Self-studied for mine with the Machado Instrument Survival Manual, then did a truck load of sim flying at home. You don't need an FAA-approved sim to have a beneficial experience.
Arrived at second lesson, picked up IFR clearance, departure and enroute went fine, so we went an shot some approaches. I kept the radio the whole time, instructor never made a single call, and didn't touch the stick. There were a handful of bad habits and misunderstandings (which I anticipated and was very open to fixing)
The first lesson was verifying basic attitude instrument flying skills (VFR, under the hood).
End result...legal minimum time (plus 0.7) for simulated/actual instrument. Also, legal minimum time for time flown with instructor vs safety pilot. More importantly, I was ready to fly in the system safely.
There are many ways to get your instrument rating. You're doing the right thing by asking questions and looking into options.
One piece of advice I would offer that could save you some time and money...if you can't pick up a random approach plate and articulate exactly how you would fly the approach (in terms of altitudes, courses, how you'll navigate, etc), and trace the flight path with your finger over that approach, both for vectors to final, vectors to a fix along the approach (they can do that now), or the full approach, you don't need to be in an airplane or a simulator, you need to be reading/studying until you can.
If you can't articulate that flight track to an instructor, you're not going to be able to fly it, period. That's a big part of the battle right there. Once you really have a grasp of that material, then it becomes a matter of utilizing the avionics in your airplane efficiently to fly that track and manage your energy state throughout the profile.
And yes, shooting approaches shouldn't be the #1 task when you get started, make sure you can fly the airplane by reference to instruments first, then worry about approaches.