Tough thread to read. As much as I'm a proponent of the utilization of a range of sims to reduce the time & cost to train, I definitely think you're better starting in the real airplane, with a CFII, then use the sim to hone those skills (with and without an instructor present), except for those tasks which require specific motor skills, or the building of muscle memory.
I'm posting this in case people read this and think that the online flying networks (VATSIM/PilotEdge, etc) promote the 'do it all yourself in the sim first' approach. We don't. We generally advise our users who are student pilots to not practice much beyond what they've already covered with their instructor.
Instrument training is a little different, though, once you have your primary training out of the way, I think. I've now seen countless examples of people who self-taught themselves IFR, then went for their training and had a huge head start, allowing them to focus on some of the bigger picture items (such as ADM) with their instructor. That way, they come out of the IFR training better equipped to handle real world IFR than most newly-minted instrument pilots.
FWIW, this same user was posting similar questions on the PilotEdge forum. We tried hard to encourage him to get the real world process started and then augment it with sim training, but I'm not sure how much impact we made. Judging by this thread...not much.
All that said, the number of people who feel simulators have little to no place in primary training is surprising. If flying was 99% muscle memory and 1% decision making, I'd agree completely...but it just isn't the case. Yes, a low end sim running FSX is not going to help much with the subtle nuances of the last 3ft prior to touchdown in a real plane, but all the decision making that goes into each flight, there are huge gains in efficiency to be realized with a sim.