Getting Wife Buy-In on PPL

[GRG55]

My wife (GF at the time) encouraged me to get my private, saw some home movies of my brother and me when kids going for a ride in a 172. She said she'd never seen me so happy and I should do it. Didn't change when we got married, except she thought I should get an IR so our traveling by plane would be more dependable. I was happy to oblige. Later she thought 120 kts was a little slow, so I bought the Lancair. Marriage requires sacrifices.

Does she have a sister?
My first wife doesn't like to fly at all.

 

[Cogito]

Does she have a sister?
My first wife doesn't like to fly at all.

Not single.~~
Yes, my wife enjoys flying and going to interesting places, but of course it's about helping each other find their bliss. Right now that means she's producing a TV show in Australia, I miss her but wouldn't dream of trying to stand in her way. Why would you want to be with someone who would? Side benefit; she's in a country that has 1/50th the Covid we have.

 

[Daleandee]

Ok, then it's time to get studying, the pandemic has been crap for most things, but I did my commercial and CFI this year. As mentioned earlier, learn the PHAK and Airplane Flying Handbook (both free from the FAA.) I also found "Stick and Rudder" a great help. Then you've got two years after you pass your written test to pass your checkride. Then you'll have enough time to master your first plane in time to start taking your kids for rides: (this video never gets old)

I've seen and shared that video numerous times and still it wears me down, especially when she reaches her arms out to fly! I've taken a few young ones flying and they just seem to love it. It was six years ago that I took my youngest grandson for his for flight:

 

[FormerHangie]

Thanks for the thoughts. Having been happily married 7.5 years now, 2.5 of them with a kiddo, I'm confident that if I told my wife, "Good luck with the screaming newborn and destructive toddler. I'm going flying!" I wouldn't be allowed back inside anytime soon.

Being left with two children to care for while you go out to play is the crux of the issue. When my daughters were small, I got it in my head that I wanted to take up hang gliding, but I knew the timing was not right. I waited until the younger one was in kindergarten before starting. My wife, who was pretty much a stay at home mom, was getting five days a week with them out of the house, and I didn't feel bad about taking most of one weekend day to fly.

I'm hoping that's going to be the case too. My son and I already hang out at the airport on the weekend since we both love watching planes, and it's a great way to spend time together.

As for other hobbies: I ski, golf, and mountain/road bike too. With the exception of golf, those are all activities that my wife and I share to one degree or another. Probably possible to dial back the mountain biking, which she doesn't like as much, in favor of some flight time. We also love traveling, and the possibility of orchestrating a trip from, say, Denver to Glacier National Park might be appealing. It's otherwise an interminable drive.

Something's going to have to give when you start flying. I'd keep the skiing since that will be something you can do as a family. Eventually you could all ride mountain bikes together, provided the adults are still up to it.

Yes, it’s always easier to get forgiveness than permission.

Not with something this expensive and time consuming. A night out with the guys, sure, but he's looking at spending tens of thousands of dollars of the family budget on lulz.

These help me convince my significant other to let me learn to fly threads always make me happy about my marriage and make me sad for the one who created the thread.

'Because its important to me' is the only thing I ever need to say to my wife and the only thing she needs to say to me.

And when it comes to recreational flying, 'because I want to' is really the only valid justification there is. Any reasons beyond that are clever marketing at best. Although private pilots can and do use the plane for transportation and family trips, its not a practical or reliable way to move yourself or the family from point A to point B unless and until you accumulate a boat load of experience and part with a boat load of money. Its a hole in the sky that you throw hundred dollar bills into because you enjoy it. If your partner isn't going to be on board with that, it might be time to reevaluate.

I think this is a very important point. To make good use of an airplane as a traveling machine is a pretty big commitment of both money an time.

 

[Cogito]

I've seen and shared that video numerous times and still it wears me down, especially when she reaches her arms out to fly! I've taken a few young ones flying and they just seem to love it. It was six years ago that I took my youngest grandson for his for flight:

Says that kid was 6 at the time, which makes her 14 now, could solo a glider!
Hope that cub is still in the family.

 

[GRG55]

Does she have a sister?
My first wife doesn't like to fly at all.

Not single.~~
Yes, my wife enjoys flying and going to interesting places, but of course it's about helping each other find their bliss. Right now that means she's producing a TV show in Australia, I miss her but wouldn't dream of trying to stand in her way. Why would you want to be with someone who would? Side benefit; she's in a country that has 1/50th the Covid we have.

It was a joke.
My wife breeds, raises and trains horses for dressage. I have two airplanes. It's a race to see which one of us drives the family into insolvency first. (that's also a joke)
We got married later in life; I was 34. First marriage for both of us. Going on 32 years now. I tell my friends the reason it works is because we have nothing in common...and therefore we never have any reason to have an argument over anything.

 

[craigh]

Make the opportunity. I either did not have time or money until i was 45. Kids were very active in sports, etc. SWMBO decided that the only way we could make all the kids competitions was via airplane. So, I got my license and bought a Mooney. If you have the PPL and IR, the world opens up for you in the future. Once you have it, you can always re-activate currency. Wish I had done it much younger in life. BTW, I don't post much here, because other say it better.

 

[KitCarson]

Final update: Success! We're agreed on a flight training start in ~3 years, and my suggested budget prevailed. In the meantime, I can starting pursuing my medical. (It's going to be complicated. I've already talked to Dr. Bruce.) And I can work on ground school as some of you have suggested.

To everyone: thank you. To those of you who suggested I solve the problem by finding a new wife: I'm sticking with this one.

 

[Huckster79]

These help me convince my significant other to let me learn to fly threads always make me happy about my marriage and make me sad for the one who created the thread.

'Because its important to me' is the only thing I ever need to say to my wife and the only thing she needs to say to me.

And when it comes to recreational flying, 'because I want to' is really the only valid justification there is. Any reasons beyond that are clever marketing at best. Although private pilots can and do use the plane for transportation and family trips, its not a practical or reliable way to move yourself or the family from point A to point B unless and until you accumulate a boat load of experience and part with a boat load of money. Its a hole in the sky that you throw hundred dollar bills into because you enjoy it. If your partner isn't going to be on board with that, it might be time to reevaluate.

I concur... I’ve lived too many of my years in relationships that were based on being a good bf/husband meant following the others desires and limitations to make things “good”. That’s not right, and in my opinion no way to live...

I Wont ever again... A partner says “how do I help you achieve your dreams?” And visa versa... I think I’ve finally found mine like that...fingers crossed...

I don’t want a partner I can call to bail me out of jail, Cuz I want a partner who would be sitting by me in the cell

 

[Daleandee]

To those of you who suggested I solve the problem by finding a new wife: I'm sticking with this one.

Congrats on a great outcome! As to the part about finding another wife ... you were being subjected to a random POA test ...

You did pass but you had some of us worried there for a minute!

 

[mcdewey]

Ok, then it's time to get studying, the pandemic has been crap for most things, but I did my commercial and CFI this year. As mentioned earlier, learn the PHAK and Airplane Flying Handbook (both free from the FAA.) I also found "Stick and Rudder" a great help. Then you've got two years after you pass your written test to pass your checkride. Then you'll have enough time to master your first plane in time to start taking your kids for rides: (this video never gets old)

That video never gets old for me either.