Zeldman
Touchdown! Greaser!
Yep, sent her away....
...to visit her family in the Philippines.
We had to drive to Phoenix to catch a Southwest flight to LAX. 4.5 hours driving through the rim country, always awesome views, and into the oppressive heat of Phoenix. 112 degrees when we arrived. Hot, hot freaking hot. At least it is a dry climate, so when we burst into flames from the heat they will be dry flames.... Why anyone would want to live there is beyond me.
We arrived at LAX without problems. One thing LAX needs is signs. We made our way from terminal 1 to the international terminal and searched for the check in counters. Turns out they were one flight above us. One stupidly simple sign near a stairway of escalator would have been very helpful. We stepped into the check in area and it was a freaking mad house.!!
Very, very crowded with people pushing the luggage carts with I am sure 4 times the amount of weight they were originally designed for, with the kids ridding on top. Many people speaking all different languages going in all directions. Total chaos.
Then we get to the Philippine Air Lines counter. A nice lady there points to a sign that says PAL flight #103 from LAX to Manila is....wait for it....CANCELLED.!!! Of course that is the flight my wife was scheduled on.
We ask about it and we were told she had been rescheduled for a flight that left at 1430 that day. Obviously that did not work for us, so now what. She told us she can reschedule her on a flight leaving at 1630 on 01July. (This is on 28June.) I mean leave on 04July and arrive at 0200 in Manila. I mean depart on 29June at 1630 and arrive Manila 01July.
Another lady comes up and clarifies for us that she can depart on the next flight at 1630 tomorrow. Ok, that will work. She ask where would you like to sit.?? I tell her an aisle seat in first class would be nice for our trouble. She says she can't do that. I say she can because it has been done before. She tells us she can do an aisle seat with first class meals. I request a seat in front of the wing and she says Ok. We are happy again.
Then I ask what are we going to do for tonight.?? The nice lady tells us we can go home and come back tomorrow. I tell her home is a 2 hour flight followed by a 5 hour drive away, so a hotel room would be nice.
She says we can get you a voucher for La Quinta Inn, would that be Ok.?? I tell her La Quinta is a rat hole, you have anything better.?? She says the only other place would be Hyatt's. I say if that is the best you have then Ok. We get that done and my wife speaks up, where are we going to eat.?? So the nice lady gets us vouchers for dinner and breakfast. Ok, now we are happy again.
The room was very nice, our dinner was surprisingly good, but the inability of me to speak any other language besides English created a little difficulty in communications. Imagine speaking English only in the USA....
We woke the next morning rested and refreshed. The breakfast, a buffet, was again surprisingly good and plentiful. The fruit was fresh and tasty, very unlike the Walmart fruit we get here. After breakfast we go back up to our room and repack what we unpacked for the night. We rested, took a nap, then got ready to return to the mad house also known as LAX International terminal.
Upon our re-check in, we are told that carry ons are allowed only 7 kilos. My wifes carry on comes in at 15 kilos. Sooo... we take out her fruit and food she was carrying and get it down to 8.7 kilos, and the lady says that is ok. We get her new boarding pass and check to make sure the previous days agreements for meals and seating are still in place. They are, and my wife asks for a voucher for lunch. We get one and start looking for a place to eat. We find a nice looking sit down airport restaurant and we eat there. As we are eating, we re-pack the fruit and my wifes prepared meals that are in quart size zip lock bags into her carry on. She had prepared some stir fry and rice to take with her to eat on the plane.
Too soon it is time for her to go to security. We go there and say our temporary good byes. I tell her I will wait here until she calls me to tell me she is through security. After about 20 minutes she calls me. She tells me they took her fruit, but everything else was fine and she is heading to the gate.
It is time for me to go back to terminal one for my Southwest flight back to PHX. I go to ground transportation and after about 15 minutes I give up mainly due to the lack of a common language. I walk from international to terminal 1, about a 35 minute walk. Not bad for an old man that had a heart attack last year and pneumonia last month.
I go through security and find my way to the gate. It will be about a 2 hour wait until time for my flight. I find a seat in the recharge station to charge up my phone. As I sit there I get a text.... SWA flight #1014 will be delayed. Old departure time of 1605 is now changed to 1730. Ok. My wife calls and tells me they are loading and she is sitting in her seat. I tell her I am delayed. I wish her a good flight and tell her to turn her phone off. Her flight takes off and she is on her way.
At 1700 I get another text saying that SWA flight #1014 is delayed, new departure time will be 1815. At 1745 I get a text announcing the new departure time of 1845. Ok, the original departure time was 1605 with arrival at PHX at 1725.
Finally, at 1815 I walk to the gate to see that the departure time has been changed to basically whenever the plane leaves. At about 2000 a plane arrives at the gate and people start coming out of the jet way.
And finally, the call to get in line for the starting of the loading process. I have a fairly low number so I work my way to near the front of the line. Soon we are taxying and after about a 20 minute taxi we are on the runway. It is almost 2100 when the wheels leave the runway.
We get the PHX about 2215, another 15 minutes to taxy and deplane. My next problem, where the heck is my car.?? I was smart enough to write down the spot number, level, zone and terminal I parked at. But how do I get there.??
I looked at the signs again, one said baggage claim, so I started heading that way. A couple turns later I see a sign that says parking pointing to the right. And another that says economy parking to the left. Well, I am a cheap azz so I turn left. I come to some elevators, 8 to be exact. And a sign telling me where these elevators go. One says parking levels 4-6, so I get on that one. I push the 4 button and off we go. As the doors open I have to make another decision. Do I exit the area to the left or to the right.?? Well, I am left handed so I will go left. I see a sign that says parking zone D. Ok, zone B must be to the left.. I turn left and walk to the next zone. Parking zone E. Ok, wrong way. I go back to the elevators and go right this time.
I find the numbers for the parking spots and start going towards the number I am parked at. Did I mention the temp is still about 105.?? Again, why do people live here.??
I am getting close, then the numbers change. I get the idea to go to the other side of the row and the numbers are going in the right direction again. I find my keys and hit the lock button. Nothing. I hit it again. Nothing. I walk a little further and hit the button again. Something.!! Not far away there is a car flashing its lights.!! Oh wait, that is not my car. Hmmmm.... Someone else looking for their car.
I am only 25 numbers away from my car, why can't I see it.?? I hit the button again, and discover why I am not seeing my car. There is a huuuge Ford Expedition parked next to my car, totally hiding it.
I get in, start it up and crank up the air conditioner. I get some water and wet a blue paper shop towel and wipe down my face, neck and arms. I just sit there for 10 minutes and relax. I set up my GPS and it tells me I have a 4.5 hour drive to get home. I finally get underway at about 2300.
The drive home was uneventful. Except at Payson when I decided to stop and get gas. I saw a well lit station and pulled in. I checked the price of gas....$3.119 per gallon. I look across the street to the not very well lit station.. $2.819 per gallon. So I get back in my car to cross the street. At that time the Indy 500, the Daytona 500 and the 24 hours of Leman's started. Every car in Arizona decided to use that part of the road at the exact time I needed to cross. I eventually make a right turn, followed by a U-turn and then another right into the gas station. As I put the nozzle into the filler, I look up to see absolutely no traffic on the road.. Did I just imagine that.?? Am I really that tired.??
Gassed up and back on the road. At Holbrook I pull in and get a Dr Pepper and a small bag of tropical trail mix. That should keep me going. State line, back in New Mexico. Why is it called New Mexico.?? It is certainly not new and it is not Mexico..... Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a drive way.?? If I yell MOVIE in a crowded firehouse, will I get in trouble.?? If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent.?? Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines.?? How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign.?? Why did this road suddenly get so ruff.?? Oh, pay attention and get back on the road....
As I crossed the state line the time changes. And only 16 miles to go to get home. Pass the remains of the old route 66 roadside attractions, the dinosaurs, petrified rock stands, real made in China indian jewelry and the dilapidated remains of restaurants and gas stations. Here is my exit, cancel the cruise control, activate foot operated device to make car go slower, go into panic mode and press foot activated device to stop at the rapidly approaching stop sign. Wait, this is New Mexico, stop signs are just mere suggestions. Make the turn by Hampton inn, only 1.3 miles to go.
Home.!!! Only to find the electricity is off and I have to open the garage door manually. And true to form a few minutes after the door is open the electricity returns. 75 feet from the garage to the house, swamp cooler on, alarm off.. bed next, 0425 am. It has been a long day....
And my wife is gone for two weeks....
...to visit her family in the Philippines.
We had to drive to Phoenix to catch a Southwest flight to LAX. 4.5 hours driving through the rim country, always awesome views, and into the oppressive heat of Phoenix. 112 degrees when we arrived. Hot, hot freaking hot. At least it is a dry climate, so when we burst into flames from the heat they will be dry flames.... Why anyone would want to live there is beyond me.
We arrived at LAX without problems. One thing LAX needs is signs. We made our way from terminal 1 to the international terminal and searched for the check in counters. Turns out they were one flight above us. One stupidly simple sign near a stairway of escalator would have been very helpful. We stepped into the check in area and it was a freaking mad house.!!
Very, very crowded with people pushing the luggage carts with I am sure 4 times the amount of weight they were originally designed for, with the kids ridding on top. Many people speaking all different languages going in all directions. Total chaos.
Then we get to the Philippine Air Lines counter. A nice lady there points to a sign that says PAL flight #103 from LAX to Manila is....wait for it....CANCELLED.!!! Of course that is the flight my wife was scheduled on.
We ask about it and we were told she had been rescheduled for a flight that left at 1430 that day. Obviously that did not work for us, so now what. She told us she can reschedule her on a flight leaving at 1630 on 01July. (This is on 28June.) I mean leave on 04July and arrive at 0200 in Manila. I mean depart on 29June at 1630 and arrive Manila 01July.
Another lady comes up and clarifies for us that she can depart on the next flight at 1630 tomorrow. Ok, that will work. She ask where would you like to sit.?? I tell her an aisle seat in first class would be nice for our trouble. She says she can't do that. I say she can because it has been done before. She tells us she can do an aisle seat with first class meals. I request a seat in front of the wing and she says Ok. We are happy again.
Then I ask what are we going to do for tonight.?? The nice lady tells us we can go home and come back tomorrow. I tell her home is a 2 hour flight followed by a 5 hour drive away, so a hotel room would be nice.
She says we can get you a voucher for La Quinta Inn, would that be Ok.?? I tell her La Quinta is a rat hole, you have anything better.?? She says the only other place would be Hyatt's. I say if that is the best you have then Ok. We get that done and my wife speaks up, where are we going to eat.?? So the nice lady gets us vouchers for dinner and breakfast. Ok, now we are happy again.
The room was very nice, our dinner was surprisingly good, but the inability of me to speak any other language besides English created a little difficulty in communications. Imagine speaking English only in the USA....
We woke the next morning rested and refreshed. The breakfast, a buffet, was again surprisingly good and plentiful. The fruit was fresh and tasty, very unlike the Walmart fruit we get here. After breakfast we go back up to our room and repack what we unpacked for the night. We rested, took a nap, then got ready to return to the mad house also known as LAX International terminal.
Upon our re-check in, we are told that carry ons are allowed only 7 kilos. My wifes carry on comes in at 15 kilos. Sooo... we take out her fruit and food she was carrying and get it down to 8.7 kilos, and the lady says that is ok. We get her new boarding pass and check to make sure the previous days agreements for meals and seating are still in place. They are, and my wife asks for a voucher for lunch. We get one and start looking for a place to eat. We find a nice looking sit down airport restaurant and we eat there. As we are eating, we re-pack the fruit and my wifes prepared meals that are in quart size zip lock bags into her carry on. She had prepared some stir fry and rice to take with her to eat on the plane.
Too soon it is time for her to go to security. We go there and say our temporary good byes. I tell her I will wait here until she calls me to tell me she is through security. After about 20 minutes she calls me. She tells me they took her fruit, but everything else was fine and she is heading to the gate.
It is time for me to go back to terminal one for my Southwest flight back to PHX. I go to ground transportation and after about 15 minutes I give up mainly due to the lack of a common language. I walk from international to terminal 1, about a 35 minute walk. Not bad for an old man that had a heart attack last year and pneumonia last month.
I go through security and find my way to the gate. It will be about a 2 hour wait until time for my flight. I find a seat in the recharge station to charge up my phone. As I sit there I get a text.... SWA flight #1014 will be delayed. Old departure time of 1605 is now changed to 1730. Ok. My wife calls and tells me they are loading and she is sitting in her seat. I tell her I am delayed. I wish her a good flight and tell her to turn her phone off. Her flight takes off and she is on her way.
At 1700 I get another text saying that SWA flight #1014 is delayed, new departure time will be 1815. At 1745 I get a text announcing the new departure time of 1845. Ok, the original departure time was 1605 with arrival at PHX at 1725.
Finally, at 1815 I walk to the gate to see that the departure time has been changed to basically whenever the plane leaves. At about 2000 a plane arrives at the gate and people start coming out of the jet way.
And finally, the call to get in line for the starting of the loading process. I have a fairly low number so I work my way to near the front of the line. Soon we are taxying and after about a 20 minute taxi we are on the runway. It is almost 2100 when the wheels leave the runway.
We get the PHX about 2215, another 15 minutes to taxy and deplane. My next problem, where the heck is my car.?? I was smart enough to write down the spot number, level, zone and terminal I parked at. But how do I get there.??
I looked at the signs again, one said baggage claim, so I started heading that way. A couple turns later I see a sign that says parking pointing to the right. And another that says economy parking to the left. Well, I am a cheap azz so I turn left. I come to some elevators, 8 to be exact. And a sign telling me where these elevators go. One says parking levels 4-6, so I get on that one. I push the 4 button and off we go. As the doors open I have to make another decision. Do I exit the area to the left or to the right.?? Well, I am left handed so I will go left. I see a sign that says parking zone D. Ok, zone B must be to the left.. I turn left and walk to the next zone. Parking zone E. Ok, wrong way. I go back to the elevators and go right this time.
I find the numbers for the parking spots and start going towards the number I am parked at. Did I mention the temp is still about 105.?? Again, why do people live here.??
I am getting close, then the numbers change. I get the idea to go to the other side of the row and the numbers are going in the right direction again. I find my keys and hit the lock button. Nothing. I hit it again. Nothing. I walk a little further and hit the button again. Something.!! Not far away there is a car flashing its lights.!! Oh wait, that is not my car. Hmmmm.... Someone else looking for their car.
I am only 25 numbers away from my car, why can't I see it.?? I hit the button again, and discover why I am not seeing my car. There is a huuuge Ford Expedition parked next to my car, totally hiding it.
I get in, start it up and crank up the air conditioner. I get some water and wet a blue paper shop towel and wipe down my face, neck and arms. I just sit there for 10 minutes and relax. I set up my GPS and it tells me I have a 4.5 hour drive to get home. I finally get underway at about 2300.
The drive home was uneventful. Except at Payson when I decided to stop and get gas. I saw a well lit station and pulled in. I checked the price of gas....$3.119 per gallon. I look across the street to the not very well lit station.. $2.819 per gallon. So I get back in my car to cross the street. At that time the Indy 500, the Daytona 500 and the 24 hours of Leman's started. Every car in Arizona decided to use that part of the road at the exact time I needed to cross. I eventually make a right turn, followed by a U-turn and then another right into the gas station. As I put the nozzle into the filler, I look up to see absolutely no traffic on the road.. Did I just imagine that.?? Am I really that tired.??
Gassed up and back on the road. At Holbrook I pull in and get a Dr Pepper and a small bag of tropical trail mix. That should keep me going. State line, back in New Mexico. Why is it called New Mexico.?? It is certainly not new and it is not Mexico..... Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a drive way.?? If I yell MOVIE in a crowded firehouse, will I get in trouble.?? If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent.?? Why do they put Braille on the drive through bank machines.?? How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign.?? Why did this road suddenly get so ruff.?? Oh, pay attention and get back on the road....
As I crossed the state line the time changes. And only 16 miles to go to get home. Pass the remains of the old route 66 roadside attractions, the dinosaurs, petrified rock stands, real made in China indian jewelry and the dilapidated remains of restaurants and gas stations. Here is my exit, cancel the cruise control, activate foot operated device to make car go slower, go into panic mode and press foot activated device to stop at the rapidly approaching stop sign. Wait, this is New Mexico, stop signs are just mere suggestions. Make the turn by Hampton inn, only 1.3 miles to go.
Home.!!! Only to find the electricity is off and I have to open the garage door manually. And true to form a few minutes after the door is open the electricity returns. 75 feet from the garage to the house, swamp cooler on, alarm off.. bed next, 0425 am. It has been a long day....
And my wife is gone for two weeks....
