Getting Discouraged and Too Hard on Myself

Pilotl1234

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L.
I have been a student pilot for two years now (I had setbacks and I'm in college, so that took up a lot of time as well) and I am about to take my checkride soon. I haven't flown for a couple weeks, and I went out with my CFI to "get back in the saddle"/prepare for my checkride. When I went out, I messed up (almost) everything, so I was criticized by my CFI a lot. I love flying, and I want to be good at it, but sometimes I feel like I cannot get the hang of it. Then, because of this, I am extremely hard on myself, and get discouraged. Does anyone have any advice for me? I would greatly appreciate it.
 
First off, give yourself a break. You're over-thinking it, I suspect.

You might try a flight with another CFI just for fun; and, you should just go out solo and do some fun flying.

Then, when the time comes for the check ride, follow our own Cap'n Ron Levy's Checkride Advice. It is magic, and has worked for dozens - no, for hundreds - of pilot candidates.

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Sticky: http://www.pilotsofamerica.com/forum/showthread.php?t=15706

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Cap'n Ron Levy said:
1. Relax and enjoy it. Nationwide, about 90% of applicants pass on the first try, so look around and see if you think you’re as good as 9 out of 10 other students. Also, your instructor must maintain a pass rate of at least 80% to get his ticket renewed, so he’s not going to send you up unless he’s pretty darn sure you’ll pass – otherwise, he has to find four other people to pass to make up for you, and that’s not always easy.

2. Go over with your instructor the logbooks of the aircraft you're going to use the day BEFORE the checkride to make sure it's all in order (annual, transponder checks, ELT ops and battery, 100-hour if rented, etc.). If the airplane's paper busts, so do you. Run a sample W&B, too – get the examiner’s weight when you make the appointment. If you weigh 200, and so does the examiner, don’t show up with a C-152 with full tanks and a 350 lb available cabin load – examiners can’t waive max gross weight limits.

3. Relax.

4. Rest up and get a good night's sleep the night before. Don't stay up "cramming."

5. Relax.

6. Read carefully the ENTIRE PTS including all the introductory material. Use the checklist in the front to make sure you take all the stuff you need -- papers and equipment. And the examiner’s fee UP FRONT (too much chance a disgruntled applicant will refuse to pay afterward) in the form demanded by the examiner is a “required document” from a practical, if not FAA, standpoint.

7. Relax.

8. You’re going to make a big mistake somewhere. The examiner knows this will happen, and it doesn’t have to end the ride. What’s important is not whether you make a mistake, but how you deal with it – whether you recover and move on without letting it destroy your flying. Figure out where you are now, how to get to where you want to be, and then do what it takes to get there. That will save your checkride today and your butt later on.

9. Relax.

10. You're going to make some minor mistakes. Correct them yourself in a timely manner "so the outcome of the maneuver is never seriously in doubt" and you'll be OK. If you start to go high on your first steep turn and start a correction as you approach 100 feet high but top out at 110 high while making a smooth correction back to the requested altitude, don't sweat -- nail the next one and you'll pass with "flying colors" (a naval term, actually). If you see the maneuver will exceed parameters and not be smoothly recoverable, tell the examiner and knock it off before you go outside those parameters, and then re-initiate. That shows great sense, if not great skill, and judgement is the most critical item on the checkride.

11. Relax.

12. During the oral, you don’t have to answer from memory anything you’d have time to look up in reality. You never need to memorize and know everything. Categorize material as:

a. Things you must memorize (i.e. emergency procedures, radio calls, airspace, etc).
b. Things you must know or have reasonable understanding of (i.e. interpreting weather codes, non-critical regs).
c. Things you know about but can look up and will have time to look up on the ground.

(Thanks to Mark Bourdeaux for this categorization.) So if the examiner asks you about currency, it’s OK to open the FAR book to 61.56 and 61.57 and explain them to him. But make sure you know where the answer is without reading the whole FAR/AIM cover-to-cover. On the other hand, for stuff you’d have to know RIGHT NOW (e.g., best glide speed for engine failure, etc.), you’d best not stumble or stutter – know that stuff cold. Also, remember that the examiner will use the areas your knowledge test report says you missed as focus points in the oral, so study them extra thoroughly.

13. Relax.

14. Avoid this conversation:
Examiner - Q: Do you have a pencil?
Applicant - A: I have a #2, a mechanical, a red one...
Examiner - Q: Do you have a pencil?
Applicant - A: I also have an assortment of pens, and some highlighters...
Examiner - Q: Do you have a pencil?
Applicant - A: Yes.
Examiner - Thank you.
One of the hardest things to do when you’re nervous and pumped up is to shut up and answer the question. I've watched people talk themselves into a corner by incorrectly answering a question that was never asked, or by adding an incorrect appendix to the correct answer to the question that was. If the examiner wants more, he'll tell you.

15. Relax

16. Some questions are meant simply to test your knowledge, not your skill, even if they sound otherwise. If the examiner asks how far below the cloud deck you are, he is checking to see if you know the answer is “at least 500 feet,” not how good your depth perception is. He can’t tell any better than you can, and the only way to be sure is to climb up and see when you hit the bases, which for sure he won’t let you do.

17. Relax

18. Remember the first rule of Italian driving: "What's behind me is not important." Don't worry about how you did the last maneuver or question. If you didn't do it well enough, the examiner must notify you and terminate the checkride. If you are on the next one, forget the last one because it was good enough to pass. Focus on doing that next maneuver or answering the next question the best you can, because while it can still determine whether you pass or fail, the last one can’t anymore. If you get back to the office and he hasn't said you failed, smile to your friends as you walk in because you just passed.

19. Relax and enjoy your new license.


Ron Levy, ATP, CFI, Veteran of 11 license/rating checkrides, including 4 with FAA inspectors
 
Here's a thought....what types of books do you enjoy reading for fun? I have always been a big military history fan. When I started my PPL training I found it extremely helpful to read some of the memoirs of military fliers...I just finished "Boyd" (about John Boyd), and before that I read "Fighter Pilot" about Robin Olds, "Warriors at 500kts" (fiction), and " A lonely Kind of War" by Marshall Harrison (a OV-10 pilot during the Vietnam War) among others.

I must have gone through at least 7 aviation themed books within the last 4 months. Now I have no illusion about my training in the Cherokee. (My Brother teases me that the Piper Cherokee is not an F-4)- I will never be a fighter Jock- but what I enjoyed most about each book, were the sections dealing with primary training, and some of the challenges faced with weather, landings, and emergencies.

Each story helped me understand and relate (at least in a small way) to the training and some of the requirements that I would have to demonstrate with my CFI (without getting shot at which is always a plus:thumbsup:)-

Get some reading material- doesn't have to be military focused- just something that shows other people who have walked in the shoes you are trying to put on!!!!
 
My dad said that one of his instructors said: "if you fly like a horse's ass you ought to be told."

He went onward and upward from there and instructed during world war 2 and later flew 35 years for Pan Am without making headline of any kind, including not landing 1000 feet short of the runway. (one of his destination airports was SFO).

It is possible that a more encouraging instructor could help, or as other have said, more practice.
 
I have been a student pilot for two years now (I had setbacks and I'm in college, so that took up a lot of time as well) and I am about to take my checkride soon. I haven't flown for a couple weeks, and I went out with my CFI to "get back in the saddle"/prepare for my checkride. When I went out, I messed up (almost) everything, so I was criticized by my CFI a lot. I love flying, and I want to be good at it, but sometimes I feel like I cannot get the hang of it. Then, because of this, I am extremely hard on myself, and get discouraged. Does anyone have any advice for me? I would greatly appreciate it.


L. You should schedule at least 3 flights a week and never let 7 days go by without flying until you get your PPL.

The reason some pilots take 100 hrs to get their PPL is that they fly once a week or once every two weeks and occasionally once in 3 weeks. All of their later trainings are review of what they forgot.

It is like carrying water with a strainer full of holes. The water seeps out faster than you can scour it up.

This is a problem with flight schools that do not instigate regular, consistant flying.

it is not you but it is likely the situation.
The easiest cure is to double down. You have made it this far and you need to just clear your calender and do one thing until you are a pilot.

Borrow the money, load up the credit card, pawn the boom box but get it done, now.

There will never be a cheaper, better time to fly than right now.

Second, immature, unprofessional instructors need to criticize others to feel better about their own low self esteem. If you are a women this is even more likely to have happened to you. Get another instructor.

There is a difference in correcting a procedure and criticizing the person. If you need to go back to basic maneuvers than sobeit but that is a professional decision.

It is not uncommon for 11 graders to need to review something they missed in the 4th grade to pass algebra, that doesn't mean they need to repeat 7 years.

You must like your instructor and they must like you. If anyone says otherwise then get the heck out of there. Presumably you are not in the Army.
 
My dad said that one of his instructors said: "if you fly like a horse's ass you ought to be told."

He went onward and upward from there and instructed during world war 2 and later flew 35 years for Pan Am without making headline of any kind, including not landing 1000 feet short of the runway. (one of his destination airports was SFO).

It is possible that a more encouraging instructor could help, or as other have said, more practice.

So was your dad a horses ass or just fly like one? I guess that is the crux of the matter. Criticizing the pilot or criticizing the technique.

BTW flying for fun and going through a military school are two largely different maneuvers in case that fact escapes you.
 
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I'm the same way and I often need to step back and realize perfection 100% of the time isn't achievable. Safe is key. Did you complete the trip safely? I just completed my PPL a little over a month ago and been up with the family a few times. I've had a few bad landings..but were they really that bad? No. Nothing was damaged..they were done safely they just weren't as 'smooth' as I liked or touched down as early as I preferred. Learn, fix the mistake next time, and work on it.

On your checkride you don't need to demonstrate perfection, just safe.

Relax..Enjoy the scenery...look outside..remember why you got into flying in the first place..

and I agree with the other poster, try to fly atleast 2-3 times a week if possible otherwise your progress will be significantly slowed.
 
So was your dad a horses ass or just fly like one? I guess that is the crux of the matter. Criticizing the pilot or criticizing the technique.

BTW flying for fun and going through a military school are two largely different maneuvers in case that fact escapes you.


In the late 1930s when my dad took his training I would suspect that the tendency to be critical would probably be more prevalent than in the year 2013.

I am not sure exactly what sort of training it was but my dad ended up as a civilian instructor teaching military students in Central Florida during World War II. My dad managed to not be in the military even though he was 21 when the war started.

I was just trying to say that if you get discouraged and criticized that better things could be ahead. I know that we all have low points in our lives. I like the expression: the difference between a big shot and a little shot is that the big shot kept on shooting. It is easy to get discouraged and give up in any endeavor but good things can happen if we persist.
 
Try a phase check flight with any other CFI and practice more by yourself.
 
You kind of answered your own question. You haven't been flying enough to be extremely proficient, just how it is.

It is ok, you fly as much as you can, recognizing there will be some set-backs along the way. It is always difficult to get criticism, and, it is natural to allow it to bother you. But, shake it off and keep grinding. It ain't your fault, it ain't the instructor's fault, it just is what it is because of the circumstances.

You'll be fine.
 
Life is full of disappointments and challenges. Have a thicker skin...you'll need it for your CFI/Check Ride/Work/Friends/Friendnemies/Boss/In Laws, etc. Some things in life take a little longer to get use to, while others are just out of your control. Please don't be so "hard" on yourself and please get over it. You are gonna be a f-ing awesome pilot and there's no room for self-pity.

Btw, I'm not trying to be harsh on you, but I just want to give you the no B/S truth.
 
Practice makes perfect....try to get some lessons/refreshers scheduled closer together

Nothing else to add to this. :no:

OP, hold your arms out and look at the left one then the right one. See any feathers? :no:
Flying is a depreciable skill to humans. No matter how hard we flap our wings and run we are not gonna fly far. To stay current I fly 2-3 times a week when I can, even in the winter.

:redface: I still mess up now and then, I just don't tell anyone. ;)
 
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Everyone has good days and bad days. I'll bet there isn't a pilot on this board that hasn't chirped the tires or done something equally silly or ham-handed within the last 2 weeks.
I know I have.
The key is to keep working to make the good days happen more often and the bad days happen less.
 
I've been training for over three years. So, you're ahead of the game. ;)

You do what you can with what you have. If you're flying all you can, then that's all you can do. When you're not flying, spend every free moment thinking about flying. Keep your head in the game during the downtime.

Got a long trip in the car? Do some chair flying! Run through your memorized emergency checklist. Practice your GUMPS. Practice your VFR day/night required instruments.

Got downtime at home? Spend time in this section of the forum. Read about others' struggles and how they fixed them. Watch YouTube instructional videos. Close your eyes and run through an entire startup, taxi, and takeoff. Think about your V speeds.

Eating lunch alone? Go through your maneuver setups in your head: "Slow flight: carb heat on, power to 1700, hold altitude and trim, wait for white arc, one notch of flaps, hold altitude, etc. etc."

Fly when you can, and keep your head in the game when you can't. It's the only way to mitigate the atrophy that comes with downtime.
 
Try flying more often just before the ride,also get a phase check from another instructor.
 
Two years is to long. I assume hearing this you have not been flying regularly. You have to fly to keep moving forward. If you have to much time between flight you forget, and you lose ground. Also, lets say you just cannot fly 2-3 times a week. That's still something I can work with, IF and I mean a BIG IF you study your books and you have the knowledge you need. Understanding what's going on helps in the training.

I have no idea what you mean by criticizing, but if you cfi is just being mean, it's time to find a new cfi. If he is joking around, maybe you should sit down and explain to him how it's making you feel. Ultimately though you have to take responsibility for YOUR training.

Lastly, you have to relax, and enjoy it a little. If you don't take it a little easier on yourself, it's not going to get any easier.
We all do this because its fun, so have fun.
 
Two years is to long. I assume hearing this you have not been flying regularly. You have to fly to keep moving forward. If you have to much time between flight you forget, and you lose ground. Also, lets say you just cannot fly 2-3 times a week. That's still something I can work with, IF and I mean a BIG IF you study your books and you have the knowledge you need. Understanding what's going on helps in the training.

I have no idea what you mean by criticizing, but if you cfi is just being mean, it's time to find a new cfi. If he is joking around, maybe you should sit down and explain to him how it's making you feel. Ultimately though you have to take responsibility for YOUR training.

Lastly, you have to relax, and enjoy it a little. If you don't take it a little easier on yourself, it's not going to get any easier.
We all do this because its fun, so have fun.

consistency is the key. when I started taking my instrument lessons, my scheduling with my first CFII was rough. Weather, vacations, etc., and I was averaging one or two lessons per month. Biggest waste of time. I started with another CFII that was much more flexible, and I was flying 2-3 times per week. Much better retention of the lessons.

If you're flying lessons are spaced out, you won't be near as crisp. Try to get a few lessons crammed in shortly before your check ride to keep things fresh.
 
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