[NA] Ugh did I mess up? [NA]

SixPapaCharlie

SixPapaCharlie

May the force be with you
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My daughter had 2 friends spend the night last night.
They went to the park to play.

While walking back to the house, a landscaping vehicle drives by. They waved at him.
He stops, rolls down his window, holds up some cash and says "You girls want some money?"
They were already filming themselves being goofy so I have a video of the exchange.

It was a little creepy so I notified the local police and posted that this happened to our neighborhood fb page. No crime was committed it was just suspicious and may just have been a stupid attempt at being funny on his part. At any rate, they went the other direction and he drove off.

I have seen his vehicle in the neighborhood many times as he works for a local landscaping company. After the girls told me the story and I looked at the photos, I drove the neighborhood looking for him. He wasn't around.

Someone took my post and reworded it stating "This man is using money to lure little girls into getting into his truck" to which people are saying "Shoot the M-Effer" and of course her version of the post has spread 100 times over now.

The police said I did the right thing to notify them and raise awareness.

I don't know if the guy was being cute or if he is a creeper. I did what I thought I should do and note something suspicious. For people to be saying he is a creeper and should be shot concerns me.

Did I handle this poorly.
 
I don't think you did the wrong thing. Someone else changed what you said, and it escalated.

That said, these are scary times.

Made even more scary by the media (professional) and social media.

Innocuous things become deadly. Every little molehill becomes a mountain to die on. The envelopes keep getting stretched.
 
Hard to say. Your actions, while probably the best legal course, have removed your ability to shoot the SOB without being suspected.....

Glad the girls are okay.
 
I don’t think you did anything wrong. Saying anything suggestive like that to underage girls isn’t appropriate, especially when that person is a stranger and you’re unsure of their intentions.

This man could be a well seasoned jokester who meant no harm, but he could also be a predator, these days, you just don’t know.
 
You did the right thing. There are too many creepy perverts around today. One needs to be wary of this sort of behavior. Personally, I would have done the same as you did.

The vigilantes are simply out of line. They are as bad as the creepy ones.... there's a reason we have due process of law.
 
We must all remember that not everyone has a borderline sense of humor and we best not cross any lines of poor taste or bad judgement.....for fear of feeling the wrath of the law or the FAA.

Right BrYan?
 
I would also be making a call to the owner or manager of the landscaping business and letting them know what their employee or contractor was doing in a truck bearing their brand.
 
I’m not sure if I missed it, but upon your review of the video evidence, was there something he said that was inappropriate or was it just the appearance from far away? I mean, if he was going to pay them to put up landscaping flyers door-to-door, it’s not really that “creepy”.
 
Was it right to notify the police? Absolutely.
Was it right to turn over the video to the police? Absolutely.
Was it right to post the video on social media and let anyone who wished to view it make snap judgements, death threats, and convictions in the court of public opinion? Sounds like you're currently wrestling with that one. I'm glad. I hope we get to a place soon where people wrestle with that BEFORE they post things that publicly shame others. Based upon your description, it sure sounds like some serious creepers were foiled, and you have had a hand in preventing something seriously awful from happening in the future. However, there's also the admittedly remote possibility that what was observed and filmed was just a really stupid attempt at humor by someone w/ limited mental capqcity. Determining which is which is the purview of law enforcement and the courts, not FaceBook. Just my opinion.
If MY daughter had had the same experience as yours, I'd admittedly be MUCH less pragmatic about the situation... I do understand why you did it.
 
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True story....

My best hunting buddy's neighbor (lived there for over 5 years, has a landscaping company) went 2 doors down and knocked on the door. The 17 year old girl was home alone and answered the door knowing who it was.

The guy grabs her shirt and fondles her breasts.

Throws her $100 bill and says something to the effect of 'be quiet about this'.

The guy is only charged with a class C misdemeanor.


Here is another one about a man who called 911 on himself...

https://www.kvue.com/article/news/n...jail/465-d5758f3a-2792-4af8-a5fd-097e45d6caef

Not all men do things like this, but our children need to be protected. Monsters live among us. It is our job as MEN to protect our family and friends.

I am not saying shoot the guy, but you did the right thing reporting him to the police.
 
I don't think YOU did anything wrong.

I hate having my words twisted like that by people I don't even know.

We adopted a little dog from the SPCA recently. Well, it bolted from the house and it took 3 weeks for someone to catch it.

I said the following on the town Facebook page after it was clear he wouldn't just walk up to anybody, "We've only had him for an hour before he ran. We don't know how he was treated by his previous owner but he is not coming to anyone. He doesn't know where home is. He will have to be caught in a trap."

Pretty much word for word, that is what I posted.

This is what some woman said after reading that, "The dog was abused when it was young. It belongs to an autistic kid."

I'm still not sure how that comment was meant to help find the dog. Or how she knew my son is autistic, or that we wanted that info posted on Facebook.

When we finally got the dog back, a couple nights of spoiling, good food and sleeping on the foot of the bed, he hasn't left my side. I don't think he was abused at all, he was just scared, surrendered to the SPCA, got neutered, taken home by new people and he just ran.
 
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Well, what you apparently did NOT mess up is how you raised your daughter. That first line of defense against suspicious activity is key. Nice work, Mr. & Mrs. Withawye!
 
You did fine. You reported a suspicious activity. If the guy was just joking, being an idiot has consequences. And if, even jokingly, this guy is asking strange children if they want some money, "idiot" is probably the kindest description.

You can feel bad about how your comment was taken, changed, perhaps even twisted. I've seen it and the torch-n-pitchfork crowd has always been nasty. But you are not responsible for it.
 
texasag93 said:
It is our job as MEN to protect our family and friends.
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You might want to retract your statement and apologize to any snowflakes and feminazis who choose to decide to find an offense in your words that should be protected by the 1st amendment.
Do you own a Toxic Masculinity t-shirt? :D
 
BigBadLou said:
You might want to retract your statement and apologize to any snowflakes and feminazis who choose to decide to find an offense in your words that should be protected by the 1st amendment.
Do you own a Toxic Masculinity t-shirt? :D
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Probably a man-spreader too...... bet he holds the door open for people as well.
 
Bryan, I'd agree that I don't think you did anything wrong. That said, I'm not sure if I would've started off by posting the thing to Facebook unless I was expecting that sort of response. That said, the guy deserved it. Whether or not he had nefarious intentions, that's a stupid thing to say and anyone with half a brain should realize the potential repercussions.

I think you should have expected people to twist your words and the path to go the way it did. You've seen this happen to you personally before vis-a-vis the FSDO incident earlier this year.

That said, I'm not entirely convinced that the guy isn't getting what he deserves with that sort of treatment. He needs to know that it's not ok to do what he did, joking or not. Death threats from the president of the HOA has its issues, but it should get the point across to him.
 
No, you did nothing wrong. Those dudes were creeps and for all you know they may be genuine predators... or they may not be... but you alerted other potential people to be on the lookout and thereby potentially save someone's life

If someone else takes that word of caution towards an unreasonable extent that's on them.. not you.

If you return a piece of chicken to the grocery store because it doesn't smell right it's prudent of the store to check their other stock. If the produce department then decides to never sell chicken again, that (unreasonable) measure is on them.
 
Understand why you're conflicted, but no you shouldn't feel bad about it. The guy either had bad intentions or has a bad sense of humor. It's not your job to read his mind and figure out which way he meant it, it's your job to protect your family.
 
Ted DuPuis said:
Bryan, I'd agree that I don't think you did anything wrong. That said, I'm not sure if I would've started off by posting the thing to Facebook unless I was expecting that sort of response. That said, the guy deserved it. Whether or not he had nefarious intentions, that's a stupid thing to say and anyone with half a brain should realize the potential repercussions.

I think you should have expected people to twist your words and the path to go the way it did. You've seen this happen to you personally before vis-a-vis the FSDO incident earlier this year.

That said, I'm not entirely convinced that the guy isn't getting what he deserves with that sort of treatment. He needs to know that it's not ok to do what he did, joking or not. Death threats from the president of the HOA has its issues, but it should get the point across to him.
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FWIW I didn't post it to my fb page, I posted it to the neighborhood watch fb page which turns out is probably worse in hindsight.
 
SixPapaCharlie said:
FWIW I didn't post it to my fb page, I posted it to the neighborhood watch fb page which turns out is probably worse in hindsight.
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I think posting it to Facebook in any context, especially something like that, would be expected to have the same result.
 
One of the people that responded to my post in the neighborhood facebook page commented "This is the same man that tried to punch me (a small woman) because I asked him to slow down when driving through the neighborhood"

I feel less bad having read that.
 
I honestly cant believe you're second guessing yourself in this.

To me there is no reasonable explanation for this guys actions. The fact that he might be local, means nothing. The police reports are full of cases of bad things happening to young girls by neighbors and local workers.

Seriously, what possible explanation can there be for this guys actions that dont represent bad intent?

I would have done exactly what you did.
 
Bacho said:
I probably would have started by calling his employer.
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Lots of landscaping companies are a one-man show. The guy driving the truck is the guy that owns the company. Kind of hard to get a guy fired when he works for himself.
 
SixPapaCharlie said:
One of the people that responded to my post in the neighborhood facebook page commented "This is the same man that tried to punch me (a small woman) because I asked him to slow down when driving through the neighborhood"

I feel less bad having read that.
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So NOW is it socially acceptable to say "Shoot the MFer"? :)
 
Mtns2Skies said:
So NOW is it socially acceptable to say "Shoot the MFer"? :)
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Wasn't it always? I'm surprised we're not now discussing the best caliber, solid versus hollow points, frangibles, etc. Personally I like Hornady Critical Defense loads in .357 magnum, but I'm open to other opinions.
 
Half Fast said:
Wasn't it always? I'm surprised we're not now discussing the best caliber, solid versus hollow points, frangibles, etc. Personally I like Hornady Critical Defense loads in .357 magnum, but I'm open to other opinions.
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Well are we limited to just handguns? If not, I'd propose 7.62x54R... because sometimes people like to hide behind things.
 
Mtns2Skies said:
Well are we limited to just handguns? If not, I'd propose 7.62x54R... because sometimes people like to hide behind things.
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Good point. My Mosin Nagants take 7.62x54 but their accuracy isn't that great. 7.62x39 from my SKS would be better for me. I like my AR but that little .223 caliber slug just doesn't have quite enough wallop.
 
Half Fast said:
Wasn't it always? I'm surprised we're not now discussing the best caliber, solid versus hollow points, frangibles, etc. Personally I like Hornady Critical Defense loads in .357 magnum, but I'm open to other opinions.
Click to expand...

Mtns2Skies said:
Well are we limited to just handguns? If not, I'd propose 7.62x54R... because sometimes people like to hide behind things.
Click to expand...
I was thinking along the lines of a Desert Eagle Mark XIX .50 AE... incredible stopping power - from what I’ve heard. :)
 
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