Nope, I never said they were "outhouses", but if it makes you feel like you are effective at word gaming my comments by falsely attributing comments to me, then please proceed.
Haha..... Living in the past just a bit are you? That is funny you are clinging to some current ranking of a school that you sat in classes many decades ago. As if somehow the current ranking validates you. I have no idea where the University I graduated from is ranked, nor the school that was kind enough to bestow on me a graduate degree. Since it has been more than 2 decades since I last wrote them tuition checks, I don't see the relevance to my personal self-worth. I did scratch one of them a check today for some sort of fund raising campaign that they were kind enough to mail me a pretty letter asking for some of my money. How about you? (see what I did there??)
Yep, I do think I could find "some college that is both cheap and close to the OP's location" without even knowing where he is located. I am confident one of his original school choices included Out of State Tuition, for a "run of the mill" school like your Alma mater. Likely both of them had expensive tuition. And, it ain't difficult to find better schools than those, likely closer, and cheaper.
Yep, there are quite a few University of North Carolinas, and I would quickly dismiss the vast majority of them for somebody taking on debt and relocating for an poor education like your Louisville experience.
But, please tell us, how much debt would you advocate some kid take to go to Compass Directional University?