Hemorrhoids. Good Lord Almighty

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This is embarrassing

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Regular member here. No pun intended.

I've never had these before and I just thought it was from too much Korean BBQ. I thought I was a little old to be getting diaper rash. I was horrified to figure out it is hemorrhoids.

This is one of the most unpleasant things I've had to deal with, ever. You just can't get comfortable. I bought Prep-H and Tucks. I have heard adding apple cider vinegar and honey to water helps, too. Does it? I am taking Advil now to help the swelling go down a little.

I wouldn't have thought I'm a candidate for these, either. Not overweight, maybe slightly under if anything. Sedentary job that has had a lot of stress in the past 6 months, though.

What else can I do, and how long before the swelling goes away?

Is this the kind of thing that once you do get them, you are always prone to them?
 
Massage them until they recede back within the muscle.
STOP straining when you sit on the toilet <- that has more to do with causation than eating some type of food.
Eat roughage to keep stools SOFT. Do all you can to prevent constipation. Buy Milk of Magnesia by the gallon and use it regularly or stock up and eat copious amounts of dried prunes and blueberries along with only Fibre One (Original, not the flavored stuff) for breakfast
They won't go away until you have them surgically removed
 
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I thought I saw EVERYTHING on this board! Ahh, the proverbial ROID rage! I think a lot of people get them during their lifetime for a variety of reasons. Don't discount the stress you mentioned. It can really run havoc on your health.

For those yet to enjoy the pleasure of the topic, some reading material:

http://www.webmd.com/a-to-z-guides/hemorrhoids-topic-overview
 
This is embarrassing said:
Regular member here. No pun intended.

I've never had these before and I just thought it was from too much Korean BBQ. I thought I was a little old to be getting diaper rash. I was horrified to figure out it is hemorrhoids.

This is one of the most unpleasant things I've had to deal with, ever. You just can't get comfortable. I bought Prep-H and Tucks. I have heard adding apple cider vinegar and honey to water helps, too. Does it? I am taking Advil now to help the swelling go down a little.

I wouldn't have thought I'm a candidate for these, either. Not overweight, maybe slightly under if anything. Sedentary job that has had a lot of stress in the past 6 months, though.

What else can I do, and how long before the swelling goes away?

Is this the kind of thing that once you do get them, you are always prone to them?
Click to expand...


From what I read....

1. Eat a LOT of raw vegetables ( cabbage, lettuce, beet, spinach ) and lots of fiber ( oatmeal, bran flakes, etc..) - REAL vegetable soup is fine too ( not the poison you buy in cans or bags at the supermarket )

2. Don't eat meat, sausage, processed foods, white bread, pastry, etc...

3. Drink plenty of fluids ( light tea )

4. Lukewarm Sitz baths....3 times a day - good hygiene will help prevent the irritation....

5. Lie down on your back - try not to seat on your butt for extended periods

6. No anal sex please...:D
 
They suck. That's all there is to it, and once they're gone, they'll come back.

The best way I found to take care of them is to keep yourself very clean, make heavy and repeated use of the Prep-H, and when you sit for long periods, pick a cheek and sit on it, moving back and forth every so often.

If you have to poop, wait until you absolutely have to poop, instead of trying to force the issue. The longer you wait, the easier it will be to poop without straining.

If you are gassy, don't force your farts out, let them come naturally. Don't eat spicy foods, and eat lots of soothing items that make your butt feel nice. Ice Cream helps a lot.

If you're a woman or a gay man, I'd imagine that butt seks is out of the question. :D

If you can avoid sitting on your keester, do so - laying down feels a hell of a lot better than shifting buttcheeks.
 
SkyHog said:
If you have to poop, wait until you absolutely have to poop, instead of trying to force the issue.
Click to expand...

That's true - try not to strain...

SkyHog said:
The longer you wait, the easier it will be to poop without straining.
Click to expand...

Not true...holding it off for too long causes constipation and worsens the situation...
 
If you buy Preparation H, get a large tube. When the immediate problem is solved, it works well for hair loss. It doesn't promote hair growth, but when you rub it on your head it pulls your scalp closer together so it looks like more.
 
wabower said:
If you buy Preparation H, get a large tube. When the immediate problem is solved, it works well for hair loss. It doesn't promote hair growth, but when you rub it on your head it pulls your scalp closer together so it looks like more.
Click to expand...

That is very disturbing on several levels.
 
Go into the nearest bar and order a Pile Driver.




wait for it......



wait......



wait....






Preparation H and Vodka!



Well, I am indeed sorry to hear your news. Happy New Year - and to all - anyway!

-Skip
 
I know this is serious sh## here but you folks had me laughing my ass off.

I really needed this today and I agree I think I have seen it all on an aviation site now.

Stick a fork in me and call me done.......:lol:
 
I wouldn't overdo the magnesium-based laxatives. Tolerance develops very quickly, and dependency can follow right behind. Once in a while when the plumbing's completely stopped up is okay, but not more than that.

A stool softener like Colace, or fiber-based bulk-forming laxatives like Metamucil, would be a safer choice than any of the mag-based or other stimulant laxatives.

The OTC ointments usually do an okay job on flare-ups if the 'rhoids aren't too bad. After the crisis has abated, increase your fiber and water intake, exercise every day, and try adding a bit of a beneficial oil (Omega-3 fish oil pills, for example) to your diet.

If you do all this, there's a chance the 'rhoids may go into hiding again and stay there for a while.

Don't ask me how I know.

By the way, I'm not a doctor, if that gives you any clues...

-Rich
 
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And you thought you had to go all anonymous on us to talk. Look how many regulars are rhoidaholics and damn proud of it! :lol:

Almost as bad as the proud survivors of a vasectomy, who can't wait to tell you how great it was . . .
 
Well if there's one thing I know something about, it's roids. (Google up the meaning of "Okole" if you don't know any Hawaiian). This is not medical advice, just what I do.

Now, without going deep into O-ring A&P (that's anatomy and physiology not the other A&P), what you may have is a thrombosed external roid. Essentially a blood clot under the skin with a bunch of inflammation around it. They occasionally bleed which can be quite a fright.

to address it you've got to:

1. Not make it worse
2. Reduce the inflammation
3. Get it softened and eventually resorbed.

The reason you have as many opinions on how to address these as pilots have ...well... O-rings, is that there's no quick and sure fire remedy. These usually resolve on their own without any intervention which is why it seems like everything works.

This is what I do, by the numbers:

1. Don't make it worse by passing a pinecone. Metamucil or similar brand daily to soften the stool. Your daily mission should be as effortless as your landings.

2. Reduce inflammation. Keep it clean with flush-able wipes. Tucks may help some by providing a bit of an astringent effect and cooling things down but YMMV. You could also try an over the counter hemorrhoid cream with 1% hydrocortisone. Use it like they vote in Chicago: early and often. Motrin + or - as needed for pain. Don't expect miracles but it may help you sleep.

3. Soften the clot and get it resorbed. Hot water, either in the shower or tub. Stings just thinking about it. Don't go overboard and scald yourself down there. Yikes! But some even recommend Epsom salts in a hot water bath (Sometimes called "sitz baths"). I've never used Epsom salts. I use warm (pretty darn warm) water in the shower. Gotta lean over and get good exposure to the area (probably best if no one catches you like that. They may not fly with you again). Assume the position for minutes (5, 10, whatever you can endure). Remember rule no 1 though. A burn would only increase the inflammation and would not be smart. Ok to go a little lean of peak if you know what I mean.

Should start to feel better in 3 - 5 days, but don't expect it to go away for a week or two if it's a bad one. Go see you doctor if no better in a week or so, the pain keeps you up at night, or you get concerned about it for any reason. Don't fear the doc on this one. Roids are a PITA but not a downing condition (usually).

Cheers!

SO



Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk HD
 
tmyers said:
Do Roids really get messages?
Click to expand...

Why are swollen or inflamed vascular structures in the anal canal called "hemorrhoids", while small Solar System bodies in orbit around the Sun are called "asteroids"?

Should be the other way round.
 
soreokole said:
Well if there's one thing I know something about, it's roids. (Google up the meaning of "Okole" if you don't know any Hawaiian). This is not medical advice, just what I do.

Now, without going deep into O-ring A&P (that's anatomy and physiology not the other A&P), what you may have is a thrombosed external roid. Essentially a blood clot under the skin with a bunch of inflammation around it. They occasionally bleed which can be quite a fright.

to address it you've got to:

1. Not make it worse
2. Reduce the inflammation
3. Get it softened and eventually resorbed.

The reason you have as many opinions on how to address these as pilots have ...well... O-rings, is that there's no quick and sure fire remedy. These usually resolve on their own without any intervention which is why it seems like everything works.

This is what I do, by the numbers:

1. Don't make it worse by passing a pinecone. Metamucil or similar brand daily to soften the stool. Your daily mission should be as effortless as your landings.

2. Reduce inflammation. Keep it clean with flush-able wipes. Tucks may help some by providing a bit of an astringent effect and cooling things down but YMMV. You could also try an over the counter hemorrhoid cream with 1% hydrocortisone. Use it like they vote in Chicago: early and often. Motrin + or - as needed for pain. Don't expect miracles but it may help you sleep.

3. Soften the clot and get it resorbed. Hot water, either in the shower or tub. Stings just thinking about it. Don't go overboard and scald yourself down there. Yikes! But some even recommend Epsom salts in a hot water bath (Sometimes called "sitz baths"). I've never used Epsom salts. I use warm (pretty darn warm) water in the shower. Gotta lean over and get good exposure to the area (probably best if no one catches you like that. They may not fly with you again). Assume the position for minutes (5, 10, whatever you can endure). Remember rule no 1 though. A burn would only increase the inflammation and would not be smart. Ok to go a little lean of peak if you know what I mean.

Should start to feel better in 3 - 5 days, but don't expect it to go away for a week or two if it's a bad one. Go see you doctor if no better in a week or so, the pain keeps you up at night, or you get concerned about it for any reason. Don't fear the doc on this one. Roids are a PITA but not a downing condition (usually).

Cheers!

SO



Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk HD
Click to expand...

Welcome to POA.

And that's gotta be the best First Post I've ever read on any board.

-Rich
 
roncachamp said:
Why are swollen or inflamed vascular structures in the anal canal called "hemorrhoids", while small Solar System bodies in orbit around the Sun are called "asteroids"?

Should be the other way round.
Click to expand...

Well... just think of hemorrhoids as asteroids that circle Uranus.

-Rich
 
Unregistered said:
They won't just go away on their own?? Are you kidding me?
Click to expand...

For some odd reason, I had a bad bout of these about 20 years ago. They were so bad I had to see a doc about it (so embarrassing), but they eventually went away, and since then I've never had another occurrence. I must have changed something in my diet or habits to help, but I can't quite put my finger on it (obligatory hemorrhoid joke). So good luck to you. They suck!
 
The OP was trying his best not to be the butt of the ensuing jokes.
 
tmyers said:
I don't think it worked!!!

Asteroids circling Uranus!!!!! That's definitely quotable.
Click to expand...

I believe it's from a Star Trek joke.

Q. What's the similarity between the Starship Enterprise and toilet paper?

A. Both circle Uranus looking for Klingons!
 
Thank you everyone

I feel somewhat better (not that bad since I started the stuff mentioned here, actually) but they are still there - gross.

I am hoping that they will recede without the need for a doctor appt.

Jokes, bring them on.
 
No need. We have already conducted a thorough anal-ysis of the situation.
 
Just thought I'd update:

My severe stress went away, and with it, I guess, the hemorrhoids. I didn't do anything or even see a doctor. Well, I did buy Tucks and used that for a few weeks.

I had an eye tic at the same time as the 'rrhoids, so this was some real stress.

Thanks to everyone and I hope the sufferers don't have it anymore, either.
 
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