advice? Anybody else have this problem? Obviously if we can't share this passion, it's going to be rough on me trying to enjoy it alone. Just keep trying?
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Just got married Saturday, wife Is terrified of flying. She has never flown on anything ever. She’s agreed to a 20 minute flight.

I’m trying to figure out how to make her first experience the best ever so she would want to do it again. I really wish it was not summer because the 100 degree heat coupled with all the thermals and turbulence are a recipe for a uncomfortable flight.
 
Rebel Lord said:
Just got married Saturday, wife Is terrified of flying. She has never flown on anything ever. She’s agreed to a 20 minute flight.

I’m trying to figure out how to make her first experience the best ever so she would want to do it again. I really wish it was not summer because the 100 degree heat coupled with all the thermals and turbulence are a recipe for a uncomfortable flight.
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Go early in the morning before things heat up and cause bumps. Or go at night after things cool down a bit. It's worth not having the bumps.
 
jsstevens said:
Go early in the morning before things heat up and cause bumps. Or go at night after things cool down a bit. It's worth not having the bumps.
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She’s a pretty late riser. And it’s barely 10am here and it’s already 90 degrees
She’s actually more open to fly at night because In her words she won’t be able to see which makes her more comfortable.
 
Rebel Lord said:
She’s actually more open to fly at night because I’m her words she won’t be able to see which makes her more comfortable.
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I've done some very smooth flights here in Central Florida summers after sundown and/or after the thunderstorms roll through.
 
When I took friends up for their first flight, I told them beforehand that we would do one circuit in the pattern (explaining what that meant) and tell them they could decide to stay in the plane or quit once we landed.

In every case, they said "let's go" before I ever turned downwind...

But, my late wife, who got me started in flying by purchasing my first "disco flight" (and for me, it WAS the 70's); would never fly with me.... "What if we both get killed?" (The kids were very young).

She would let me take all three kids up though... Go figure...
 
I guess my advice is try to figure out what part of flying doesn't agree with her, which means (gasp in horror) possible talking about feelings.

At the time this thread started, my wife hadn't gone flying with me. We went last November, I had only been asking for two or three years. I finally gave up and took one of my coworkers for a flight, which really upset her that she wasn't the first passenger. I promptly reminded that I had been asking and had gotten tired of denying others rides just because she hadn't gone yet.

Day was a clear, cold/smooth November. I had to wait for the plane to defrost first. We took off and flew over work and just did some giant circles looking at farm ponds and houses. Only two little "rough" spots, once when she hadn't adjusted the seat right, I trimmed the plane and tried to help, which resulted in me pushing on the yoke just enough to cause a slight reduction in Gs. She freaked out a little and the kids shouted "wheee". There was some turbulance as I was flying the pattern, but she said she didn't even notice that. She said it was more comfortable that flying commercial and that she trusted the pilot a bit more, which made her feel safer.
 
My boyfriend ended up with a different problem. He suggested that he'd like to get a plane someday and now I'm on track for my PPL before him.
 
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GRG55 said:
My wife does not like to fly. She'll put up with it but does not enjoy it. And that means I don't enjoy it either. So we have a deal. She's welcome to come flying with me whenever she wants, but I don't ask her any more.
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DW started as a very nervous flyer and we'd actually give her a shot of whiskey to settle her nerves before we got to the airport, but now that she's flown with me a few summers, she really gets both the kind of trips it makes possible (time machine) and the beauty of the land, sea and sky as we're flying (especially if I fly 2-3K AGL).

She'll never care to go up and do practice, but is becoming really game for a burger run or a weekend getaway.
 
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