Got this in an email

[Dean]

Baby Planes
A mother and her son were flying Southwest Airlines from Kansas City to Chicago.

The son (who had been looking out the window) turned to his mother and asked, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The mother (who couldn't think of an answer) told her son to ask the stewardess.

So the boy asked the stewardess, "If big dogs have baby dogs and big cats have baby cats, why don't big planes have baby planes?"

The stewardess responded, "Did your mother tell you to ask me?"

The boy admitted that this was the case.

"Well, then, tell your mother that there are no baby planes because Southwest always pulls out on time. Your mother can explain it to you."

 

[KennyFlys]

Very good!

 

[izzydogg]

Finally an aviation post even my wife can appreciate.
Adios,
don

 

[Tom-D]

Joke time........

The future husband thought he was home alone with his future sister in law.

She asked "so tomarow you'll get married and settle down and have sex with only one woman for the rest of your life".

He answers "yep"

then the future sister in law drops her skirt and says "want to try some thing different before you settle down", and walks into her room.

The future husband turns and walks out the Door, on the porch he's met by his future father in law, who grabs his hand and says "Thank you my son you past the test welcome to the family."

moral to this story is always leave your comdoms in the car.

 

[gismo]

Joke time........

The future husband thought he was home alone with his future sister in law.

She asked "so tomarow you'll get married and settle down and have sex with only one woman for the rest of your life".

He answers "yep"

then the future sister in law drops her skirt and says "want to try some thing different before you settle down", and walks into her room.

The future husband turns and walks out the Door, on the porch he's met by his future father in law, who grabs his hand and says "Thank you my son you past the test welcome to the family."

moral to this story is always leave your comdoms in the car.

That was great Tom.

 

[KennyFlys]

Adding to the trend... downhill! ;-)

A ventriloquist is touring the clubs and stops to entertain in a small town. He's going through his usual off-color and "dumb blonde" jokes, when a well-presented blonde woman in the fourth row stands up and says:

"I've heard just about enough of your stupid blonde jokes! What makes you think you can stereotype women that way? What connection can a person's hair color possibly have with their fundamental worth as a human being? It is morons like you that prevent women like myself from being respected at work and in our communities and from reaching our full potential...because you and your anachronistic kind continue to perpetuate negative images against not only blondes, but women in general, for the sake of cheap laughs. You are a pathetic relic of the past, and what you do is not only contrary to Discrimination laws in every civilized country, it is deeply offensive to people with modern sensibilities and basic respect for their fellow citizens. You should hang your head in shame, you pusillanimous little maggot."

Flustered, the ventriloquist begins to apologize, when the blonde yells, "You stay out of this Mister! I'm talking to that little bastard on your knee!"
​

 

[Lawreston]

Re: Adding to the trend... downhill! ;-)

KILLER BISCUITS WANTED FOR ATTEMPTED MURDER
(the actual newspaper headline)

Linda Burnett, 23, a resident of San Diego, was visiting in-laws
and while there went to a nearby supermarket to pick up some
groceries.

Several people noticed her sitting in her car with the windows rolled
up and with her eyes closed, with both hands behind the back of her head.

One customer who had been at the store for a while became
concerned and walked over to the car. He noticed that Linda's eyes
were now open, and she looked very strange. He asked her if she was
okay, and Linda replied that she'd been shot in the back of the head,
and had been holding her brains in for over an hour.

The man called the paramedics, who broke into the car because the
doors were locked and Linda refused to remove her hands from
her head.

When they finally got in, they found that Linda had a wad of bread
dough on the back of her head. A Pillsbury biscuit canister had
exploded from the heat, making a loud noise that sounded like a gunshot,
and the wad of dough hit her in the back of her head. When she reached
back to find out what it was, she felt the dough and thought it was her
brains.

She initially passed out, but quickly recovered and tried to hold her
brains in for over an hour until someone noticed and came to her aid.
Linda is a blonde and a Democrat, but I'm certain that's irrelevant.