Doc, this is way longer than I wanted to post here, but I couldn't find a way to make it work by PM. Good luck with your training.
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Becoming a proficient instrument pilot is easier if you (and more importantly, your instructor) start with a basic understanding of what's really important and really different about the new game and the simplest and quickest way to learn to play it.
The most-important concept is that instrument flying is nothing more than an attention-management exercise. You have already learned to cross-check, but the IR training will require further development of those skills. In addition, many other functions (communication, clearances, navigation, avionics, charts and plates, etc.) will require your attention and must be dealt with in a timely manner while you simultaneously continue to fly the plane to precise tolerances.
You will not have the luxury of concentrating on a single task or a single instrument for as long as you would like, and certainly not as long as you have had during your primary training, simply because everything else goes to hell much more quickly. As a result, you must learn to obtain and interpret the information you need from whatever source and return your attention to the primary FTFA task. You'll soon learn that the old adage "eating a turd sandwich is easier if you take small bites" is never more true than for pilots who are learning the new game.
Fixation on a single instrument/gage and failure to develop an orderly and effective plan for attention diversion are the two biggest hurdles for most new instrument pilots. Instructors can easily detect fixation occurrence, because the pilot will invariably jerk the controls to make a quick correction after straying from some assigned parameter of flight. If you catch yourself making jerky corrections, you'll immediately know why it happened and that you must improve on taking small bites and returning your attention to FTFA.
After 30-some years of watching instrument pilots from the right seat or instructor panel in the sim, I'm always surprised by (1) their lack of preparation and (2) their lack of feel.
Lack of preparation is demonstrated in many ways, but the most obvious blunder is that most amateur pilots seem to think that nothing can happen in the cockpit until the engine is running. Only then do they apparently think that clearances can be obtained and copied, frequencies and squawks can be pre-selected, and other nav/com instruments set for departure.
In order to break this habit, I require that the student prepare an inventory of the "stuff" that will be necessary for the flight, and to know its location and sequence of use during the flight. That includes pens, pencils, paper, clipboards, charts, plates, flashlights, sun-shades, sex toys and any other doo-dads that might be necessary during the trip.
A pre-takeoff cluster-fumble is never a pretty thing to watch, and can be avoided with just a few minutes of planning. So I also require the pilot to sit in the cockpit for a few minutes prior to each flight in order to get things organized and set up prior to engine start. This step will require some battery power for a couple of minutes, at which some pilots are aghast. My position is that if the plane’s battery won’t tolerate a few minutes of use prior to start, the pilot shouldn’t be flying the damn thing anyway.
A disorganized or unorganized cockpit is even more disheartening. Pilots should understand that they need some tools to manage the airplane (checklists, etc.) and some tools to manage the trip (charts, plates, other pubs and paper) and develop a method to access them in a timely and orderly manner. Some pilots use a $40 kneeboard, I use a $2 clipboard.
Lack of feel is also obvious in that most pilots obviously think they must look at everything they touch prior to making physical contact with their hand. Only when they develop a conscious method of handling some the non-flying elements by touch will they start to improve. Unfortunately, many instructors don't understand this concept either so the student is doomed to "making it harder than it is" until somebody explains that using the sense of feel is permitted in the cockpit of little airplanes.
A simple example is tuning the VOR. If you depart KADS for KDUA, you will most likely be flying a heading to intercept a radial from Cowboy 115.7. After intercept, you will at some point be cleared direct DUA and wish to change the VOR freq 114.3.
Rather than staring at the VOR like a goat looking at a watch, reach over without looking and place your fingers on the VOR tuning knob. If you don’t know where it is, practice in the dark until you can find it every time. Glance quickly at the current freq setting to determine that you have selected the correct knob, then move your eyes back to the fight instruments. If you need more than a second or two to verify the freq, consider making a visit to your local eye doc.
Once you’re sure, and without looking, click the big knob counter-clockwise once to change from 115 to 114, then click the little knob counterclockwise four clicks to change it from .7 to .3. Verify with a quick glance, then without looking (it will be in the same place as the last time you flew the plane) immediately place your fingers on the audio panel and glance at the correct button or switch for the nav you are tuning (can’t be any number other than 1 or 2 in most GA airplanes) and identify the freq. If necessary, listen until you have internalized the dit-dah pattern, and then quickly check the chart to be sure it’s correct. If you don’t want the Morse code to interfere with your ATC comm function through the headset, simply select the cabin speaker and listen to the dit-dah in the background.
You should already have the chart pre-folded to the correct page, and have some idea where the next fix is located, so verifying the code pattern matches the chart shouldn’t take long, but may take several quick glances rather than one long look if you want to maintain precise control.
In summary, learning to do things in a manner than helps eliminate the most-common problems before they occur is a much better strategy than correcting them later.