Ode to Kent, Kate, Pete, Jamie and other cheeseheads

[AdamZ]

Just got this today

COLD IS A RELATIVE THING. . . . . . .
65 above zero:
Floridians turn on the heat.
People in Wisconsin plant gardens.

60 above zero:
Californians shiver uncontrollably.
People in Wisconsin sunbathe.

50 above zero:
Italian & English cars won't start.
People in Wisconsin drive with the windows down.

40 above zero:
Georgians don coats, thermal underwear, gloves, wool hats.
People in Wisconsin throw on a flannel shirt.

35 above zero:
New York landlords finally turn up the heat.
People in Wisconsin have the last cookout before it gets cold.




20 above Zero
People in Miami all die.
Wisconsinites close the windows.

Zero:
Californians fly away to Mexico .
People in Wisconsin get out their winter coats.

10 below zero:
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Wisconsin are selling cookies door to door.

20 below zero:
Washington DC runs out of hot air.
People in Wisconsin let the dogs sleep indoors.

30 below zero:
Santa Claus abandons the North Pole.
Wisconsinites get upset because they can't start the Snow-mobile.

40 below zero:
ALL atomic motion stops.
People in Wisconsin start saying...'Cold enough fer ya?'

50 below zero:
Hell freezes over.
Wisconsin public schools will open 2 hours late

 

[vontresc]

COLD IS A RELATIVE THING. . . . . . .
50 below zero:
Hell freezes over.
Wisconsin public schools will open 2 hours late

too True...When I was in School the only time we got a day off due to cold was when it was 20 below, and the heating crapped out.

Also if you properly winterize your sled it will start at 40 below

 

[HPNFlyGirl]

How do you guys live in such cold weather?

 

[vontresc]

It's a "Dry Cold"

 

[Ken Ibold]

I remember one winter in Madison when it was sooo cold that a freak March heat wave of 40 had people all outside washing cars and sunbathing. (Unfortunately, that was the winter I rode my motorcycle all winter long. Well, except when it was below zero I'd walk or take a cab. My knees haven't been the same since.)

 

[Capt. Geoffrey Thorpe]

I remember one winter in Madison when it was sooo cold that a freak March heat wave of 40 had people all outside washing cars and sunbathing. (Unfortunately, that was the winter I rode my motorcycle all winter long. Well, except when it was below zero I'd walk or take a cab. My knees haven't been the same since.)

1) Follow a bus. It is noticibly warmer behind them.

2) Grab the cylinder head to warm up your gloves.

3) DO NOT grab the exhaust pipe with your gloves - by the time you realize how much heat is getting through your gloves it's too late.

4) Snow is fun. Ice sucks.

 

[gprellwitz]

3) DO NOT grab the exhaust pipe with your gloves - by the time you realize how much heat is getting through your gloves it's too late.

That sounds like experience talking!

4) Snow is fun. Ice sucks.

Yellow snow REALLY sucks

 

[flyingcheesehead]

How do you guys live in such cold weather?

Same way you live in such hot weather.

I always laugh at people who move south to avoid the cold. They spend as much time and effort getting to air conditioned places in the summer as we do heated places in the winter. And we can put more clothes on to keep out the cold, but what do ya do when it gets hot?

 

[bbchien]

ROTFLMAO!

 

[skyflyer8]

10 below zero:
Hollywood disintegrates.
The Girl Scouts in Wisconsin are selling cookies door to door.

I think the temp was around zero with a wind chill of -15 when a Girl Scout came to the door a couple weeks ago!

 

[The Old Man]

Laugh all you want, but the coldest I've ever been was at Eglin AFB winter of '62-'63. It got to -2 at Pensacola.

No building has anything near adequate heat for that temperature. No one has a stock of adequate clothing for that temperature. The only place you could get warm was in a car with the heater on full blast.

 

[Skip Miller]

Laugh all you want, but the coldest I've ever been was at Eglin AFB winter of '62-'63. It got to -2 at Pensacola.

The coldest weather I’ve ever been in is -40 (your choice, *F or *C).

The coldest I’ve ever been is standing in formation in front of Ney Hall, OCS Newport, at 5:30am on a windy January morning, waiting for permission to enter an empty building for breakfast.

-Skip

 

[Ted]

I always laugh at people who move south to avoid the cold. They spend as much time and effort getting to air conditioned places in the summer as we do heated places in the winter. And we can put more clothes on to keep out the cold, but what do ya do when it gets hot?

That depends on where you live and what the social structure will allow.

I try not to complain about the cold here in Williamsport too much, other than the joking "We can send this back!" This winter has been the coldest so far in Williamsport, but my first summer here I turned on my central air conditioner a total of 4 times. Last summer I didn't turn it on all - only AC use was in the car. Normal temperatures here in winter are in the 15-25F range, occasionally getting up into the 30s/40s and down into the 0s (and high negatives, although the -12F a few weeks ago did throw me).

The fact that the summers are as temperate as they are really is nice. You can work outside without needing a garden hose to replenish your body with water, and going for a bike ride or a walk with the dog doesn't require an immediate shower afterwards.

 

[bluesky74656]

I saw a list like that written for Cleveland years ago... The last entry was:

-500. Hell Freezes Over
The Browns win the superbowl.

 

[Ghery]

Laugh all you want, but the coldest I've ever been was at Eglin AFB winter of '62-'63. It got to -2 at Pensacola.

No building has anything near adequate heat for that temperature. No one has a stock of adequate clothing for that temperature. The only place you could get warm was in a car with the heater on full blast.

The coldest weather I’ve ever been in is -40 (your choice, *F or *C).

The coldest I’ve ever been is standing in formation in front of Ney Hall, OCS Newport, at 5:30am on a windy January morning, waiting for permission to enter an empty building for breakfast.

-Skip

It got down to -60 F at our house in Pullman, WA in the winter of 1968-69. My brother and I went skiing one day when the high in the nearest town was -21 F. I'll never do anything that dumb again. All that said, I'd rather deal with cold weather than super hot weather. I can add a layer. You really don't want me removing too many. At least, not in public.