"Smart People Jokes"

I want a shirt that says: entropy isn't what it used to be

That'd be fun, or not
 
#4 could have been the best if it ended with "Einstein opened his eyes, turned around, and exlaimed 'Pascal, I found you. You're it."

(and left off the explanation)
 
Bob Noel said:
#4 could have been the best if it ended with "Einstein opened his eyes, turned around, and exlaimed 'Pascal, I found you. You're it."

(and left off the explanation)
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Or if Newton just left off the explanation.
 
Rene Descartes walks into a bar. The Bartender asks, "Want a beer?"
Descartes replies, "I think not!" and he disappears.
 
A neutron walks into a bar and orders a beer. The bartender serves him, and the neutron asks how much it will be. The bartender says, "For you, no charge."
 
10 kinds of people in the world. Those who understand binary and those who don't.
 
Re: 17;

The monk pays for his hot dog with a $20 and asks the vendor for change. The vendor replies "Change must come from within."
 
Why do I need to post at least 5 characters in order to attach a picture...?
 

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Depends on how many are required. I don't know the number, but "attempted" seems to fit here. Two is hardly a group, it's just a pair. Or couple. Definitely not a flock.
 
Photons don't matter.
Neutrinos hardly matter.
Positrons are another matter entirely.
 
Those were pretty lame, except number 12.

My favorite bumper stickers from the seventies were "eschew obfuscation" and "Stop Continental Drift!"
 
There are two hard problems in computer science: cache invalidation, naming things, and off-by-one errors.

There are two hard problems in distributed systems: 2. Exactly-once delivery 1. Guaranteed order of messages 2. Exactly-once delivery
 
Don-Martin_Think-Poster_54c17a93a4f201.55662184.jpg
 
jpower said:
There are 10 types of people in the world. Those who understand ternary, those who don't, and those who confuse it with binary.
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There are also those who understand the difference between enumerating two states with one bit, versus counting, where zero is traditionally a valid state for a count.
 
denverpilot said:
Ha. LOL'ed at 5. Groaned at 20.
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I told number 5 to a group of friends when we were all 13 or 14 years old. One guy took incredible offense to it - said: “That’s disgusting!”. And "I never expected that from you!". Then stormed off and didn't want to sit with us for the rest of the year.

I'm still baffled by his response to this day.
 
"There are 2 kinds of people. Those that can extrapolate conclusions from incomplete data "
 
"Smart" people are not as fun as people of average intelligence. Mostly.
 
Nerd. I got them, but still. Nerd ;)

I did enjoy the big game from the "TFR" though :D
 
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