Police incompetence is rampant - and this comes from a former County Coroner and Police Surgeon and someone who is a supporter of the police (at least the competent ones)...
Friday night about 8PM I saw lights being flashed across my house windows - We live in the woods a quarter mile off the road... We don't get lights flashing across our windows at night....
Going to the back door and flipping on the 500 watt Halogen spotlight I have mounted above the door (to blind people when I am uncertain who is out there at night) I see 3 officers huddled together doing the "deer in the headlights" routine about 15 feet from my doorway... I quickly slip the pump gun back behind the settee and open the door...
Had I been a nut job they would have been the lead story on Headline News at CNN an hour later... (I hate officers who are stupid, incompetent, nincompoops, grrrrrr!)
Instead I merely said, "Hello, can I help you?"
The lead one said, "are you 'so and so'...
I said, "Yes."
He says - with that insulting super politeness they like to use to indicate their contempt - "Sir, I am taking you to jail for three unpaid traffic violations."
"Really?" - was the only thing that came to mind at that instant... I instantly understood the name of the game... You arrest someone after court hours on Friday and they spend 3 nights in the slammer before getting a hearing... This is a favorite maneuver by officers to harass someone they don't like...
And for a split second I was tempted to say, "I want a lawyer." and let them do it... I would call Jeffery Fieger and he would show up for the Monday morning hearing at the courthouse and present the prosecutor with a ten million dollar lawsuit for false imprisonment which he had filed with the County Clerk two floors down just minutes before... But, old habits die hard and I do identify with the law enforcement community - good officers put their lives on the line for peanuts in pay...
So, I dropped into my "I am in charge here and you had better listen" persona from my days as the Coroner... I immediately went after the officer in front (he I mentally named Larry, the other two were Moe and Curly)
"Look sonny, I have not had a traffic citation since long before you were pooping in your diapers." That made him blink...
"My full legal name is xxx xxx xxx, and my date of birth is yy yy yyyy. So if the arrest warrant, that you had better have in your pocket, does not match up you just committed false arrest!"
At this point they actually back up a step (I gotcha now.) He digs the paper out and sure enough it does not match... Now the tails go down and you never saw a more sorry looking bunch of dogs, errrr officers, stumbling over themselves to apologize...
Lessee, we got, criminal trespass in the nighttime while armed, false arrest, extreme mental abuse, and loss of consortium for my wife... Got to be worth millions
One even goes so far as to say, "Gee you have a really nice house here" - as though I give a rats azz what he thinks about my house...
Anyway, I remain in my professor lecturing the students voice and tell them to be careful and not drive off into the pond while going around the turn in the woods as I did not want to have to explain how three deputies disappeared without a trace... This is also a message that indicates I am the alpha dog in this here pack... They depart still mumbling apologies...
Monday, I am going to the Sheriff's office to have a little chat with him (he ain't a gonna enjoy it, Maud) as to how he came within a heartbeat of having 3 dead officers because they are too stoopid to live...
Then we will discuss basic police work in that the fella with the same name they thought they were arresting is at least 20 years younger than me and left Michigan years ago... Had the county officers thought to have a 10 second conversation with the township police (who know all this) there would not have been an embarrassing incident...
denny-o