Two Men Arrested for Allegedly Trying to Have Sex With Cows

Zeldman

Zeldman

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Two Men Arrested for Allegedly Trying to Have Sex With Cows

By Frida Garza


1 hour ago




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new_york_arrest_kqyi4u.jpg





Image via Newsy via HuffPost

Michael Jones, 35, and Reid Fontaine, 31, are accused of sexually abusing several cows in Herkimer County, New York, and have been arrested and charged with misdemeanor sexual misconduct, the Huffington Post reports.
When a farmer (whose name has not been released) noticed that his cows were acting more anxious than usual and weren't producing as much milk, he set up a surveillance camera on his property to investigate. That's when he discovered Fontaine and Jones sexually abusing his cows.
After seeing the incriminating footage, the farmer contacted the state police, who arrested Jones and Fontaine as part of their own investigation. Jones has admitted to the police that he agreed to film Fontaine attempting to have sex with several cows.
The men have been released on an appearance ticket.


Florida Man Arrested for Violating Stuffed Animal in Walmart

There are some things you just don't do in a Walmart (or anywhere), like f*** a stuffed animal. This gross act got a Florida man with wanton disregard for his freedom and decency arrested yesterday afternoon.
The Smoking Gun reports that 19-year-old Sean Johnson was seen taking the stuffed animal from the shelf at the Brooksville, Fla. location, then sauntering over to the housewares section where he had sex with it—to completion. Afterwards, he placed the ejaculate-coated stuffed animal on top of a bed and exited the store.
Although Walmart security couldn't corral him, he was caught on camera and eventually apprehended by members of the Brooksville Police Department. Finally feeling remorse, Johnson told police he "[needs] to think before what [he does]," adding that he is "extremely sorry."
He was charged with criminal mischief and indecent exposure.



And I suppose some people will just say this is the new normal.
 
No....No....No...

Wait for it, obama will be "evolving" on these and many other subjects, very soon...
 
Zeldman said:
And I suppose some people will just say this is the new normal.
Click to expand...


Yeah, there's never been any sexual deviance in the past. :rolleyes:

And I didn't see anything about these people being gay, since I'm assuming we're to believe this has something to do with Friday's SCOTUS decision?
 
If they owned the cows, let em have at it. But since they weren't the owners, jail em for destruction of property.
 
Can't wait for these types to march on the capitol.
 
EdFred said:
If they owned the cows, let em have at it. But since they weren't the owners, jail em for destruction of property.
Click to expand...

Destruction? I think you give the perpetrators too much credit.
 
Did they marry the cows? A good friend of mine married one. I never brought the subject up.
 
Donkey sex seems to be a tradition in some parts of Colombia: https://youtu.be/_VKWLC87Uzw

I think the guys who got caught just wanted to celebrate this tradition, but could not find donkeys. Cows therefore had to suffice... :D
 
Seems consensual...then again there may be a statutory issue how old were the cows...
 
Musta' been some tame milkers.

My cows would turn the tables and stick a horn up somewhere...
 
How do 2 dudes agree to do this together?

I can almost see like one dude has a thing for cows but you would think he would keep this weird secret to himself. How does one dude convince a buddy to join him on something like this?

And wouldn't his buddy also be like "Uh no EdFred, that's ****ing sick dude" even if he was into that sort of thing?
 
I mean I guess if the mood is right.



















The moo.....d. :)
 
bartmc said:
Someone actually clicked the link and watched that :hairraise:
Click to expand...

The story is actually true. They also interview a therapist who says that this is not uncommon in a number of other cultures.
 
This is supposed to be fallout from the SCOTUS decision?

Fail.

Look at the date on the Huffpost article.
 
Had it been sheep instead of cows, I'd have suspected Aggie Mike. :smilewinkgrin:
 
:confused::confused::confused: Why? I've done artificial insemination on cows, your whole arm fits in there. :confused:
 
Henning said:
:confused::confused::confused: Why? I've done artificial insemination on cows, your whole arm fits in there. :confused:
Click to expand...

Forget Mike Rowe, you need your own TV show. Is there any job you haven't done? :lol:
 
DJTorrente said:
Forget Mike Rowe, you need your own TV show. Is there any job you haven't done? :lol:
Click to expand...

Heck, I still own half a ranch that my ex is on.:lol: When you have a ranch, you can't afford to pay other people to do stuff, so either rent a bull or buy semen and glove up.;)
 
Warlock said:
Seems consensual...then again there may be a statutory issue how old were the cows...
Click to expand...

I wonder what the standard is, given a cow's lifespan and breeding cycle. Can't be much over a couple of years.
 
This is how crazy crap like AIDS, SARS, Ebola, and other weird afflictions get started ...

People ****ing monkeys, dogs, and cattle .... then eating them. :nono:
 
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