Wedding Imminent

Bill Jennings said:
Congrats! Sleep now, sleep often, as sometimes there won't be much sleep that 1st year. And, as they say, it goes fast. Yesterday girl was born, today she's 16 and driving, tomorrow she'll be off to college, and next week she'll be married with her own family...
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Science has discovered the cause of this . . .send me $29.99 and your SSN and I'll rush you the secrets of non-reproduction . . .

Just kidding - good on ya Mate; it isn't as tough as you might hear it is. You'll both figure it out quick, and get a sustainable routine down in no time. All happiness!
 
So was she born on the 20th or 21st?

Just trying to figure out *exactly* when she turns 18. :p :p
 
Now.... THIS is how to start a thread and follow that sucker THROUGH!!! Hadn't joined the forum when it started and saw it for the first time today. Wonderful! Congratulations!
 
Good on ya Overdrive... Hope they gave momma the good drugs so she wouldn't threaten to kill you while she was in labor....
 
Okay. With that out of the way - thanks for all the congratulations and well wishes. Sleep has been crazy and my worry levels have been off the chart. Getting up the instant she makes any noises whatsoever. It's hard to get used to. She had her first pediatrician appointment today and she's normal and healthy.

If you guys have any extra nuggets of wisdom for this time of her life other than "don't let your mother in law put googley eyes on your child", I would love to hear it.
 
overdrive148 said:
Okay. With that out of the way - thanks for all the congratulations and well wishes. Sleep has been crazy and my worry levels have been off the chart. Getting up the instant she makes any noises whatsoever. It's hard to get used to. She had her first pediatrician appointment today and she's normal and healthy.

If you guys have any extra nuggets of wisdom for this time of her life other than "don't let your mother in law put googley eyes on your child", I would love to hear it.
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Just enjoy it. When she hits 11 years old you’ll be wishing she was this size again so you can carry her in your arms, rather than impatiently trying to get her to do things that she refuses. And you’ll be wishing she only coos instead of hearing the backtalk about how you just don’t understand anything and parents are the dumbest in the world.

Wanna trade?? :D:D:D
 
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A lot of modern parents also refuse my other advice. We never had our kids sleep in our room as babies and we never let them sleep in our bed with us. I don’t think co-sleeping arrangements are healthy.

Sleep schedules are key. Stick to them. Don’t be the parent at walmart at 10pm with your kid. They should be asleep.
 
NealRomeoGolf said:
Sleep schedules are key. Stick to them. Don’t be the parent at walmart at 10pm with your kid. They should be asleep.
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So much this. We were/are kind of sleep Nazis. But our son is so much better on his sleep schedule. If he's late to bed, it seems to affect him for a couple of days afterwards. As a baby, putting them to sleep late will counterintuitively cause them to wake up earlier. They don't sleep in to make up for the lost sleep until much older. Get them on a sleep schedule and stick to it. Really. It's good for them and it's good for you.
 
NealRomeoGolf said:
A lot of modern parents also refuse my other advice. We never had our kids sleep in our room as babies and we never let them sleep in our bed with us. I don’t think co-sleeping arrangements are healthy.

Sleep schedules are key. Stick to them. Don’t be the parent at walmart at 10pm with your kid. They should be asleep.
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Agreed. My wife has been Sleep Nazi Fuhrer and it works well. We had the newborns in our room in a bassinet for the first six months to make feedings easier, but transitioned them to their bedroom/nursery at 6 months once they were sleep trained. The way our house is set up, it's a long distance to walk from the Master bedroom to the nursery at 3am and the baby monitor signal was pretty sketchy.

PPC1052 said:
So much this. We were/are kind of sleep Nazis. But our son is so much better on his sleep schedule. If he's late to bed, it seems to affect him for a couple of days afterwards. As a baby, putting them to sleep late will counter-intuitively cause them to wake up earlier. They don't sleep in to make up for the lost sleep until much older. Get them on a sleep schedule and stick to it. Really. It's good for them and it's good for you.
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Seconded. Our 3 yr old still has to be in bed by 7:45-8pm at the latest except on special occasions. Our recently born son (5 months old) has been sleeping through the night for the most part since the first six weeks or so. I will say that adjusting their feeding schedule helps with that, as we often wake him up at 9pm or so to "top him off" with milk so he'll sleep through the night.
 
overdrive148 said:
Okay. With that out of the way - thanks for all the congratulations and well wishes. Sleep has been crazy and my worry levels have been off the chart. Getting up the instant she makes any noises whatsoever. It's hard to get used to. She had her first pediatrician appointment today and she's normal and healthy.

If you guys have any extra nuggets of wisdom for this time of her life other than "don't let your mother in law put googley eyes on your child", I would love to hear it.
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1. The first 4-6 weeks are the toughest for parents and baby getting sleep. Everyone is new to the game, so it takes a bit to figure out what position they fall asleep easiest in, what routine works, etc.
2. Sometimes baby cries and it's tough to figure out what the problem is. Always check hunger, wet/dirty diaper, gassy, and anything pinching/irritating skin/causing pain. Many times they cry when they are fighting sleep/tired. Just remember that they can't verbalize what's wrong, and the crying will wear on you. When you're at your wits end and getting angry, set the baby down or pass them off to the wife. Even if you have to set the baby down crying by themselves for a few minutes while you walk away and calm down, it's better than continuing when you've lost your patience. The dye-free Mylicon has worked really well for us to help with any gas pains, and it shouldn't harm the baby with multiple doses, when necessary. We also use a good bit of Desitin for diaper cream when necessary.
3. As a father, just help out where you can. Clean bottles/baby supplies, offer to change diapers every time, burp them when Momma has finished feeding (if she breast feeds), etc. Moms typically bear most of the burden early-on, so taking that weight off them when possible makes for a happy wife/mother.
4. Just enjoy it. Play with baby, talk to her, make her smile/laugh. That's the stuff you'll miss when she grows up. Remember that this "season" of your life is actually very short, so take it in. She'll be up and walking in a year and then the real fun starts!
 
NealRomeoGolf said:
Just enjoy it. When she hits 11 years old you’ll be wishing she was this size again so you can carry her in your arms, rather than impatiently trying to get her to do things that she refuses. And you’ll be wishing she only coos instead of hearing the backtalk about how you just don’t understand anything and parents are the dumbest in the world.

Wanna trade?? :D:D:D
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Cooing? Don't you mean crying? Or screaming their bloody lungs out how can something so small make so much noise? I think you're far enough away that you've forgotten about getting 2 hours of sleep a night (on a good night) for the first few years combined with non-stop ear-piercing screaming directly into your ear (one of my daughters has contributed notably to my hearing loss). ;)

Or your kids were much better sleepers than mine ever were.

The newborn phase was great. I am also happy that we are done with it. Yeah, all phases have their challenges, but it's fun to watch my kids develop into their own people and get to where I can be doing things more actively with them.

As to the sleep arrangement, every family and every kid is different, so it's not a one size fits all equation (same goes for nap arrangements, discipline, etc). We did cosleeping and I'm glad we did. For us, it worked well. We also still read our kids stories at night and stay until they fall asleep (mostly). Yeah, at first it was very annoying because we couldn't get a lot of other things done in the evenings, but those things will still be there when the kids are bigger, and I'll be happy to have those memories. Our kids don't have confidence, attachment, or security issues. So for our family, it's worked out. Our kids were not good sleepers until about 3 or so. Just how they were.

To @overdrive148 the best advice I can give is that a lot of parents will tell you what they did and say it's the only thing that works, or it's the best, etc. What they really mean is that it's what worked for them and their kid(s), and if mama has an idea of how things ought to be, challenging her is probably not going to work in your favor. Your kid is not their kid (well unless someone screwed up at the hospital) and your wife is not someone else's wife (unless something odd is going on), so getting a bunch of ideas is good, but ultimately figure out what works for you. Kinda like flight instruction. ;)
 
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overdrive148 said:
If you guys have any extra nuggets of wisdom for this time of her life other than "don't let your mother in law put googley eyes on your child", I would love to hear it.
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Don't forget your wife. She needs your help and support now more than ever.

And enjoy! Stressful, yes... but this time in your life will make wonderful memories...

-Skip (two girls, 37 and 32!)
 
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