denverpilot
Tied Down
Jesse texts. Says he's going to be stuck driving from Denver to Lincoln. Asks if I like Lincoln, NE this time of year. Asks if I need a BFR. I'm driving home from work headed to pick up dogs from doggy daycare. And dog food.
Of course I do! I love Lincoln in January! (I lie. Hahaha. I'm having flashbacks to -10F during the Instrument Rating. There's a certain amount of PTSD associated with it. Doc says it'll get better with therapy. But I never go.)
Go preflight the airplane. Chocks frozen to floor. Denver Jet Center thinks my idea of tugging the airplane over the chocks isn't as smart as their idea of running a pot of hot water through the coffee pot. Hmm. Yeah, that's a better idea. Fuel truck rolls up with said pot of water. Chocks halfway released. Truck guy helps me push it over one chock instead of two. Half a win.
Mental note, new hangar leaks. Water freezes. No more chocks in hangar in below freezing temps.
Jesse takes his life into his own hands. Let's old DenverPilot fly him to Lincoln while doing that CFI thing, you know, sitting there not screaming too loud. Gives pointers like, "You going to leave flaps down?" Nice guy. Helpful.
We arrive in Lincoln. I have a Tweet waiting on my phone from Stephanie Rust @rustysunshine, a ZDV controller and fun person on Twitter... "Hey, was that you in my airspace over Nebraska?"
Why yes, it was! VFR even. Asking for extra services on the mid shift late at night. Aren't we nice? You were our controller?! Wow! How about that tailwind? Wheee! 155 knots GS in a 182! Thanks for vectoring all the other aircraft far far away. Haha.
Jesse hands me a checklist for this thing called a "guest bed". I let him know I'm current and qualified on the type. Haha. Bentley the wonder dog woofs his welcome and shows me his Kong and he and I play tug of war for a couple of minutes.
He loves his Kong. He'd be cool with playing tug all night. Bentley is cool. Hard to believe he's four already. They grow up so fast. Heh. I forgot to take a picture of him. He's that cool. People usually just take pictures of him.
I get to see Jesse and Jason's cool company the next morning and say hi to Jason. Nice place, man! No seriously. Nice job y'all have done there!
Get to borrow a little bit of high bandwidth and a corner office (haha), "Hey boss, I'm working from Nebraska today. See you on Monday." (There are plusses to working in IT, sometimes! Bandwidth, my laptop, and VPN connection and I'm pretty much "at my desk" other than missing the piles of telecom routing papers and old boxes of Windows XP that haven't been touched in years.)
And yes, I did have to take the slide from the 2nd floor to the first floor for the company morning meeting.
Yes, there's a slide. No, it's not optional. Not even for guests! LOL!
Jesse jokes that if something is going on he's had to take the slide with his laptop before. That's a funny mental photo.
I'm so surprised I forget to take a photo of the slide.
Jesse and I both get done with real work for the afternoon and he locks me in a room for ground school. Really. He had to badge in when he left for a minute! (Haha. Ok I wasn't really locked in. But he was locked OUT for a second.
)
He whips out an Advisory Circular (uh oh now it's serious) on his laptop and starts the interrogation process. "What day is it? Who is the current President?" (Wait, I think he must be checking for a concussion from the ride down the slide...) And other FAA kinda questions. "What is your name? What is your quest? What is your favorite color?" It's all over fairly quickly. (I didn't even feel the needle when he implanted the TSA tracking chip!)
We go back to the airport. Launch into the wild blue. Fly for half an hour to reach the end of the short runway at Lincoln. We are only planning an hour. Sheesh! He says things like, "Okay give me a steep turn either direction and roll out west." I say things like, "Huh? I thought you were flying this thing!?"
Power on stalls are the usual buffet, bump, buffet, still won't break, keep pulling, bump, buffet... "Ok that's enough of that, recover."
There are plusses to flying a Robertson STOL 182 near sea level. Haha. Stupid thing will just hang there on the prop with a high sink rate. It secretly wants to be an air show jet, going straight up. The Walter Mitty of Cessna 182s...
Steep turns under the hood and some other hood work. I can tell my brain ain't going fast enough for an IPC but the airplane stays right side up, anyway. And we're not doing an IPC this flight.
Land. Jesse writes some magic scribbles in my green paper book. Looks like Elvish to me. Can't read it. CFI Tiny Print Font.
They apparently teach you how to write tinier than a typewriter at CFI school. Says aircraft control was good, couple of flights would bang out the IPC. Can stick around in Nebraska for another day if I feel like it.
I figure it's time to head home. I like Nebraska but not that much! Weather is good, the Nebraska Curse didn't break the airplane (this time), wifey probably would appreciate me getting home to pick up her truck from the shop that I said I'd do today. Fix her iPhone again. (Hey, she had the Subaru, I didn't make her walk! And Wifi calling!) Read PoA. You know, important stuff!
Remember that there's tradition in Lincoln. Started by David White. Must eat Big Texas cinnamon roll from the machine. Go stick a dollar in.
Denied! Damn. It's stuck. Vending machine makes a PIREP for moderate turbulence inside the FBO. Won't budge. Can't break tradition!!! Damn.
Realize that fake chocolate lard covered mini donuts are angled just right to push on Big Texas. Put another dollar in. Buy donuts. Donuts push Big Texas out! Victory!
Eat Big Texas and donuts. Wonder if either one will trigger a Special Issuance medical next time around. Oh well, can't deal with that right now.
Call airplane co-owner. "Can you help with that other frozen chock?" He says he will head over and unstick it. My co-owners ROCK!
Clearance Delivery asks if I will say hi to KAPA controllers. Says she's looking forward to getting back out to KAPA to visit them. Gives me her initials to authenticate message. (Controllers sign off on internal land lines with their initials for tracking who it was on recordings. Seriously. She's "Juliet Victor", by the way. I scribble on scratchpad in Foreflight. Mental note not to hit clear button before telling APA controllers.)
Climb out of Lincoln and check the iPad for ground speed. 97 knots. Son of a...
I hate winter westbound. Really?!
Listen to a UPS Airbus whining that the mountain wave was strong enough that the autothrottles and autopilot lost 300'. Poor baby. I'm doing 100 knots down here, and you're drinking galley coffee and whining to ZDV. At least he isn't asking for ride reports to get a better altitude for the boxes in back that have more leg room than United. Haha. Hey wait. It's UPS. He doesn't have galley coffee. Sucker.
After a while, I descend. Maybe I can find only a 20 knot headwind a little lower. Lower. At night. I do the math. I can glide 4 miles from this altitude. Look at chart. Closest airport is five miles. Hmm. Of
course it is.
Check engine gauges. Imagine I hear roughness. Let's see, fly higher and glide to airport when engine quits or not have to land in Akron for gas. Sigh. Low and slow but slightly faster than higher and slower it is.
Try that in your damn Airbus! Whiners!
Figure out how to make a HUD out of the iPad mini. Note: Not nice to use the mag compass as a prop for iPad and definitely voids your compass correction card. Child of the magenta line...
(Edit: yeah I was so bored I even put it in track up. And I turned to the right a bit while taking the photo. And no I didn't have a VOR tuned at this point. /U sucks sometimes. We should put a GPS in.)
Get to Aurora Reservoir. Bumps start. YGBFKM. 8+ hours of the smoothest flying ever in the last two days, and continuous light chop from 10 minutes out, all the way to the base turn at KAPA 17L? Tighten seat belt.
Cleared to land. Ask controller if he has time for a message. Tell him JV working Clearance Delivery in KLNK wanted to say hi. He sounds non-plussed but I'm sure he knows half the damn planet is listening on LiveATC.
Anyway, message delivered JV, during the base to final turn. I did my part in the national message relay system by avian human interface.
Taxi to hangar. Shut down. Flash light pointed at me. Airplane co-owner came back over because he heard me talking to Approach on LiveATC. (I told you everyone was listening...) Helps put airplane away. We chat for a bit. Haven't seen him in a while.
He gives me a quick ride over to where I parked my truck. He has a newish BMW. XDrive. It shuts off the engine and restarts it going through the automatic ramp gate. That's kinda cool. Acts like a hybrid but not really a hybrid.
Call Karen. Grab a sandwich in Parker on the way home. Take magic green paper book in and put it away awaiting another aviation adventure.
* Any or all of the above my be fiction, have stretched the truth, or omitted to protect the innocent. The only part I can prove is true is that tiny print and a signature in the magic green book. And that there really is a slide from the 2nd floor to the 1st in a building in Lincoln, NE.
Of course I do! I love Lincoln in January! (I lie. Hahaha. I'm having flashbacks to -10F during the Instrument Rating. There's a certain amount of PTSD associated with it. Doc says it'll get better with therapy. But I never go.)
Go preflight the airplane. Chocks frozen to floor. Denver Jet Center thinks my idea of tugging the airplane over the chocks isn't as smart as their idea of running a pot of hot water through the coffee pot. Hmm. Yeah, that's a better idea. Fuel truck rolls up with said pot of water. Chocks halfway released. Truck guy helps me push it over one chock instead of two. Half a win.
Mental note, new hangar leaks. Water freezes. No more chocks in hangar in below freezing temps.
Jesse takes his life into his own hands. Let's old DenverPilot fly him to Lincoln while doing that CFI thing, you know, sitting there not screaming too loud. Gives pointers like, "You going to leave flaps down?" Nice guy. Helpful.
We arrive in Lincoln. I have a Tweet waiting on my phone from Stephanie Rust @rustysunshine, a ZDV controller and fun person on Twitter... "Hey, was that you in my airspace over Nebraska?"
Why yes, it was! VFR even. Asking for extra services on the mid shift late at night. Aren't we nice? You were our controller?! Wow! How about that tailwind? Wheee! 155 knots GS in a 182! Thanks for vectoring all the other aircraft far far away. Haha.
Jesse hands me a checklist for this thing called a "guest bed". I let him know I'm current and qualified on the type. Haha. Bentley the wonder dog woofs his welcome and shows me his Kong and he and I play tug of war for a couple of minutes.
He loves his Kong. He'd be cool with playing tug all night. Bentley is cool. Hard to believe he's four already. They grow up so fast. Heh. I forgot to take a picture of him. He's that cool. People usually just take pictures of him.
I get to see Jesse and Jason's cool company the next morning and say hi to Jason. Nice place, man! No seriously. Nice job y'all have done there!
Get to borrow a little bit of high bandwidth and a corner office (haha), "Hey boss, I'm working from Nebraska today. See you on Monday." (There are plusses to working in IT, sometimes! Bandwidth, my laptop, and VPN connection and I'm pretty much "at my desk" other than missing the piles of telecom routing papers and old boxes of Windows XP that haven't been touched in years.)
And yes, I did have to take the slide from the 2nd floor to the first floor for the company morning meeting.
Yes, there's a slide. No, it's not optional. Not even for guests! LOL!
Jesse jokes that if something is going on he's had to take the slide with his laptop before. That's a funny mental photo.
I'm so surprised I forget to take a photo of the slide.
Jesse and I both get done with real work for the afternoon and he locks me in a room for ground school. Really. He had to badge in when he left for a minute! (Haha. Ok I wasn't really locked in. But he was locked OUT for a second.
)He whips out an Advisory Circular (uh oh now it's serious) on his laptop and starts the interrogation process. "What day is it? Who is the current President?" (Wait, I think he must be checking for a concussion from the ride down the slide...) And other FAA kinda questions. "What is your name? What is your quest? What is your favorite color?" It's all over fairly quickly. (I didn't even feel the needle when he implanted the TSA tracking chip!)
We go back to the airport. Launch into the wild blue. Fly for half an hour to reach the end of the short runway at Lincoln. We are only planning an hour. Sheesh! He says things like, "Okay give me a steep turn either direction and roll out west." I say things like, "Huh? I thought you were flying this thing!?"
Power on stalls are the usual buffet, bump, buffet, still won't break, keep pulling, bump, buffet... "Ok that's enough of that, recover."
There are plusses to flying a Robertson STOL 182 near sea level. Haha. Stupid thing will just hang there on the prop with a high sink rate. It secretly wants to be an air show jet, going straight up. The Walter Mitty of Cessna 182s...
Steep turns under the hood and some other hood work. I can tell my brain ain't going fast enough for an IPC but the airplane stays right side up, anyway. And we're not doing an IPC this flight.
Land. Jesse writes some magic scribbles in my green paper book. Looks like Elvish to me. Can't read it. CFI Tiny Print Font.
They apparently teach you how to write tinier than a typewriter at CFI school. Says aircraft control was good, couple of flights would bang out the IPC. Can stick around in Nebraska for another day if I feel like it.
I figure it's time to head home. I like Nebraska but not that much! Weather is good, the Nebraska Curse didn't break the airplane (this time), wifey probably would appreciate me getting home to pick up her truck from the shop that I said I'd do today. Fix her iPhone again. (Hey, she had the Subaru, I didn't make her walk! And Wifi calling!) Read PoA. You know, important stuff!
Remember that there's tradition in Lincoln. Started by David White. Must eat Big Texas cinnamon roll from the machine. Go stick a dollar in.
Denied! Damn. It's stuck. Vending machine makes a PIREP for moderate turbulence inside the FBO. Won't budge. Can't break tradition!!! Damn.
Realize that fake chocolate lard covered mini donuts are angled just right to push on Big Texas. Put another dollar in. Buy donuts. Donuts push Big Texas out! Victory!
Eat Big Texas and donuts. Wonder if either one will trigger a Special Issuance medical next time around. Oh well, can't deal with that right now.
Call airplane co-owner. "Can you help with that other frozen chock?" He says he will head over and unstick it. My co-owners ROCK!
Clearance Delivery asks if I will say hi to KAPA controllers. Says she's looking forward to getting back out to KAPA to visit them. Gives me her initials to authenticate message. (Controllers sign off on internal land lines with their initials for tracking who it was on recordings. Seriously. She's "Juliet Victor", by the way. I scribble on scratchpad in Foreflight. Mental note not to hit clear button before telling APA controllers.)
Climb out of Lincoln and check the iPad for ground speed. 97 knots. Son of a...
I hate winter westbound. Really?!
Listen to a UPS Airbus whining that the mountain wave was strong enough that the autothrottles and autopilot lost 300'. Poor baby. I'm doing 100 knots down here, and you're drinking galley coffee and whining to ZDV. At least he isn't asking for ride reports to get a better altitude for the boxes in back that have more leg room than United. Haha. Hey wait. It's UPS. He doesn't have galley coffee. Sucker.
After a while, I descend. Maybe I can find only a 20 knot headwind a little lower. Lower. At night. I do the math. I can glide 4 miles from this altitude. Look at chart. Closest airport is five miles. Hmm. Of
course it is.
Check engine gauges. Imagine I hear roughness. Let's see, fly higher and glide to airport when engine quits or not have to land in Akron for gas. Sigh. Low and slow but slightly faster than higher and slower it is.
Try that in your damn Airbus! Whiners!
Figure out how to make a HUD out of the iPad mini. Note: Not nice to use the mag compass as a prop for iPad and definitely voids your compass correction card. Child of the magenta line...
(Edit: yeah I was so bored I even put it in track up. And I turned to the right a bit while taking the photo. And no I didn't have a VOR tuned at this point. /U sucks sometimes. We should put a GPS in.)
Get to Aurora Reservoir. Bumps start. YGBFKM. 8+ hours of the smoothest flying ever in the last two days, and continuous light chop from 10 minutes out, all the way to the base turn at KAPA 17L? Tighten seat belt.
Cleared to land. Ask controller if he has time for a message. Tell him JV working Clearance Delivery in KLNK wanted to say hi. He sounds non-plussed but I'm sure he knows half the damn planet is listening on LiveATC.
Anyway, message delivered JV, during the base to final turn. I did my part in the national message relay system by avian human interface.
Taxi to hangar. Shut down. Flash light pointed at me. Airplane co-owner came back over because he heard me talking to Approach on LiveATC. (I told you everyone was listening...) Helps put airplane away. We chat for a bit. Haven't seen him in a while.
He gives me a quick ride over to where I parked my truck. He has a newish BMW. XDrive. It shuts off the engine and restarts it going through the automatic ramp gate. That's kinda cool. Acts like a hybrid but not really a hybrid.
Call Karen. Grab a sandwich in Parker on the way home. Take magic green paper book in and put it away awaiting another aviation adventure.
* Any or all of the above my be fiction, have stretched the truth, or omitted to protect the innocent. The only part I can prove is true is that tiny print and a signature in the magic green book. And that there really is a slide from the 2nd floor to the 1st in a building in Lincoln, NE.
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Great story
