Punjab fail

AggieMike88

Touchdown! Greaser!
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The original "I don't know it all" of aviation.
From the local aviator facebook page

(Heavy Indian accent) "Hello, Mr. Jason? That's me. "Yes, I'm calling from the warranty department for your F150." I've never owned a F150. "Oh, so you sold that vehicle?" Sure. "Did you replace this vehicle?" Yup. "What is your current vehicle?" A Cherokee 235. "Oh great! I'd love to tell you about expanded warranty coverage." Great! (Punjab rattles on for 3 minutes) "Mr. Jason, what year is your Cherokee? 64. "64?" Yup. "Hmmm...." Hello?? (Stammers and stutters) "Is this vehicle a Jeep Cherokee?" No, Piper Cherokee. (More stammering and stuttering) "Is this Cherokee a jet?" Nope. "Ummmm.....ok. Have a great day."
WIN!!​
 
From the local aviator facebook page

(Heavy Indian accent) "Hello, Mr. Jason? That's me. "Yes, I'm calling from the warranty department for your F150." I've never owned a F150. "Oh, so you sold that vehicle?" Sure. "Did you replace this vehicle?" Yup. "What is your current vehicle?" A Cherokee 235. "Oh great! I'd love to tell you about expanded warranty coverage." Great! (Punjab rattles on for 3 minutes) "Mr. Jason, what year is your Cherokee? 64. "64?" Yup. "Hmmm...." Hello?? (Stammers and stutters) "Is this vehicle a Jeep Cherokee?" No, Piper Cherokee. (More stammering and stuttering) "Is this Cherokee a jet?" Nope. "Ummmm.....ok. Have a great day."
WIN!!​
:rockon:
Yeah.... frackin' with telemarketers can certainly be a blast at times.
 
That'd be cool though... to get an extended warranty on a plane for a price less than the plane.
 
I typically tell them that I just totaled the car. Or that the car was stolen.

Haven't had them call me of over a year now.
 
I explain that the call is being recorded for the FBI because using the phone system for a scam is interstate trade and a Federal felony.

They hang up really fast.
 
I explain that the call is being recorded for the FBI because using the phone system for a scam is interstate trade and a Federal felony.

They hang up really fast.

Lately I have been answering the phone, "Police Department, Detective Johnson...." in a deep, authoritive tone of voice.

Very rarely will someone want to continue the conversation. I'll try the FBI recording on the next one...:lol::lol::lol:
 
Last time I got a call from one of those guys it was about a car that I haven't owned in like 7 years.

He asked how many miles I had on it and I told him "400,000". There was silence and then a "Oh, we don't cover over...XXX miles"

I told him I was disappointed and ended the call :).
 
Lately I have been answering the phone, "Police Department, Detective Johnson...." in a deep, authoritive tone of voice.

Very rarely will someone want to continue the conversation. I'll try the FBI recording on the next one...:lol::lol::lol:
I also use the same line when [microsoft|windows] computer security calls. I used to let them go on and on then point out I had no Start button at the bottom left because I'm running unix.

Sidebar: Reported today that Oracle has lowered the boom on SUN. Production has ceased on new servers. Wonder how long Solaris support will survived. Or MySQL support. Java EE has moved out to an external "foundation".
 
I also use the same line when [microsoft|windows] computer security calls. I used to let them go on and on then point out I had no Start button at the bottom left because I'm running unix.

Sidebar: Reported today that Oracle has lowered the boom on SUN. Production has ceased on new servers. Wonder how long Solaris support will survived. Or MySQL support. Java EE has moved out to an external "foundation".

Yep, friend of mine in that division got his notice last Friday. Along with dozens or maybe multiple dozens of others in Broomfield.
 
During my recent stay at the hospital, there was a nurse from either India or Pakistan. He would come in and ask, "How are you today?" I would respond, "I've had better days".

He never could figure out what I meant...
 
I have a standard response for telemarketers. "You've reached a number included in the Federal Do-not-call-registry. Congratulations, you may be guilty of a felony."

Usually they apologize and give up. but if they continue...

"You are aware that this number is on the Federal Do-not-call-registry and you have decided to continue your unwanted activity, thus you are acting with intent. You are therefore engaging in activity that is contraindicated by Federal law. I need the address from which you are placing this call, and I'll need to speak to your supervisor right away."

Now, they usual bail long before I get done with this. But if they're still trying to make their sale pitch, or stammering, or anything else...

"Failure to cooperate could result in charges of federal obstruction of justice, which can carry a one year Federal prison sentence and a quarter million dollar fine."

One time I did actually get to say this to someone identified as a supervisor. It shut them up pretty quickly. Fun, effective, and it has the advantage of being completely true.
 
I have a standard response for telemarketers. "You've reached a number included in the Federal Do-not-call-registry. Congratulations, you may be guilty of a felony."

Usually they apologize and give up. but if they continue...

"You are aware that this number is on the Federal Do-not-call-registry and you have decided to continue your unwanted activity, thus you are acting with intent. You are therefore engaging in activity that is contraindicated by Federal law. I need the address from which you are placing this call, and I'll need to speak to your supervisor right away."

Now, they usual bail long before I get done with this. But if they're still trying to make their sale pitch, or stammering, or anything else...

"Failure to cooperate could result in charges of federal obstruction of justice, which can carry a one year Federal prison sentence and a quarter million dollar fine."

One time I did actually get to say this to someone identified as a supervisor. It shut them up pretty quickly. Fun, effective, and it has the advantage of being completely true.
If the same company continues to call (had one today) I tell them the call is considered harassment under state and federal law. The next voices they will hear is the FBI, the cops and my lawyer.
 
"I charge $100 to speak with telemarketers, how do you wish to pay?"

I have nomorobo which gets 95% of the robo calls - but the 5% that get through - that throws them off script in a hurry.

Well, i'm not well, what?

"If you try to market to me without paying, you become personally liable. Now, I just want your employer to pay, who do you work ofr?"

Now, 9 of 10 of those just hang up. And the Caller ID is always spoofed - so they're on to the next sucker. But in that 1 of 10 - they make it fun.
 
If the same company continues to call (had one today) I tell them the call is considered harassment under state and federal law. The next voices they will hear is the FBI, the cops and my lawyer.
you'll never find them, so its irrelevant.
 
I just don't answer if I don't recognize the number.
 
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