Coronavirus Memes

[benyflyguy]

 

[Scrabo]

He passes to Moses... Moses shoots, HE SCORES!!!

Well played

 

[Bill]

Well played

I always heard it as:

Jesus saves, but Gretzky scores!

 

[smv]

I always heard it as:

Jesus saves, but Gretzky scores!

My version ony really works well in person when you can add the typical crescendo voice inflection that typically happens when someone finally scores in either soccer or hockey (AKA: soccer on ice).

 

[benyflyguy]

 

[CharlieD3]

It's not too soon. We all need reasons to laugh nowadays!

fly to the scene of the incident, or be recovered at the scene of the tragedy

 

[Dave Theisen]

 

[Palmpilot]

 

[Palmpilot]

 

[Palmpilot]

 

[Possum]

 

[Warlock]

 

[Let'sgoflying!]

 

[Half Fast]

 

[Ventucky Red]

From a UPS delivery driver... 5 types of customers since the “Rona”:

1) Steve: He has been waiting for this moment his whole life. He has been drinking boilermakers since 10:00 am in his recliner and his AR15 is within arms reach. He has 6 months provisions in the basement and a bug out bag due west buried in the woods. Steve demands a handshake as I give him his package. He’s sizing me up as I deliver his ammo. Steve will survive this.

2) Brad: He is standing at his window wearing skinny jeans and a Patagonia t-shirt. He is mad because there were no organic tomatoes at Whole Foods today. He points at the ground where he has taped a 6 ft no go zone line from his porch. I leave his case of Fuji water, organic granola bites, and his new “Bernie Bro” hat at the tape. Brad will not survive.

3) Nancy: She has sprayed everything with Thieves oil. Bought all the Clorox wipes, hand sanitizer, toilet paper, meat, and bread from the local grocery chain. She has quarantined her kids and sprays them with a mixture of thieves, lavender, & mint essential oils daily. She has posted every link known to man about “The Rona” on her social media. She will spray you if you break the 6 ft rule. I will leave her yet another case of toilet paper. She will last longer than Brad, but not Steve.

4) Karen: She has called everybody and read them the latest news on “The Rona”. She asked for the manager at Food Lion, Walmart, Publix, McDonald's, Chi-Fil-A, and Vons all before noon demanding more toilet paper. Karen’s kids are currently faking “The Rona” to avoid her. I’m delivering the “Hello Kitchen” to her. Karen will not survive longer than Brad.

5) Mary: Is sitting in the swing watching her kids have a water balloon fight in the front yard as she is on her fourth glass of wine. She went to the store and bought 2 cases of pop tarts, 6 boxes of cereal, 8 bags of pizza rolls, and a 6 roll pack of toilet paper. There is a playlist of Bob Marley, Pink Floyd, and Post Malone playing in the background. I’m bringing her second shipment of 15 bottles of wine in 3 days. Mary will survive and marry Steve. Together they will repopulate the earth.

Works for me...

 

[Dave Theisen]

 

[Let'sgoflying!]

 

[Let'sgoflying!]

 

[Let'sgoflying!]

 

[Shawn]

This man will survive...

 

[AggieMike88]

View attachment 84613

More funny if there was a wee bit of blue ribbon seen just below the hem.

 

[Briar Rabbit]

Half of us are going to come out of this quarantine as amazing cooks.
The other half will come out with a drinking problem.

I used to spin that toilet paper like I was on Wheel of Fortune. Now I
turn it like I'm cracking a safe

I need to practice social-distancing from the refrigerator.

Still haven't decided where to go for Easter ----- The Living Room or
The Bedroom

PSA: every few days try your jeans on just to make sure they fit.
Pajamas will have you believe all is well in the kingdom.

Homeschooling is going well. 2 students suspended for fighting and 1
teacher fired for drinking on the job.

I don't think anyone expected that when we changed the clocks we'd go
from Standard Time to the Twilight Zone

This morning I saw a neighbor talking to her cat. It was obvious she
thought her cat understood her. I came into my house, told my dog.....
we laughed a lot.

So, after this quarantine.....will the producers of My 600 Pound Life
just find me or do I find them?

Quarantine Day 5: Went to this restaurant called THE KITCHEN. You have
to gather all the ingredients and make your own meal. I have no clue how
this place is still in business.

My body has absorbed so much soap and disinfectant lately that when I
pee it cleans the toilet.

Day 5 of Homeschooling: One of these little monsters called in a bomb
threat

I'm so excited --- it's time to take out the garbage. What should I wear?

I hope the weather is good tomorrow for my trip to Puerto Backyarda. I'm
getting tired of Los Living Room.

Classified Ad: Single man with toilet paper seeks woman with hand
sanitizer for good clean fun.

Day 6 of Homeschooling: My child just said "I hope I don't have the same
teacher next year".... I'm offended.

Better 6 feet apart than 6 feet under!

 

[Capt. Geoffrey Thorpe]

 

[Dave Theisen]

 

[Jim K]

 

[Skywalker]

Found it on FB and loved it...

 

[timwinters]

There are soooo many freakin' idiots out there...most of them are the workers at big box stores. I just ordered a custom t-shirt that reads:

I can't punch you in the teeth
If you're 6' away from me!

 

[cowman]

 

[timwinters]

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[timwinters]

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[timwinters]

 

[Tarheelpilot]

Too soon....

Ignore the thread.

not too soon. Continue with humor.

 

[Tarheelpilot]

 

[Tarheelpilot]

 

[Fiveslide]

View attachment 84700

Looks like something my son would do for just for the fun of it.

 

[SoonerAviator]

 

[Capt. Geoffrey Thorpe]

 

[Pilawt]

Our daughter-in-law just posted this:

 

[denverpilot]

LOL. I got suckered into moderation of a CV Memes group that grew to 12,000.

Tapatalk has been having a bit of a virus overload hissy or I’d share more of them.

Most here were dupes from there, but a few are golden and have been acquired! Resistance is futile!

 

[Ventucky Red]

Only in California, maybe Floor-E-Duh too